Clarity

Jeremy had been plagued with thoughts of Lou for the rest of the week. Every little thing he did reminded him of her for some god-awful reason. He didn’t even know her. Yet there he was, sitting and strumming on his guitar while thinking of her. He would never admit it, but he supposed it was because he wasn’t very good at being told no.

“I’m Jeremy fucking Renner,” He mumbled to himself, reaching around the couch for his iPhone. “This shouldn’t be happening to me.”

Once he had found it, he proceeded to hit himself in the face with it. He told himself he’d never get pigheaded about his success. It wasn’t long ago that he was sitting in an apartment in the dark, without heat, wondering when his next real meal would be. Still, he quickly typed in his message to Chris.



Chris picked up his phone after it buzzed, his eyes quickly glazing over the text message from Jeremy. He chuckled to himself, shaking his head. “Goddamn Lou, you’ve got this man reeling.”

He decided he had to ask what happened between them after all. He got up from his bed, trotting down the hall and to Lou’s room. “Lou,” He called.

“Yeah?” She asked, her voice muffled from inside her closet. She was knelt down on the floor, piled into the decent-sized closet. Clothes lay strewn along the floor, causing Chris to raise an eyebrow at her. He strode in anyway, plopping himself on her bed.

“What happened between you and Mr. Renner?” He got straight to the point, his curiosity getting the best of him. She looked up from the shirts she was looking at, her eyebrows furrowed.

“Mr. Who?”

“Jeremy,” Chris clarified, and recognition spread throughout her face. She smirked, and her brother knew it couldn’t have been good.

“Nothing happened. I was my usual, charming self around him and he simply couldn’t handle it,” Lou said matter-of-factly, a look of triumph gracing her features. She returned her attention to her clothes while he got to texting Jeremy.

“What are you doing?” Lou asked, getting up and pushing the pile of clothes back into her closet with her foot. He watched her, amused.

“He’s very curious about you,” Chris commented. Lou made an exaggerated disgusted face at the thought of him.

“Beautiful,” He added sarcastically. “But honestly Lou, how long is this whole ‘don’t let anyone get too close’ thing going to last? Jeremy’s a nice guy. Why don’t you give him a chance?”

Lou raised her eyebrows disapprovingly at her older brother. “As far as I know, Jeremy’s the farthest thing from nice. I think it’s kind of creepy that he’s asking you about me.”

Chris raised his eyebrows back at his younger sister. “You don’t really make it easy.”

She shrugged. “Tough shit.”

She quietly walked over to her accessories and began sorting through them, keeping her eyes glued to the dresser they rested on. Chris knew to drop it.

“Are you going out tonight?” He asked softly, getting up from her bed and heading for the hallway.

“I think so,” She answered him, continuing her accessory search.

“Alright. You know the rules,” Chris reminded her. Lou looked up from the dresser and into Chris’s blue eyes. She could see the worry emanating from them, yet he still gave her freedom because somehow through it all he still trusted her. She ran to him and hugged him tight. He let out a laugh, wrapping his arms around her.

“I love you,” She mumbled into his shirt.

“Love you too, sis.”



Lou let herself back into Chris’s house, which she called home. Her eldest brother had taken her under his wing when things got bad four years prior, and ever since then they had stuck together. It had been a long road, and most of it was still unpaved. Lou was far from recovered.

But she and Chris developed a system, and so far it had seemed to work. Her parents worried less about her knowing that she was in good hands. Chris kept her working on herself, and even if she was never alone for very long he still gave her the space and freedom she needed to feel functional.

She was comfortable where she was, but there was a growing dread in the pit of her stomach. She knew that this couldn’t last much longer. Chris couldn’t take care of his baby sister for the rest of his life. It wasn’t fair to him. She already felt guilty enough, what with him taking on a pseudo-parental role with her and providing her with more than the necessities to survive. The thought of moving out made her fingers twitch with anxiety. She couldn’t see herself moving out and staying healthy. Hell, she wasn’t anywhere close to healthy now.

She leaned against the door to the garage, letting the back of her head hit the wood. She bit the inside of her lip tightly, shutting her eyes in hopes of stopping the tears from falling. This wasn’t how it was supposed to be.

“Lou?” A female voice asked timidly. Her eyes shot open and to Chris’s new-old girlfriend, Minka.

Lou cleared her throat and stood up straight. “Hi, Minka,” She said tiredly, taking off her heels and letting her feet flatten out against the cool tile.

“Are you hungry? We ordered in and overestimated.” The still unfamiliar brunette smiled hopefully at her. Lou nodded, following behind Minka. Chris was asleep on the couch with East, the bulldog snoring only a bit louder than her brother. She giggled at the sight of them.

Lou looked back to the beautiful girl her brother was dating, watching her make a plate of food. She wasn’t thick; she knew that Minka was trying to earn her trust so that her brother would continue dating her. There were two deal breakers for Chris Evans when it came to relationships: his family and his dog.

“So Chris told me that Jeremy Renner is working his ass off to get you to talk to him,” Minka said, glancing at Lou with a smirk on her face. “Nice job, girl! He’s hot.”

Lou held in her eye roll. She knew how much this girl meant to Chris, and if anything she owed it to him to at least be nice to her. She laughed nervously in response, looking for something to say. “Yeah, I’m not really that interested.”

Minka furrowed her eyebrows and Lou saw the genuine concern show through her eyes. “Why not?”

“Um,” Lou fumbled with her words. “I…I’m just not emotionally ready for a relationship.”

Minka nodded understandingly. “I get it.”

Lou was grateful for her short, non-invasive response. “You do?”

“Of course! I think it’s great that you’d rather work on yourself than pull someone into something you’re not ready for. Really admirable,” Minka assured her.

She was still unsure of Minka’s true intentions, but for now she was okay in Lou’s book.