We Only Breathe For So Long

My heartbeat had increased from running up the flight of stairs. I had no clue where we were going but at this quantity of steps, I almost thought we could reach heaven. The venue wasn’t a tall building. It was a medium-sized theater that had a capacity of 800 people. It certainly didn’t look this tall from the outside.

After what felt like eternity, running and trying not to trip, John stopped when he reached a metal door. It was the end of it all, we had climbed stairs worth of 10 minutes of our lives and it led to a door, nothing else.

John’s heart was beating rapidly, I could feel his pulse as he held my hand, and he turned to face me. He took both of my hands and looked at me with his big, green, laser eyes. The ones I adored so much.

“Close your eyes,” he said though heavy breathes.

I did as I was told. I felt the urge to take a peak but I pushed it away. Everything turned into darkness but this time, darkness wasn’t scary at all. John was right there beside me, I could feel his presence near. There was nothing that could make me afraid when John was around. Not even darkness. He made me feel valiant.

“You’re ready?”

“I am. Unless we’re jumping off the roof,” I chuckled.

I could sense his smirk as he laughed softly. I felt his movements as he moved closer to the door and opened it. He guided me through a few descending steps, moving slowly so I would be able to follow him without tripping. I felt the wind, it traveled through my hair, and I smiled at the feeling. It was pleasant even though the wind was ice cold.

John let go of my hands and I heard his footsteps moving around me. I felt his presence coming from behind and soon he placed his arms around my waist in a tight embrace. He lowered his head and placed it on my left shoulder.

“Open your eyes,” he whispered.

I opened my eyes. The darkness vanished to give place to a beautiful view. It was nighttime already, but tonight was different. The sky seemed to have been painted by a painter because of its perfection. Stars lit up the sky and lights coming from buildings make me think of New York somehow, the city of lights. A crescent moon hanged right in the middle of the sky and it shone bright, still looking distant. I observed the roof itself and it wasn’t large, but it was big enough to fit a round dining table for two and a couch. How did John manage to get a couch up here, I do not know. But he did, and it all looked cinematographic. The most surprising thing of all was that I couldn’t hear the busy streets or anything at all. Everything was silent like in rural areas where you hear nothing but crickets. But this time, I couldn’t even hear crickets.

“This is so breathtaking,” I whispered, not believing what my eyes were seeing. “It’s beautiful.”

I turned around to look at John but I’ve been talking to myself. He was nowhere in sight. I felt an uneasy feeling in my stomach, afraid something might have happened and he was kidnapped or something worse. I called out his name. No reply.

“John?” My voice grew more, and more suspicious.

I turned around and there he was, as if he had never left. He had a bouquet of flowers in his hands while leaning sideways against the wall, smelling the flowers. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, smelling the air and hoping to smell the flowers too.

Roses, tulips and lavenders.

I knew that smell very well. Its fragrance mixed with John’s smell brought me back memories – that day when we bumped into each other in that little commercial center, he had bought me new bouquets of roses, tulips and lavenders.

I opened my eyes once again and he was slowly walking towards me.

He stretched out his hand, offering the bouquet to me. “I guess this is the proper date we never had,” said John, his voice sincere and charming.

I smiled softly. I knew my cheeks were crimson at this point but I didn’t care. I tucked a strand of hair behind my ear and accepted his flowers, smelling it again.

“After you, “ he gestured his arms towards the table, “miss.”

I bent my knees slightly and lowered my head as a thankful gesture. “Thank you.”

I walked past him and he beat me to the table. He pushed my chair out and waited for me to take a sit. As I did, he pushed my chair in. A true gentleman.

On top of the round, black table there was a takeaway box with the Pizza Hut logo stamped on it. I could smell the pepperoni already; I could sense the cheese that was still melting from being fresh out of the oven.

I laughed.

“What?” he asked, taking a sit on the opposite chair.

“It’s just, funny, you know? How we met. It’s a heck of a coincidence. And also how such little things can bring back pleasant memories,” I smiled gently while admiring the view.

John poured cheap beer into fancy wine glasses. “I’m sorry if this is a cliché. I mean, it’s not easy to do something nice without it becoming a cliché. I tried to adjust a few things to make it look more original,” he smirked, “take the beer for example.”

I laughed at his comment. “You don’t have to apologize. It’s not a cliché. It could never be. It’s too perfect to be one. Plus, you were too original for it to become a cliché. I absolutely love it.”

His eyes lit up with a smile. “I’m glad you do.”

I opened the pizza box and the smell of the pepperonis made me hungry as if I hadn’t eaten for days. I took a slice and John took another. We devoured the first slice while laughing at each other about how funny we ate our food.

“What do you want to talk about?” asked John, he was nervous somehow.

“Well, I don’t care if we talk about absolutely nothing, I just want to talk to you.”

He took a napkin and cleaned his mouth, attempting to seem polite after he ate the pizza as if he were a lion. He smiled, but didn’t reply after that.

“That first time when we went to Pizza Hut, did you find it weird that I wanted the pepperoni flavor?” I asked.

He softly chuckled, “why would you say so?”

I laughed as I remembered the moment. “I don’t know, you seemed surprised or maybe freaked out.”

He threw his head sideways and laughed. “No, no. Not at all,” he paused. “Um, it’s just that Jared had this theory. No one I know likes pepperoni pizza, so he thought that when I found someone who liked it, it would be a ‘sign from above.’”

I thought about his words for a second. I thought mostly about Jared’s theory. “Thinking about it, I don’t actually know anyone who likes pepperoni pizza either.”

I was surprised, my mouth was shaped like an ‘O’ letter but I was more amused than surprised. “That is so cool! I never really thought about it.”

He laughed, not really believing what was happening. “It’s cool that not many people like pepperoni?”

I giggled unexpectedly, “that’s not relevant anyways, I loved the show by the way.

“Thanks. The crowd was pretty great, weren’t they?”

“They were!” I agreed. “Is it normal that you guys have more fan girls rather than boys?”

“It is,” he sadly admitted, “we tried a few times to gain more male fans but it’s kind of hard. Girls like boy bands more than actual boys. Unless you play metal rock, which is not our case.”

He stroked his hand through his hair with a breathtaking smile. I wanted to kiss him right there and then, while he was still busy doing that action. He looked so perfect whenever he did that.

“How many songs do you guys usually play per show?”

“Um, depends. Sometimes 12 songs, sometimes more. It really depends how much time is left and the crowd.”

I smirked, trying to look as good as he did when he smirked. “Talent. I will always remind you of that. You have talent. Nothing else. Just pure talent.”

He smiled, grateful for the compliment. “Which songs did you like?”

“All of them! But I could never get the lyrics right because Garrett distracted me with his constant moving around,” I laughed, “the one that I did manage to learn bits and pieces of the lyrics was Take Me Dancing and I love it. That’s my favorite so far!”

John put down his unfinished slice of pizza and stood up. He stretched out one of his hands, waiting for me to take it.

“Take me dancing?” he asked with the sweetest voice, I almost melted as I heard him.

I couldn’t stop smiling, and I didn’t want to. I stood up and took his hand. He led me to the middle of the roof, pulling me closer to him as his right hand rested on my lower back and his left hand held my hand close to his heart. I placed my head against his chest, holding his hand and his upper arm. Suddenly, I wasn’t so cold anymore and all I could hear was his heart beating wildly against his chest. We slowly swayed from side to side, following a melody that wasn’t there.

“Give me thunder, give me lightning. And I will give you every part of me,”

He started to sing with his god-like voice. I closed my eyes, forgetting about it all and just concentrating on the sound his voice made. I smiled softly to myself. I just wanted this moment to be in pause forever. I felt as if the earth stopped whirling around and the wind opened to let us though with each sway.

“Take me dancing, get me fucked up. Play that guitar and sing,” he mumbled the last sentence through laughter, forgetting how the lyrics went.

I opened my eyes and laughed at the sound of his laughter and his awful mistakes. “Play that old guitar and we will sing.”

He pushed me away a little so he would be able to see my face. I looked up to him.

“I’m surprised you know the lyrics,” he said, amused.

“I told you, it’s my favorite. Besides, I’m a quick learner,” I winked at him before placing my head against his chest again.

He kissed the top of my head and supported his head on top of mine.

“Are you always this perfect?” I asked him, almost falling asleep in his arms.

He paused. I felt as if he was thinking about what to say next. I just gave him time. He didn’t even need to say anything. He didn’t have to speak for the next three centuries. As long as I got to be this close to him every single millisecond, I was happy.

“I love you, Kylie.”

My heart tightened. His words took me by surprise, it did. But I didn’t show. I forced my eyes shut, making sure I was still lucid and not in a distant dream. His words played in the back of my head as if my mind had recorded them. I felt a fuzzy feeling emerging inside of me. A sudden tsunami of happiness reached me and now, I could definitely not stop smiling. My cheeks began to hurt, but I still couldn’t stop smiling.

Seeing that I didn’t reply, John spoke up, afraid he might have scared me. “I know we don’t know each other for long bu-”

“But it doesn’t matter how long I’ve known you,” I interrupted him.

“It doesn’t?” he asked, not following my train of thought.

“No, if you kept me smiling since day one, I know I’m not going to lose you.”

I hugged him a little tighter and he stopped swaying.

“Will you go out with me?” asked John.

“Is that even a question?” I chuckled, looking up at him.

“Not anymore,” he grinned, leaning closer.

He placed his lips on mine and I closed my eyes to embrace darkness once again. This time, I liked it. It was the type of darkness that allowed your heart to feel instead of your eyes to see. I didn’t need to see. I just needed to feel. I needed to feel all the wonderful emotions John gave me. The love and happiness he transferred to me whenever we kissed.

When we ceased our kiss, I had forgotten which planet I was in. I was out of breath, and so was he, but I didn’t mind. I wanted more from where it came from but I sustain edmyself with that for tonight. If I continued, I’d get carried away and this wasn’t an appropriate place for what I had in mind of a cliché.

We were inches apart, and I could see my reflection through his eyes as he looked through my soul.

“I love you, too.”