Never Going Back Again

"Wake up Sleeping Beauty," Valencia laughed as she climbed on Billy's back. He had been up all night. Even after Valencia had fallen asleep. He was up all night pacing around the room while talking on his phone. "Billy," Valencia said as she leaned forward. She placed her hands on his hips and rested her head on his shoulder.

"What time is it Val?" He sighed with his eyes still closed. Valencia looked at the clock next to her bed.

"Eleven-thirty," she said kissing his shoulder. "What time did you get to sleep?"

"Sometime around eight," he said. "What's that smell?"

"I made you breakfast," she said into his neck.

"Breakfast?"

"Yea," Valencia giggled. "You eat don't you?" Billy huffed out a hard laugh. He couldn't remember the last time he had a home cooked meal. He sure as hell couldn't remember the last time someone had cooked one for him. "Your phone keeps ringing," Valencia said. "It's Adalae." Billy opened his eyes and his body stiffened beneath her.

"What makes you think it's Adalae?" He asked.

"I know the number," Valencia said a little harder, trying to match his tone. "Can you please tell me why she's so eager to talk to me?"

"No," Billy said. The way he said it let her know that the decision was final. He had no intentions of letting her talk to her.

"Billy, sooner or later-"

"Val," he said with authority. "Fuckin' shut up about Adalae, all right?" He could feel Valencia recoiled away from him. "I don't want to hear another fuckin' word about her from you." Valencia could've said so many other things about the subject that would set Billy off, but she decided against it. She didn't want to be put in another situation like the one yesterday. No one was around to pull Billy away from her if he couldn't control his temper.

"Okay," Valencia said standing up. "Come and eat, before it gets cold." She turned around and walked towards the kitchen. Her mind was racing with different reasons of why Adalae wanted to talk to her. Surely Adalae had no intentions of speaking to her after Billy had left her at the Four Roses to be with Valencia. Why would she? Unless it was something really important. Something she felt Valencia should know. Something Billy was trying very hard to keep from her.

Valencia put eggs, bacon, and pancakes on a plate with a sigh. It hasn't been twelve hours, she thought. In less than a day her happiness was gone. She was starting to realize there was no taming Billy Darley.

Just then, Billy came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. He rested his head on Valencia's shoulder and kissed her neck softly. Just like that, she was happy again. All he had to do was kiss her and she forgot about being pissed at him. "Shouldn't you be in class right now?" He asked. He let his hands travel up and down her bare legs. She was only wearing a pair of pink boy shorts and a white tee shirt.

"I should," Valencia said. "I thought making you breakfast was far more important." Plus she couldn't go to class with these bruises on her face. No make up could hide them. Valencia turned around and handed him his plate. "Eat," she said. Billy looked down at her face, her chin, and immediately felt a wave of guilt. He stood there for the longest time, holding the plate of food, while he looked down at her damaged face. "You ever have cold pancakes Mr. Darley?" Valencia asked self consciously. She didn't like the way he was looking at her. She knew why he was though. He had just now caught a glimpse of the damage he had done. It was making Valencia feel guilty. Like she was flaunting what he had done to her just to piss him off. "Eat," she said again. She led Billy around the counter and sat down at one of the bar stools she had behind it.

"You're not going to eat?" He asked her.

"I had a bowl of cereal when I woke up," she said.

"What the fuck you make this for then?"

"I made it for you," she said. Billy stared at her for another long minute before looking down at his food and finally eating. "Is it bad?" She asked. Billy shook his head. Valencia felt awkward as she sat there and watched him. "You need anything?" She asked him. Billy cracked a grin as he shook his head again. Why couldn't he be like this all the time? She asked herself. If someone walked in right now and saw them, they wouldn't think Billy walked around with a gun and a gang threatening people. They wouldn't think he gave her those bruises either. Sitting here quietly, he seemed so sweet. He seemed human. He was nothing like the monster he was yesterday. "You got a lot of stuff to do today?" Valencia asked when he was done.

"Always," Billy said.

"Can I... or.. do you think-"

"You should probably stay here," he said. Valencia nodded.

"You mean don't go to the Four Roses," she sighed. Billy nodded. Valencia just shrugged in defeat. "I've got to see my mom anyway. She's probably worried about me." She couldn't help but look up at Billy when she said this.

"What did you tell her yesterday?" Billy asked. Valencia just shrugged again. She knew he was talking about her bruises.

"Nothing about you," she said. Billy let his hand glide down Valencia's chin as she spoke. "I didn't tell her anything."

"I'm so sor-"

"I know," Valencia said pulling away from his hand. "Please stop saying it." Valencia could feel him staring at her. He was making her very self conscious again. "You should probably be getting ready... for whatever it is you have to do today," she said. Billy was going to say something when he heard his phone ringing. He got up , went into Valencia's room, and answered his phone.

"I'm surprised you up, dog," Bodie said from the other end.

"You ready?" Billy asked.

"Yea," he said. "Where do you want me to meet you at?"

"At Val's," Billy said.

"Valencia's?" Bodie asked a little shocked. "You sure you want to talk about this shit over there?" Billy rolled his eyes.

"Just be here in fifteen minutes." He hung up and made his way back to Valencia. She was still sitting on one of the bar stools looking a bit sad. "The boys are coming over," he said. "You might want to go and get dressed." Valencia stood up and frowned.

"Great," she sighed. "Nothing like a visit from a ton of gang members."


Valencia could hear Billy, Bodie, and Joe talking in her living room while she tried to dry her hair. She wanted to hide back in her room until they left. She didn't want them to see her face. She didn't want them to think that she could be so weak. It was inevitable though. She slowly walked out of her room and into the hall. She couldn't help but overhear what they were talking about.

"You can make five hundred easily," Joe said. "I don't know why you're even making such a big deal out of this."

"Yea man," Bodie said. "You can make that in an hour."

"I can get the money," Billy huffed as he brought his cigarette up to his lips. "I'm not worried about that. I'm worried about that bitch trying to get over on me."

"You think she would do that?" Joe asked.

"I don't know," Billy said. "You seen-" Billy immediately stopped talking when he noticed Valencia stepping out of the hall way.

"Hey," she said. It became awfully quiet as Joe and Bodie took in the sight of her face. She walked over to the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of water. "You guys want anything?" Valencia asked. "I've got a ton of food my mom made me." The boys all shook their heads.

"Let's go," Billy said quietly to the guys.

"You're leaving now?" Valencia asked as she walked towards Billy. Billy nodded as he stood up.

"Yea," he said. "We got a lot of shit to do." Valencia nodded and looked behind him at Joe and Bodie. They were both trying their hardest not to look at her.

Valencia placed her hands on Billy's hips and looked up at him. "When do you think you'll be back?" She asked quietly. Hoping the others couldn't hear the desperation in her voice.

"Later," Billy said. He placed both of his hands on her cheeks and kissed her softly on her lips. Valencia practically melted into him as she wrapped her hands around his wrists.

"Unbelievable," Joe said as he shook his head. Valencia felt herself blush as she pulled away from Billy. She looked down at their feet as Billy sighed.

"Why don't you two go wait by the car," he said. Bodie nodded as he pushed Joe out of the apartment.

"Bye, Val," Bodie said. Valencia just kind of waved as the door shut.

Billy looked down at Valencia for a long minute before finally speaking. "I love you," he said. Valencia looked up at him. She bit her lip trying to hide her smile, but it didn't work. She even let out a little giggle.

"I love you too," she said, still trying to hide how happy she was.

She watched Billy grab his coat off of the sofa and quickly put it on, before she walked him to the front door. She could see Bodie and Joe by their car in the parking lot below.
"I should be back before tonight," Billy said as he leaned against the door frame. Valencia nodded. Billy leaned in closer and kissed her just like he had before a few minutes ago. He pulled away from her and sighed. "Please don't do anything stupid today Val," he said. Meaning, don't go looking for Adalae. Valencia nodded again. Billy just stared at her for several seconds before turning away and walking towards his car.


"Seven-fifty," Joe said as he counted the last bills of the money Billy had just made. "What was that, three hours?" He asked.

"Four," Billy said. "It was slow today." Joe handed Billy the money and watched as his brother put it in his jacket pocket. They were in Billy's car, on their way to Adalae's house. Billy had hardly said a word since he picked up Joe. His mind was on Adalae and Valencia. He was worried Valencia would go to Adalae, and he was afraid Adalae would go to Valencia. He had a feeling one of them would go to the other. It was inevitable.
He was going to be found out.

"Hey Billy," Joe said, "Can I ask you something?" Billy didn't answer. He just continued to drive. "Why Val?" He asked. That got Billy's attention. He looked in his brother's direction for a quick second before looking back at the road.

"What?"

"Why Val? As many girls as you've been with, why are you still with her?" He asked. "You can walk down the street and find a decent looking girl with a nice rack. We have done that. Plus, most girls you've been with will put up with your shit. Val doesn't. We all saw that yesterday..." Joe paused and looked over at Billy. "I'm just curious, why her?"

"I trust her," Billy said. "I don't have to worry about her digging in my pockets for drugs or money. She's not like the people that hang around us. She not like Adalae," he said. "She's better. She's good to me," Billy said. "She cooked for me this morning," he said. "She made me breakfast and didn't eat any of it. I asked her why the hell she cooked if she wasn't going to eat. She said, for you," Billy sighed. "She just cooked for me." Now Joe had wished he didn't ask. It was weird hearing his brother talk so freely about something he would surely make fun of Joe for.

"Sorry I asked," Joe said so low Billy didn't hear.

It didn't take long for them to reach Adalae's home after that. What Billy was about to do was something he dreaded, but something he couldn't wait to let out. He would be going back on old promises because of one he made to Valencia. "Stay here, all right?" Billy said to Joe.

"What are you going to tell her Billy?" Joe asked. Billy frowned as he looked down at Joe.

"Just stay in the fucking car," he said. He got quickly got out of the car and slammed the door. He wasn't in the mood to be doing this. He walked as quickly as he could to Adalae's door. He didn't knock on it, or ring the doorbell. When Billy got to her door be beat on it. He slammed his fist down on her door as hard as he could, as many times as he could. He just wanted to get this over with.

"What the hell is your problem?" Adalae asked as she opened the door. Billy could tell by her eyes that she was high. She looked a mess. She didn't look as vibrant as she always did. She looked dull. Faded. Her clothes hung loosely off of her skinny body, her hair was was matted and looked dirty, and she had large dark circles around her eyes.

Billy took out the money from his pocket and shoved it in her hands. "There's the God damn money," Billy snarled. "Take it and leave me the fuck alone." He turned around quickly, trying to head for the stairs, when Adalae reached for his arm.

"Billy I-" She stopped when his hand pushed against her chest, sending her back into the door frame. All the air in her lungs was knocked out of her. For a few seconds she couldn't breathe at all. "Billy," she said with wide eyes.

"Don't fucking come near me," he said pointing at her. "I swear to God Adalae-"

"What's wrong with you?" She asked. Her eyes began to spill over with gumdrop sized tears. "What the fuck did I do?"

"You're fucking up a good thing Adalae," he said shaking his head.

"You mean you and Val?" Adalae asked amazed. "I don't see how you fucking around is my fault!" She yelled. Billy grabbed her arm and pushed her harder against the door frame. Adalae let out a whimper as more tears made their way to her cheeks.

"I gave you the fucking money," Billy growled in her face. "You go get rid of it, and don't come near me or Val again." He let go of her and turned away. He began jogging down the steps, trying to get away from her as fast as he could when he heard her foot steps fast behind his.

"What about what you said Billy?" she cried as she tried to catch up with him. "What about what you told me when Davey died? Did you fucking forget that?" Billy stopped and turned around. She was only a few steps up from him. She stood there looking so helpless. He could see from where he was standing that she was shaking. "Billy," she sighed. "You're going back on what you said for Val?" She said her name like it was disgusting, like a plague. By the way she was talking, you would've never guessed that she and Val were once the best of friends. "Billy," she said again as she took a step forward. Billy could tell she wasn't taking a hint. He walked up to her and pulled his gun from the waistband of his jeans. He heard Adalae let out a sharp breath when she saw the gun in his hand. She took a step back, trying to get away from him, but Billy grabbed a hold of her neck.

"This is the last time I'm going to tell you Adalae," he said as he put the gun to her temple. She let out another cry as she tried to pull away from him. "I don't want to see you around anywhere," he said. "I don't want you no where near the bar, near Val's, or near any of the places we sell at. You see me, you turn the other fucking way." Adalae was sobbing now, her whole body was shaking. The harder Billy pressed the gun into her temple, the more she realized that she wasn't the only one shaking. "Don't bother Joe, or any of the other guys for a fucking fix either," he said. "If I see you at the Four Roses, or hear you've been hassling Val, I will fucking kill you," he fumed. "I won't even think twice." He pushed her away, making her stumble backwards on the steps. "Fucking junkie," he said as he placed his gun back into the waistband of his jeans. He turned around and successfully made his way down the steps without another interruption.

Joe was watching the whole scene from Billy's car. He knew Billy cared a lot for Valencia, but he had no right to do what he just did. As much as they have been through together. Adalae was crushed he could see that from here. This definitely wasn't the first time Billy had pulled his gun on her, but this was the first time he scared the shit out of her. Other times, he'd done it to make a point. This time, he had threatened. Joe looked up at her to see her staring down at him, still on the steps where Billy had left her. She was looking down at Joe with scared, pleading eyes. He looked back at Billy who was slowly making his way to the car.

"Get out," Billy said to him. Joe didn't hesitate to get out of the car. He looked up at Adalae again to see her now squatting on the steps with her arms wrapped around herself. She was still shaking and her sobs could be heard from where Joe was. "You're driving," Billy said as he pushed past him and got in the spot where Joe was a few seconds earlier. Joe looked back at Billy before returning his gaze to Adalae's shaking form. Poor Adalae, he thought. "Hurry up and get in the fucking car!" Billy said as he slammed his fist against the dashboard. Joe hurried to the driver's side of the car and got in.

"You didn't have to do it like that Billy," Joe said as he started the car. "You didn't have to... end it like that."

"Just fucking drive, Joe," Billy groaned.


"Oh shit," Heco said as he looked towards the entrance of the bar. He wasn't surprised by the fact that she was there. What surprised him, and everyone else, were the bruises on her face.

"Fuck man," Spink said as he shook his head. "Even I wouldn't..." He let his sentence trail off when he noticed Billy's frown. He buried his face in his glass and chugged the rest of his drink.

"I thought I told you not to come here," Billy said as Valencia sat down next to him. The way he said it let Valencia know that he wasn't upset, just merely stating the facts.

"I waited for you at home," she said and then shrugged. "I got anxious." Billy pulled her chair closer to his and ran a finger down her jaw. Valencia looked at all the guys. All of them were staring back at her. Staring hard at the dark marks on her face. She quickly looked away from them as she turned towards Billy, who was also staring at her. He looked different. A lot different from when he left her house this morning. Valencia wrapped her arms around his middle as she buried her face into his neck. "You're not mad at me?" She asked him. Billy didn't say anything as he began to run his hand up and down her back.

"What the fuck, man?" Baggy asked to the rest of the guys at the table. They all stared at Billy and Valencia. It had to be the oddest thing they had ever seen. Valencia was here the day before and got humiliated by Billy, now she was here with her arms wrapped around him. And Billy... there was no words for how odd he was acting. Ever since he and Joe walked in the bar, he'd been acting strange. He hasn't spoken a single word, and now he was involved in some serious P.D.A. with a girl he had treated like shit the day before. "Did I fucking miss something?" Baggy asked as he looked at Joe. Joe hasn't given up any details about what had happened with Adalae. Bodie was the only person who had some clue about what had happened.

"You wanna leave?" Billy whispered to Valencia. She nodded and kissed him quickly on his cheek. Billy tossed his keys to Joe, put on his coat and walked out with Valencia without a word to anyone.


When they got to Valencia's house, Billy didn't bother to go to her bedroom. He plopped down on the sofa with a loud huff. Valencia came to his side and sat down next to him. She kicked off her shoes and sat down on her legs. "What's up Billy?" She asked. He didn't say anything as she wrapped her arms around him again. "Did something happen today?" She asked as she began caressingly his cheek with the back of her hand. It was weird, seeing Billy like this. She'd never seen his this down.

"Where did you go today?" He asked. Valencia sighed as she let her hand drop from his face.

"My mother's, like I said," she huffed. Billy nodded. "Where did you go today?" She asked him. Billy cracked a small grin which left as quick as it came. He looked at her, and she had the most concerned look on her face. "What?" she asked him as her eyes searched his face. "What happened today?" Billy didn't bother answering her. Instead, he brought his hand around the back of her neck, letting his fingers play with her hair, and tilted his head forward to kiss her.

Valencia held onto him tighter as she moved her lips with his. "Billy," she sighed as she pulled away. He looked so defeated. She thought about slapping him just to see if he would turn into his old, pissy self. But quickly decided against when she realized how easily it would be for him to get a hold of her. "Tell me, Billy," she said as she placed her head on his shoulder. She gave him a few kisses down his neck before sighing. "You can tell me anything," she said against his neck. "Tell me what happened today." Of course Billy didn't. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her onto his lap. She tried to pull away to look at him, but he wouldn't let her go. He held onto her as tight as he could without depriving her of oxygen. She held onto him just as tight and continued to kiss his neck. "You're scaring me Billy," she said quietly. "Tell me what's up. Is it about Adalae?" Again Billy's body tensed up. Valencia sighed as she kissed his neck once more. It's always about Adalae.