Mistakes

"Where's Luxy?"

I heard her faint giggle from the kitchen. She was playing hide and seek. Ever since Harry had got here, she'd been just peachy. I however, haven't.

"Lo, have you seen Luxy? I can't seem to find her."

"Nope." I popped the 'p' and kept watching a Spongebob rerun that Lux had since abandoned. She was too worried about playing with Harry. Why couldn't she have asked for Niall or Liam? He let out a sigh and shook his head, continuing to search for her. When he found her, her squeals echoed off the walls. That made me grin. She could make anyone smile even at the shittiest times.

"Hey Luxy Lou, its bed time. Let's get you in your jammies and your baby teethers brushed," I spoke, standing up. She pouted and started protesting. "No Lolo, me want up wif Hally."

"No babe, you gotta go to bed. It's past your bedtime," I said. She started crying while still protesting. This time it was Harry's turn to try and reason with her. "Lux, love, its bedtime. You have to get in your jammies and go to sleep. We'll lay down with you too, okay?"

"K." And that was it. She didn't protest. The little shit. I got her old Kiss band t-shirt and black shorts out of her bag, handing them to Harry. He got her changed and I took her in the bathroom to brush her teeth. "Open your mouth like this." I opened my mouth wide and watched her mimick me. I took that as my chance to use her little princess toothbrush and bubblegum flavored toothpaste to brush her teeth.

"Now spit." I pointed to the sink and she spit. "Did it Hally!"

He grinned, leaning against the doorframe. "Good job, love! You're a big girl now!"

She started clapping. "Big girl! Big girl! Me big girl!"

She jumped into my waiting arms, so I carried her to the guest bedroom. She laid in the middle of the bed waiting for Harry and me to lay down with her. I kicked off my shoes and laid on her right side while Harry laid on her left. The covers were pulled over all three of us. The last time I'd been in the same bed with Harry was before he left for New York a few days before the MSG performance. It brought back memories, ones that I cherished and ones that I wanted to forget.

"Want me to sing, Luxy?" Harry said softly. She nodded, looking toward him in the dark. The nightlight was on as was the closet light with the door cracked. She was afraid of the dark. Next thing I know, he started singing sending chills down my spine.

Of all the money that e'er I had
I've spent it in good company
And all the harm that e'er I've done
Alas it was to none but me
And all I've done for want of wit
To memory now I can't recall
So fill to me the parting glass
Good night and joy be with you all

Of all the comrades that e'er I had
They are sorry for my going away
And all the sweethearts that e'er I had
They would wish me one more day to stay
But since it falls unto my lot
That I should rise and you should not
I'll gently rise and I'll softly call
Good night and joy be with you all

A man may drink and not be drunk
A man may fight and not be slain
A man may court a pretty girl
And perhaps be welcomed back again
But since it has so ought to be
By a time to rise and a time to fall
Come fill to me the parting glass
Good night and joy be with you all
Good night and joy be with you all

"She's out," he whispered. My eyes drooped shut and my breathing slowed down. "Lo?" The bed shifted making me roll slightly into Lux. "Lo?"

The last thing I heard before I fell asleep was, "I'm sorry, Lo. For everything."


This wasn't how I wanted to wake up. My arm thrown over Lux and resting on Harry's hip. His arm draped over me, his hand grazing the skin over my spine where my shirt had rode up. Our legs tangled together. If made me want to roll away from him, get as far away as I could. But I didn't. I stayed right there.

My phone vibrated on the nightstand, so I picked it up and answered. "'Ello?" I murmured.

"Hey babe! Why are you whispering?" Jimmy answered. My eyes glanced over at the two sleeping figures beside me. "Lux is sleeping."

"Oh okay. Well I just wanted to call and tell you I'm gonna be here for another week or two. I'll tell you more later. Go back to sleep."

Aw. I don't want him to stay in Australia longer. I pouted. "Okay. Bye babe."

"Bye babe. Talk to you later." I hung up and put the phone back on the nightstand. "Was that your boyfriend?"

I almost shit my pants. I didn't know he was awake. Jesus. "Go back to sleep," I stated. "We aren't talking about this."

He sighed. "When can we talk about it? I want to know what's so good about him."

God. Did he really have to do this right now? When Lux was sleeping no less. It was starting to piss me off. And when I got pissed it wasn't pretty. He knew that. He also knew how to push my buttons. But now wasn't the time or place.

"Just drop it, Harry." With that said, I rolled over making his arm fall to the mattress with a soft thud. The wall was the last thing I saw before I fell asleep again.


"How's my love bug?" Lou questioned. Glancing over, I watched her poke Harry's dimples. "She's good. Harry's keeping her occupied," I answered.

"Woah, wait. He's at your place? Are you under the influence of any drugs or alcohol? Should I call Louis?"

I rolled my eyes. "Yes. No. And no. One word behind it all; Lux."

"Ahhhh. Okay. That explains it," she spoke. "I'm still gonna call Louis. I want him to supervise and make sure no one brutally murders anyone in front of my precious baby girl."

That made me chuckle. "Whatever helps you sleep at night, Lou."

We said our goodbyes after talking for a few more minutes. Lux was now sitting beside Harry and watching cartoons. He was messing on his phone probably texting his girlfriend. It made me want to roll my eyes and also maybe possibly smash his phone into little pieces. Possibly.

"You're Mum and Dad should be home in the next few days, Lux," I stated. "Your Poppy is already starting to feel better."

She didn't even move. She didn't even blink. She just kept watching cartoons. "If you need me to take her for a day or two, I will," Harry said, finally looking up from his phone.

Shaking my head, I said, "Lou asked me to watch her. I'm sure we'll be fine." Bitchy; that was the word to describe my tone.

I didn't want Harry taking her. I was perfectly fine taking care of her by myself. Him saying that made me feel like he didn't think I could take care of her. I was eighteen for god sake. Not like I hadn't taken care of her before. It just chapped my ass.

"Why are you acting that way?" He asked. "I don't understand how you can still be so bitter when you've clearly moved on."

That made me scoff. Of course he would ask me that. How daft was he? Did the fame go to his head? "Don't act like you don't know," I replied. "I'm acting this way because of you. What you did to me can really screw a person up. If you were in my shoes, you'd understand, but you never will because you'll always be the cheater, not the victim."

He was getting mad. I could tell. He was clenching his jaw and drumming his fingers on his knee. He always told me he did that so he didn't haul off and punch someone.

"You wouldn't understand," he spoke eerily calm. A dark chuckle left my lips. "You're right, I don't. So why don't you explain it to me."

He opened his mouth but was cut off by my phone ringing.

Looking for the sun that Neil Young hung,
After the gold rush of 1971
I just found out a ghost left town—

"'Ello?"

"I love you like one of my sisters, so when I say this just remember that I love you that much, yeah? Stay away from Harry. He's not good for you. I know what happened in New York and why he did it. Just... don't give in to him."

What? What is he talking about? "What are you going on about, Louis? What happened?"

"It's not my place to tell you. Just listen to me, yeah?"

"How am I supposed to listen to you when I don't know what's going on. I want to know what happened, god dammit!"

He sighed. "He'll tell you when he's ready."

That made me get a little irritated. I was getting tears in my eyes meaning I was well on my way to blowing up. When I got beyond mad, I cried and I hated it. "Just tell me, Louis! I don't want to wait until he's ready to tell me! I want to know right fucking now!" My voice cracked at the end making me mentally scold myself. Shit. With the way Harry was looking at me I knew he knew what Louis and I were talking about.

"No, Logy. I'm not going to tell you. It's not my place." I hung up. I didn't even want to hear Louis's voice anymore. I didn't even want to be in the same room as Harry. He seemed to be the root of all my problems nowadays. Maybe it's a sign I need to rid myself of him fully and completely. The door to my bedroom was slammed shut and locked before Harry knew what I was doing. Hell, I didn't even know what I was doing. My mind was a jumble of shit. My vision was a big blurry blob. My heart was a broken, scarred, trashed mess.

I was just a shell of the person I used to be. And all because of a boy. A stupid boy.

Your heart is a token, it's not a toy, but if you want it broken, give it to a boy.


"Go the fuck away," I croaked.

Another knock sounded on the door. "Logan, come on babe."

There he goes again. Babe. I'm not his babe. Not anymore. He ruined it. Why is he doing this? "Why are you doing this? Why won't you just listen to me?"

I heard him sigh and then the little pitter patter of feet. Soon after, a few light knocks sounded. "Lolo?" Lord. I pawed at my eyes and sniffed. It did no good though. My nose was so stopped up that I couldn't even breathe out of it. Unlocking and opening up the door, I saw Harry leaning against the wall opposite the door and Lux standing there with her stuffed giraffe under her arm.

"Hey pretty girl," I cooed, crouching down. "What's up?"

She looked at me with those big blue eyes of hers and furrowed her brows. "You cwy?"

I nodded. "Yeah, love, I cry," I mumbled. "But I'm all good now."

She stared up at me for a few seconds before stepping forward and wrapping her tiny, slightly chubby arms around my neck. It made tears sting the corner of my eyes. "Lub you Lolo. You alls better," she whispered.

"Love you too, Lux," I whispered, getting choked up. "I-I'm all be-better."

She pulled away quickly and frowned. "You no cwy. Hally, Lolo no cwy. Kiss it better!"

Shaking my head, I stood up with her in my arms. "I'm fine, Luxy, really. Now hows about we watch TV?"

Now it was her turn to shake her head. "Hally kiss it better." She looked at Harry and gave him her best mad face. "Kiss it better, Hally. Now!" She jumped out of my arms onto the bed and stood with her hands on her hips, staring at Harry with the most adorable look on her face. He gave in quicker then he had any other time. She was getting better at having him wrapped around her finger.

He came over to me, stopping an inch or so away from me. His hands slowly came up and wiped away my tears, cupping my face. His thumb rubbed over my lips a few times before he leaned in and placed his lips on the corner of my mouth. His lips lingered a little too long before he pulled away and looked to the toddler on the bed. "There. I kissed it better. Now I gotta go." And with that said, he walked out.

How the hell can he do that and just walk out? What the hell?