When We're Dead
1/1
L
Loyalty, love, lost, lonely, lie, life.
And Light.
Funny how a single word can completely twist your mind and make you feel lost.
I killed him.
And I don't regret it.
He died in my arms, I watched his eyes closing slowly, I felt when his thorax stopped moving, I heard the silence after his heart stopped beating.
It is honourable to make a man happy on his moment of death.
So I did.
I smiled.
But what it meant? Everything, this smile of mine meant that, the cat had caught the mice, that after a long and a hard work, he was right.
My smiled meant that I was the one to blame, like he was so sure of, since the beginning.
Might I add, I wasn't simply smiling to make him happy.
I was truly uncommonly happy.
He was the only rock that was blocking my way, the only mind I couldn't read, the only obstacle, and the only thing I feared.
And now he was dead.
But this was quite long ago, later on I found out that he had other tricks up it's sleeves.
He had lost his Queen, but he still had both of his horses, while I had none, and even when he was dead, all of that story was like a big game of chess. He never needed to be alive to keep playing.
We were both sickly playing it, waiting to it's end, waiting for the check mate.
And I made a huge mistake.
I thought that the Queen was the King.
And in the end, he won.
Now I lie here, dying, bleeding, looking at him.
"Hello Light" he says.
I don't answer, I feel my blood filling my throat.
"I see you can feel your life slipping away from your mortal body, and in the end, I was right, you were the killer" he said.
Oh God, I want to kill him again.
"I know you hate me, Light, and I know you would kill me again if you could, I am not here to increase your hate on the moment of your death, oh no, I came here to confess" he said.
Funny, I could see his skinny body, but his face was hidden.
Another funny thing, I didn't bother to look at the name Remu wrote in the Death Note.
"I can read your thoughts, Light, I am afraid I don't know what my name is anymore." he stated "I've been anonymous for a lot of time, there are registers of mine in any possible name on this planet, my parents gave me a name, but is this name the one who truly represents you? I believe my name is not my birth name anymore, maybe it never was, my name is L, L for Love".
He laughed as I felt my heart beat slower.
"Light, as I was saying, you may hate me now and on, you were lying when you said you were my friend, and while you had the memory of being Kira, all you wanted was to see me dead. But when you were a fighter of justice? When you were not Kira, did you love me back then? I know you can't speak, and if you could, you'd deny it, but I loved you when you were a murderer, and I loved you when you were innocent, thank you for letting me know that you are Kira, we won't meet on the other side, I know, but let me believe that you once loved me, and I'll let you believe that you won the game"
His face appeared to me, I looked inside those deep and dark wholes he called eyes, I felt my soul being wrapped by his darkness.
And then I looked beyond.
Deep inside his black eyes, there was light.
Loyalty, love, lost, lonely, lie, life.
And Light.
Funny how a single word can completely twist your mind and make you feel lost.
I killed him.
And I don't regret it.
He died in my arms, I watched his eyes closing slowly, I felt when his thorax stopped moving, I heard the silence after his heart stopped beating.
It is honourable to make a man happy on his moment of death.
So I did.
I smiled.
But what it meant? Everything, this smile of mine meant that, the cat had caught the mice, that after a long and a hard work, he was right.
My smiled meant that I was the one to blame, like he was so sure of, since the beginning.
Might I add, I wasn't simply smiling to make him happy.
I was truly uncommonly happy.
He was the only rock that was blocking my way, the only mind I couldn't read, the only obstacle, and the only thing I feared.
And now he was dead.
But this was quite long ago, later on I found out that he had other tricks up it's sleeves.
He had lost his Queen, but he still had both of his horses, while I had none, and even when he was dead, all of that story was like a big game of chess. He never needed to be alive to keep playing.
We were both sickly playing it, waiting to it's end, waiting for the check mate.
And I made a huge mistake.
I thought that the Queen was the King.
And in the end, he won.
Now I lie here, dying, bleeding, looking at him.
"Hello Light" he says.
I don't answer, I feel my blood filling my throat.
"I see you can feel your life slipping away from your mortal body, and in the end, I was right, you were the killer" he said.
Oh God, I want to kill him again.
"I know you hate me, Light, and I know you would kill me again if you could, I am not here to increase your hate on the moment of your death, oh no, I came here to confess" he said.
Funny, I could see his skinny body, but his face was hidden.
Another funny thing, I didn't bother to look at the name Remu wrote in the Death Note.
"I can read your thoughts, Light, I am afraid I don't know what my name is anymore." he stated "I've been anonymous for a lot of time, there are registers of mine in any possible name on this planet, my parents gave me a name, but is this name the one who truly represents you? I believe my name is not my birth name anymore, maybe it never was, my name is L, L for Love".
He laughed as I felt my heart beat slower.
"Light, as I was saying, you may hate me now and on, you were lying when you said you were my friend, and while you had the memory of being Kira, all you wanted was to see me dead. But when you were a fighter of justice? When you were not Kira, did you love me back then? I know you can't speak, and if you could, you'd deny it, but I loved you when you were a murderer, and I loved you when you were innocent, thank you for letting me know that you are Kira, we won't meet on the other side, I know, but let me believe that you once loved me, and I'll let you believe that you won the game"
His face appeared to me, I looked inside those deep and dark wholes he called eyes, I felt my soul being wrapped by his darkness.
And then I looked beyond.
Deep inside his black eyes, there was light.