Skinny Love

Zayn Malik Missing

One Direction Member Lost

Identifying Bodies in Paris. Where is Zayn Malik?

Zayn May be Missing from a Little more than Twitter.

FOUND: Zayn Javadd Malik

Four weeks.

Four fucking, mind numbing weeks.

Jessica sat cradled in her bed, not eating, not speaking, not living. She thought that she actually lost Zayn. The feeling in her heart was indescribable. It was all her fault.

She left Zayn.

She let the world get to her.

She was the reason he was in Paris.

She was the reason he got shot.

The immense cloud of guilt that inhabited in her mind sent her into a wave of depression. Jessica needed to hear his voice, even if it was for one last time. She needed to hear him whisper ‘Jess’ to her in his husky, Bradford accent. Jessica wandered through her memories of him, because that was all that she had left of him. What they had was worth first place and gold, but she gave it all away. She felt regret tingle in the depths of her heart and she knew there was no reason for her to even live anymore. Zayn’s family hated her, his fans hated her, and he probably hated her that day. To be honest, she hated herself.

Jeremiah, her assistant, was the man keeping her alive. He tried continuously to get her to stay optimistic as she had been in her better days. He saw the many headlines that clutched his heart. He was the one that felt undeniably guilty, but he never told Jessica that. He couldn’t find the time to tell her that he was the one to tell Zayn of their whereabouts when she repeatedly told him not to.

It dawned on him then that there were two guilty fashionistas in the Chanel fashion house.

It was the twenty ninth day that he was holding Jessica as she sat like a brick; emotionless. There was a frantic knock at the door and her eyes stayed dull and lifeless as Jer got up to answer it. A frantic Liam Payne came running through the door in an attempt to find her.

“Jessica! Jessie! JESSICA!!!”

He found her cradled in her cashmere tracksuit. She wouldn’t be caught dead in velour, even in her time of mourning.

“He’s alive, Jess! He’s alive.”

The glimmer in her eyes was back, the hope was restored. Liam just picked her up as she cried silently into his shoulder. She grabbed the newspaper from him and got Zayn’s whereabouts.

“How is he, Liam?”

“There was water in his lungs that they’ve flushed out, but they’re trying to fix his punctured kidney. He lost a lot of blood, but they think he’ll be alright.”

“Do you think he’s going to hate me?”

“They found him holding onto the ring.”

She looked up at him, confused.

“Who do you think he called before he did it?”

“I’m going to get changed. The hospital is twenty minutes from here.”

The smile in her heart was bigger than the guilt behind it. She wanted to believe that he wouldn’t hate her, but this whole situation was her fault. She took a quick shower and dawned a pair of gunmetal leggings, black sweater, cream scarf, and leopard Jeffery Campbell Lita boots.

How dare she be unfashionable as Zayn wakes up to her?

For the first time in for weeks, she made a sassy remark in her head and smiled. Her face forbade any sense of happiness until they were sure of Zayn’s condition. Zayn was going to be alright and she knew what a terrible, irrational decision that she made. The way she loved Zayn was unfathomable and in that moment, she just hoped that he would feel the same way.

The arrival to the hospital was gracefully quiet, mostly thinking about little Malik. His team of nurses had him in a medically induced coma, so he wouldn’t feel as much pain when his body healed itself after surgery. She was thankful for that, more than thankful to know he was okay. The nurses described everything to her and how they found him. They told her how they had to actually pry the ring out of his hand while he was slightly conscious. It made her smile as they returned the ring to her, but it made her wonder what happened to him that night.

She stayed in his private suite for a week straight, unable to leave his side. Visiting hours was a term that didn’t apply to her; she couldn’t leave even if she wanted to. She owed him that much. She stayed by his side and held his hand as she studied his face. The scrapes on his face, the bandages on his side, the way his eyes stayed shut; somehow, he was still so angelic. He was her angel and she appreciated his efforts to love her no matter what.

Yaser dropped by the third day that she was there and apologized for his actions. She repeatedly told him that she understood and that she got where he was coming form, but he felt as if it wasn’t an excuse. He cried to Allah, as he blamed himself for his son’s damage. He had tears streaming down his face as he relived the day of Zayn screaming at him. He didn’t want his son to leave Earth with hate for him in his heart. Jessica rubbed Yaser’s back as he cried. She told him that everything will be okay and it wasn’t his fault. It was just a lot of bad situations that led him at the wrong place at the wrong time.

She sat there telling herself that no one was really to blame. It was just a bad time for all of the people involved. Yaser took that moment in her presence to tell her that he honestly couldn’t see Zayn without her. She helped him so much in his times of need and she was always by his side. She was so grateful to receive the acceptance that she fished for. For over a year, she wanted Yaser to like her and it felt as if a weight was lifted off of her shoulders.

When Yaser left, he spoke softly to her.

“Take care of him, Jess.”

She nodded with a smile, the way that he said her name evoked emotion in her heart. He spoke the same way that Zayn did. It was the closest that she got to hearing his voice and it made her smile with every inch of her body. The resemblance was uncanny with the two of them. It was truly a time to be happy in the room, even when Yaser left she was sappy with love in her heart.

Four days after the encounter, she looked upon Zayn’s face. His scars healed and he was in his last days of his medically induced coma. She waited patiently as the medicine started to wear off. He wasn’t active, but he could hear the things around him. It would only be a matter of hours until he could speak to her again. She was in desperate need to apologize to him and help him understand that she really did love him.

“I love you, Zayn Malik.”

She rubbed the back of her hand against his cheek as she smiled gracefully at his face that was returning to its natural color more and more every day.

“I love you, too.”