Beetlejuice and Lydia

There was a small sidewalk running through the cemetery, that traveled out passed the gate and kept on winding somewhere to the left. We kept on walking until a tree appeared near the end of it. Around the top of the tree around the branches it looked like something was swaying--actually, quite a few somethings--even with the lack of wind.

"Hangman's Tree." Beetlejuice said as we approached. A simple wooden sign that was stuck into the ground beneath the tree announced it just as that. Hundreds of bodies were swaying in the invisible wind, all by their necks off of this ginormous tree.

"Hey Marv! How's it hangin'?" Beetlejuice called up. A blond man hanging on one of the lower limbs looked down at us as he swayed. He had on tattered clothes from around the turn of the century, buy the looks of it. Recognizing Beetlejuice, he flipped him the bird as he continued to swing, causing Beetlejuice to cackle at him evilly.

"I told you. Didn't I tell you? It was a bad bet. Oh well. Frannez would have probably killed you for sleeping with his old lady when you got back, anyways." Beetlejuice continued to banter him. I was now grabbing Beetlejuice by the arm and dragging him away from the tree, sending an apologetic look over my shoulder.

"Stop taunting people. Do you want to prove your case today or not?" I scolded him.

"Doesn't really matter to me, Babe." He said, patting my hand that was still locked around his arm before suddenly realizing something. "Damn it! We should have just checked out the mausoleum. Those zombies probably would have another way of transportation besides the longer route."

"Which is?"

"We continue to walk straight from Hangman's Tree," He explained "And then we continue on until we get to a lake. Just don't get too close to the lake. Those girls are wild in there, and would love to drag me down with you. From there we turn right, towards a group of trees. Continue to walk there for a while (just be careful, so nothing pecks your eyes out). There will be signs in the middle of the road, and one will point us to, hopefully, a courthouse building. I did not come all this friggin' way just to end up getting someone saying to me 'oh sorry, you need to go to the main lobby'."

"What's the main lobby?" I asked.

"It's where all of the dead people go when they're freshly dead, or when they're waiting to talk to their case worker. It's very tedious, and way too much paperwork. Actually, it's a whole lot easier for people who have permanent residence in your world somewhere, because then they practically click their heels three times and they get there." He continued to say. Everything he was saying fascinated me. So there was different places in the afterlife? It's not all right here?

Soon we came across the lake. Then we headed towards the throng of trees, where I got attacked by bats and Beetlejuice had to save me, by either hitting them away or eating them.

"That is disgusting." I said, cringing and turning my head away from Betelguese as he chowed down on a bat.

"What? It's good food and a good source of vitamins. And I'm starving. Are you sure you don't want any?" He said, shoving the remainder of the bat in my face. I pushed at his arm, covering my mouth so I wouldn't throw up. He cackled evilly.

"Woah, hey look! There's the signs!" He said, pointing to something up ahead. As we grew closer I realized that it was a bunch of signs nailed onto a wooden stake.

"Astral Villa, The Boneyard, Casper's Cavern, Courthouse!" Beetlejuice read off the signs out loud, and pointed to the left. "This way."

The left sloped down past the sight of trees, downwards to a small town.

"See that building over there? The one that's sticking up the most out of all of the little ones?" Beetlejuice pointed to some type of brownish blur at the edge of the town.

"I think so."

"That's the courthouse. That's where we have to go." He said before he started walking down the hill. We walked down the hill into the town. Despite the long walk through the town, my feet didn't hurt at all. Of course, it's probably because I was artificially dead in a way. I wasn't dead, but I was here in the afterlife, walking alongside Beetlejuice. People walked by, almost all of them being pale and sickly looking. Some were dressed up in clothing that was eras ago, some carrying things in their arms. Beetlejuice kept on getting looks from the people as we walked by, but he kept his head forward, and I tried my hardest to do the same.

The courthouse reminded me of some type of old cathedral, with large doors and candles in some of the front windows on the floor. Large birdlike things were circling over top of it in the air as we gained closer, and I had a sudden idea that maybe one of them was going to swoop down and carry one of us off. The doors swung open automatically as we walked up the steps, probably already expecting the infamous Beetlejuice and his unknown companion.

The main room was large, with many office desks positioned around the room. Doors lined the walls, leading to different places around the large cathedral. Beetlejuice cut in front of me and walked towards the back of the room, to desk number 74. A blond woman who's bones protruded out at odd angles from underneath her navy blue dress looked up at us.

"I'm here to see Judge Valence Deveroa about a meeting of becoming a permanent residence here in the Afterlife." He said to the woman.

"Name?" She asked him in a weak voice. Beetlejuice scoffed.

"What? Are you kidding me? You don't know who I am?" Beetlejuice said incrediously.

"Name please?" The woman asked him again.

"Holy shit. Babe, she doesn't know my name!" Beetlejuice said, turning to me. "Come on. I'm a bio-exorcist. How the fuck can't you tell who I am?" I grabbed his arm to calm him down. He turned to look at me.

"Calm down." I told him.

"Right, right. Sorry." He said, wiping my arm away."Beetlejuice." The woman shifted around papers on her desk slowly before reaching into a drawer on the left hand side, in search of something. She pulled out a stack of cards, and began to go through them one by one. Beetlejuice looked up at the ceiling and began to tap his foot.

"Be patient." I snapped at him.

"She's going to take forever." He replied.

"So? We're here for a while."

"For a while can be eternity here."

"Whatever." I said, looking back at this woman. She pulled out Beetlejuice's card and gave it to him.

"Courtroom 173, you're case 290." She said. Beetlejuice was already walking off. Damn. I know he wasn't that excited.