Snitch

“What did you say?” I asked softly, for a moment I wondered had he heard me.
“I said that I’ve always found you very attractive. I think you’re beautiful. C’mere for a minute.” He motioned with his hand for me to come to him, speaking in such a serious tone that I felt like an idiot if I didn’t obey.
“Are you sure you’re saying this about me?” I asked as I got up and started to make my way towards the back of the bus, towards him, “You know, nobody’s ever said that to me before.”
“I can tell. I see how you won’t look at me as I’m telling you this.” He commented when I was standing next to him.
I did have my eyes cast down at the floor the entire time I made my way back here. When I still wouldn’t look at him, I felt him placed a finger under my chin, and gently tilt my head so I could look at him. I had always thought that Barto was gorgeous, though I was hardly the only girl who thought this I knew I was probably the only girl on campus that would actively pursue him. Most of the girls on campus, like Iggi, wanted a guy who screamed danger or had a quality of ruggedness to them. Something that said aggression, something where you could tell their testosterone was in full swing. Not that Barto was some kind of softy, he was tall with broad shoulders, a strong jaw line, and was one of the few guys who could grow a full beard, and it would look nice on him. It was just he had an all around wholesomeness to him that I knew for a fact made a girl friend zone. He was the type that was cute but it would probably prove awkward to try to make anything romantic with him because it would be too easy to see him as if he was your sibling. I didn’t see him as some brotherly type, I couldn’t even if I wanted too. I never understood why but things always felt different when it came to my crush on Barto. I knew I wouldn’t cheat on him like I did with my ex. I wouldn’t want to be with another guy if I had him holding my hand, kissing me, calling me his girlfriend. Somehow, I knew I would want everything to be different if I ever had the inkling of a chance with Barto.
“I think you’re beautiful.” He told me again, a deep sincerity in those big, brown eyes of his.
That’s when his big, nut brown hands grabbed hold of my hips and pulled me into the seat next him.
“You wanna do something for me beautiful girl? Something that will make me feel good?” he asked, his voice breathy.
I don’t know if it was because of how fast everything was going or maybe his tone was rubbing off on me. Either way I noticed that my breathing started to heavier too. He pulled me close to him, so much so that air couldn’t come between us at that point. It felt nice being that close up to him. Possibly the nicest feeling I ever had in my life. Encircling one arm around my middle, his other hand grabbed one of mine’s and placed it on the crotch of his pants where I could feel his huge bulge against my palm.
“So do you want to? You want to make me feel good, Trizda?” he asked again, this time whispering it in my ear.
Without hesitation, I nodded my head unable to talk as I think my voice got stuck in my throat. Next thing I know, everything was just sounds and feelings as I closed my eyes and enjoyed what was happening here. There was no one else on the bus, just us. Me and Barto just like only a few seconds earlier how we locked eyes and that was it. It was just the two of us. First I heard his zipper, then I felt a thick rod in my palm that I grasped firmly but still gentle enough not to hurt him, and started pumping like crazy. In response to my touch, his arm tightened around me and he started breathing heavier and faster as I went on. The tightening started turning into squeezing and I was lost in the moment. It was magic. Everything would be perfect now if he would just kiss me. All I wanted was a simple kiss, I could die the next moment and be absolutely happy. It would have been pure magic. Out of all the crap that happened to me in my life, a lot I felt I brought on myself, this was probably a crowning moment saying that maybe things won’t always be this way for me. That I was capable of experiencing true magic.
Next thing I know, just as suddenly as it started, it was over as I felt a liquid warmth on my hands and spill onto my right leg. After that, everything was silent as Barto pulled out some napkins from his jacket pocket and started wiping everything up, at least what he could get. My leg was a lost cause, so he gave up quickly, then excusing himself so he could get up he walked to the front of the bus, threw the soiled napkins in the trash holder up front and then exited off the bus. Just like, that I was alone again. Yet despite his sudden departure I felt like a cloud on the inside. Light, airy, and high where no one could touch me, just for that period, I forgot about Iggi, Ciro, and telling somebody about their illegal drinking. I forgot all the bad things that seemed to follow me wherever I went. The only thing in my mind was playing over what had happened with Barto and what it could possibly mean and what it could lead to.

I had moved from the back to the front of the bus by the time everyone was coming back from the festival and piling on. More than a few of the other students came stumbling on, their eyes dilated with a case of the giggles that wouldn’t stop. One was a couple by the names of Harmony and Hank. Both were the most country people you could meet with thick accents and a love of wearing forest camouflage everywhere they went. Another was a black guy who looked way older than his twenty years. In the midst of the oncoming crowd I saw Barto. I went to say something to him, but there was something about the expression on his face that made me stop. Was it the way he stared straight ahead like his head was stuck that way? Was it the hard, sternly blank expression on his face? Either way I thought better against calling out to him. I watched as he made his way towards the near back of the bus. Just then, the lovely couple of Ciro and Iggi came on the bus. Ciro was all but falling over himself as he grabbed onto Iggi from behind and started walking with her stride for stride like this. Besides the big, goofy smile on her full lips, Iggi didn’t seem as impaired as him.
A stab of jealousy instantly entered my heart as she called out to Barto and sat in the seat in front of him. I bet if she knew anything about what had just happened with Barto and me, she wouldn’t want to be around him anymore. She looked like one of those types. All about appearances, I happened to notice once that everybody she even graced with her time and presence were all part of the really good looking crowd. She never even acknowledged people who wasn’t considered attractive by the general population.
As she was turned around, her knees in the seat so she could talk to Barto, Ciro started laying hearty slaps on her ample ass that appeared to really annoy her.
“Stop it!” she said swatting his huge hand away. “Cut it out, perv.”
“Perv though?” Ciro said kissing his teeth, “What makes me a perv? This is mine’s, isn’t it?” he said smacking hard again, this grabbing onto a big chunk of it.
Iggi was quiet but a devious smirk quirked up the corner of her mouth. At that Ciro placed a big, wet kiss on her. When he came up for air, he turned and his hazel eyes caught me looking onto his PDA. Ciro was good-looking but he wasn’t straight handsome like say Barto was. Ciro was straight off the island Latino who epitomized the “thugged out” mentality. Yet due to his light-skin, hazel eyes, and light, crew cut sandy colored hair, it was very easy for him to be mistaken as one of those white boys trying to be “down” or a “wigger” as they’re mostly called. He was short for a guy, barely a head taller than Iggi who was barely pushing past five feet, and had a slight slouch to his walk. His shoulders were very broad though, broader than Barto who was taller than him by at least a full foot and he had a very muscular chest and rippling arms which he got from being such a workout fanatic. What messed up his looks though was he had a lazy eye, though it was hard to notice unless you were really looking at it, and he had a mild case of acne with scars marring his face. In this day and age where pretty boys seemed to be the thing Ciro was too rugged and displayed too many flaws to be what one could consider GQ status.
When he looked up and saw me staring he shouted out, “Take a picture, it’ll last longer.” He did his best to impersonate what I guess was an air-headed white girl. After he let out a small chuckle at his own joke, he continued in his regular voice, “Nah but seriously, why you looking so hard at us for, huh? What you want a piece of this?” at that he started jiggling Iggi’s ass.
This caused her to turn around and deliver a sharp jab to his arm.
“I was just saying that the fat bitch wants some of that too. I don’t think she wants it in the same way I do though. I think she really wants to eat you.” He laughed loudly, earning him some chuckles from those around him who had heard.
I felt my face heat up as the embarrassment that I’ve been getting put through for a majority of my life started to set in all too familiarly again. They were ruining everything. I was just on cloud nine a few minutes earlier and now they were all bringing me down back to this hellish earth. I was never one to take bullying or teasing sitting down so I started speaking up for myself. Even if it just eggs them on and makes things worse for me on my part.
“Ha ha, very funny. Your fat jokes are so original.” I countered, which caused to other students to start going “oooohhhh” and the like.
“Yo, shut that fat ass up, you bitch!” he shot back, though there was a smile on his face I could tell that he was seizing to launch a verbal assault on me if I didn’t just take this quietly.
However, I chose not to. I wasn’t going to let him ruin my afterglow of my moment with Barto just because he was somewhat drunk and probably just looking to cause trouble with an easy target.
“I know I’m a big and beautiful woman and you’re just intimidated by me.” I tried to sound confident in myself but I knew something gave away to how bad he was making me feel.
Once I sad this there was an eruption of condescending laughter from mostly everyone on the bus. This caused my embarrassment to slowly fade into anger. They were ruining it for me, they were ruining the magic. In the midst of all of this I looked for Barto. At this point, Iggi had turned around in her seat and seemed to be trying to get Ciro to sit down with her as he had gotten to his feet. Behind them I saw Barto had his head hung low. He wouldn’t even look up. They were embarrassing me in front of Barto, especially after what we had just shared! Bastards, all of them!!
“Big and beautiful, yeah. To a fucking rhino!” Ciro shouted adding an obnoxious sound at the end that made people laugh even harder at his evilness.
“Nah man, you need something bigger than a rhino. How about a whale?!” suggested another student, I guess to join on the ripping into me session that seemed to be keeping everyone entertained at this point.
“She does look like some big ass, albino whale, don’t she?” shouted another black girl from the back. She was the old roommate that I had the door problem with.
“Yo, remember when Trigger said that her ankles rub together when she walks? That shit had me so weak.” Laughed another.
At this point I turned around in my seat and just stared ahead. I tried my hardest to fight back the tears that were threatening to fall. Damn them, I hated them all. Why couldn’t they just leave me alone just this once? It was all because Ciro had to say something to me. He had to get the ball rolling. That’s usually how it is with me, one person would start the hurtful jeers, and the others would follow like fucking sheep. Things started to settle down a bit as our Indonesian bus driver finally got back on and started up the bus.
They were going to pay for this. They were going to pay for taking away my magic. I might have not been able to do something directly, like hurt them with nasty joke, but I would get them back. All I had to do was play the waiting game until we got back on campus.