Picking Up the Pieces

It was nearing six o’clock, and Tony hadn’t spoken to me since....yeah....which had happened around noon. I hadn’t moved from my bunk since, just lying there pathetically wallowing in self pity.

That was such a stupid idea, getting Tony jealous. And even though it was Luke’s idea, I had agreed to it, so I still felt awful.

I sighed heavily and flipped over in my bunk so I was facing the hallway. The curtain was closed, so I couldn’t see anything, but I could still hear a conversation coming from the front of the bus.

“What the fuck, dude?” It was Tony.

“What?!” I voice replied. Luke.

“You know damn well what I’m talking about,” Tony growled. “You know how I feel about Zoe! You can’t just go kissing her!”

“She kissed me!” Luke yelled back. “I’m not to blame here.”

“Sure, I bet she did,” Tony snorted.

Another voice joined them. “What the hell is going on, you guys? Who’s kissing who?” it yelled. Shane.

“This little bastard was kissing Zoe!” Tony yelled.

“So what if I was? You guys aren’t even together!” Luke retorted. “Why are you getting so butthurt about this? She’s not even your girlfriend!”

“Not yet! I kissed her first, I’ve known her longer, she’s mine!” Tony argued.

“You act like she’s your fucking property, Tony! How do you think she feels, huh? You kiss her like you want her and then act like nothing happened! Quit leading her on!!”

“I’m not leading her on okay?” Tony yelled. “I just....I want to know that she feels the same way, alright? I liked her all through high school, and I couldn’t get her out of my head for seven years, and now here she is again. I can’t let her slip away. Not again.” His voice was cracking.

“Dude,” Luke said, quieter now. “She does feel the same way. She’s just scared of getting hurt.”

Tony started to say something else but I couldn’t hear it over the sound of stomping coming towards my bunk. Oh god. Who’s pissed at me now?

The curtain ripped open, revealing a hurt-looking Shane, who crawled into my bunk wordlessly and clung to me like a baby.

“He likes you,” he whispered into my chest.

“Yeah, I know, okay? He told me,” I said, rolling my eyes, tired of hearing the same thing over and over again.

“Not Tony,” he argued. “Luke. You can see it. He wants you. He’s jealous of Tony because he knows you want Tony more than you want him.”

My jaw dropped in shock and I shook my head in denial. “He doesn’t like me, Shane. We only kissed because he thought it would make Tony jealous,” I explained guiltily. “Even if he did like me, why are you so offended by it?”

He looked up at me, big hazel eyes glimmering with unshed tears. I could read his face like an open book. I knew that look. That’s the look Tony had when he saw Luke and I kissing. A mix of hurt, love, sadness, and jealousy.

“Oh, honey,” I cooed, wrapping my arms around him. I felt his shoulders shake as he started to cry.

“I’ve liked him for so long and he has no idea,” he whined, jaw trembling. “And he’ll never feel the same way. He’s straight as a board.”

I rubbed his tiny back soothingly. “You don’t know that, sweetie,” I whispered, not knowing what else to say to comfort him.

“He fucks random band sluts all the time,” he protested. “He treats me like I’m his little brother. I could never tell him how I feel, he’d be so creeped out, he’d never talk to me again. If he can’t be my boyfriend, he’ll be my friend. That’s better than nothing.”

“I think he feels the same way about you,” I confessed. “But he doesn’t know it yet. It could be that he has one night stands to try to forget about you. Just give it time.”

Shane pulled back from me and wiped his nose on the sleeve of his hoodie. “Alright,” he whispered, sniffling. Then he smiled. “Thanks, Zoe.”

I nodded at him and rubbed his shoulder. “No problem, hun. I’m always here if you need anything, okay?”

He nodded and climbed off of me, closing the curtain behind him as he left.