The Boyfriend (Experience)

“You’re so annoying!” Monique screams at me. Her hands go up and down with frustration. “Do you know that?”

What’s up with her? Doesn’t she know that I’m bad? Of course like other girls in my town, she wasn’t able to resist my charms and looks. Girls just forget who I am really. They think they will be the ones who can handle me when I show my true colors little by little. But I am never tamed.

“Well,” I finally speak out. “You hear rumors about my bad boy side. You truly thought that I would be tender and mellow in reality?” I snicker.

“Dillon, I know that!” Monique lies furiously. “It’s just that you’re too bad to be one!”

“How so?”

“You’re a psychopath.”

“That’s too harsh."

“Well you have a collection of different kinds of knives! In your living room!”

“So? It can come handy for cutting meat.”

“You don’t even cook!”

“I think my display looks cool.”

“And you have a fondness for slasher flicks. You kept on forcing me to watch the scenes I can’t freaking stand!”

“I’m used to chicks who are crazy about scary films. Like my sister Dallas and Annika.”

“Okay, Dallas is not normal and Annika’s a goth!”

“Is that all you are willing to complain about?”

“Oh right. There was this time, we saw on the new that a thirty-year-old woman has been locked in the basement by her widower father. She only went upstairs to cook and clean the house. Then you said it was a great idea and you should try that. With me!”

“I was joking!” I laugh. “Can’t you take a joke? And even if I had a slave, it wouldn’t be you. You’re too lazy, too dirty and your cooking is so horrible that I prefer eating shit instead.”

“Sorry!” She apologizes half-heartily. “I ‘m sorry that I wasn’t a perfect girlfriend who didn’t meet your standards! Still you have bigger problems than me.”

“Really? Why w-“

“Yeah it’s you,” she interrupts me. “So if you don’t want to be alone for the rest of your life then change yourself!”

She takes out the ring I gifted her and gives me the middle finger.

“ASSHOLE!” She leaves stomping her feet angrily.

She forgot to pay for her drink. Like always!

I get up from my seat. I just came here because Monique wanted to discuss about our relationship. So I have nothing else to do. I head to the cashier when Rebbecca, one of my former girlfriend’s friends, jumps on me.

“BOO!” Rebbecca exclaims. She giggles like an idiot.

I don’t pay attention and I continue with my business. She doesn’t get that I’m not interested in her.

“So, I’m so sorry…”

“Um, why?” I look at her, clueless.

“You broke up with Monique. I saw you guys arguing.”

“You saw that?” I pretend I’m touched. “Mind your own business next time.” Her face drops.

Still she composes it again. “Anyway, if you need someone to talk to, you can join me at Moon Bar at six. It’s happy hour and my friends will be there.”

Oh man why can’t she leave me alone? I decide on the hard way.

“Listen,” her eyes are focused. “I’m completely fine. I don’t need a shoulder to cry on, especially from someone like you.”

Rebbecca smiles as in she understood me and she’s okay. But her eyes somehow indicate that she’s disappointed. It’s not my fault, she’s the one who bugged me and got into this mess. She just stares at me and I later hear the entrance door banging.

“Hey Shell,” I say hello to one of my mates.

“You can call me Shelley or Lee.”Shell mutters.

“Whatever dude.”

“You finally got rid of Monique.”

“Were you eavesdropping from the counter?”

“Couldn’t resist. You were both loud.”

“God, your ears are big!” I lie.

“So are you gonna pay or what?”

“Sure. How much?”

Shell gestures to the green dotted numbers displayed on the cashing machine’s screen.

“You know Shell,” I slouch on the counter. “You are the only girl except Dallas and Annika that I’m very close to. Why aren’t you my girlfriend?”

“Because Dillon,” she replies. “You’re not my type. Besides by the way you act, you’re already considered a prick. Good thing I’m friends with you.”

“Thanks a lot dude.” I go banging the door.

Jesus, why do they say I’m so difficult? I know I am kind of peculiar but as the girls capture my character, they run away. They think I’m pleasing, kind and thoughtful thanks to my good-looking physical appearance. Don’t they remember the old proverb, “never judge a book by its cover”? They’re a bunch of stupid bimbos. Maybe that’s why they are stuck in this island. ‘Cause they have no culture.

I walk not paying attention to nobody. I pass a red-haired girl when she shouts at me.

“Excuse me FELLA!” Did she just call me that!?

I turn backwards. I could walk away but that chick stepped on my nerves.

The so-called red head is what I can say, seriously pissed off. Her face is the same shade as her curly copper red mane. Her blue eyes are like gas cooker flames. Disappointingly, she’s wearing a simple blouse and a blue flower printed skirt. I imagined she would dress up head to toe red or orange due to her angry personality. I look around for what deep trouble I caused her and there it is. A pile of gunk which is supposed to be a cake lies on the street. Wait. It means it fell by me walking past her. I check the sides of my black t-shirt and yellow and pink icings proudly decorate my right side. GREAT!

“Excuse me, you owe me an apology.” The red head reclaims, hands on her hips.

“Look, I need to go. I’m late for a doctor’s appointment.” I forget her and start jogging.

She follows me. Seriously!

“If you were in a hurry, why were you walking slowly like nothing’s disturbing you?” She huffs.

Dammit. She resists me unlike others.

“My appointment popped on my mind, suddenly!”

“After you destroyed my cake?”

“Stop following me! I’m going to see my shrink!”

“I’m not stopping until you have apologized to me!”

“Is there another way?”

“There is but it’s kind of personal!”

“Say it!”

“Are you sure you rather do something which lasts a day than apologizing which takes two seconds?”

I honestly didn’t think the question through.

“Whatever! I don’t care!”

“Fine!” She slows down. “I want you to be my boyfriend for tomorrow.”

“WHAT!?” My sneakers screech on the ground in reaction. “What did you say?”

“I. Want. You. To. Be. My. Boyfriend. For. Tomorrow.”

“Are you freaking mad!?” I breathe in quickly. “We just met!”

“I know but you were the-“

“Hello?” I cut her off. “I’m not going to do that for a destroyed cake! That’s pointless! Are you sure you don’t want money?” I grin charmingly.

“Heck no!” She grimaces. “I spent hours on this masterpiece. There’s no way money can replace it.”

“Alright.” I fake that I take her offer. “It’s a deal.”

She hands out her hand and I shake it.

“See you tomorrow!” She waves at me. “Oh and I forgot.”

“What?”

“What’s your number?”

“It’s 7767081.” Totally wrong.

“Alright, I’ll see you tomorrow morning. I’m Everleigh. You?”

“Ever-WHAT!?”

“It’s Everleigh.” She corrects me, rolling her eyes. “And I asked for your name too.”

“It’s Dillon.”

“Bye Dillon,” She runs off.

What an odd day. A girl I only met in an unfortunate way asks me to be her boyfriend. For a day. Who does that? Anyway she’s not going to show up at my place in the morning. Then she’s a total stalker.

“Whatever Dillon,” I murmur. “Do you really think that you would get a replacement fast?”

I continue my way to the parking spot.