You Are Exactly My Brand of Heroin

My band and I laid sprawled out across four small love seats in Ben Johnson's, our producer, office. Taylor had to discuss something she referred to as utterly important with him.

"When are we fucking leaving?" Logan asked. His hair covered his eyes, so I couldn't truly say that he'd been asleep, but his groggy voice pretty much gave away that insistence.

"I don't know, dick face!" Jordan shouted as he threw a burgundy velor pillow at Logan.

"Asshole," Logan muttered after the pillow hit him in the face.

"Knock it off, you two," I said as I laid my feet in Garrett's lap. I admired Garrett a lot, because he reminded me of someone I once knew, and he shared a relationship with Taylor just like the one that I once shared with my brother. Even though I missed that sort of feeling, I didn't miss the person who created it.

"They only act like that because they're immature freaks!" Brett shouted, directing that comment at Logan and Jordan.

"Shut up, bitch!" Jordan said, throwing two more pillows at Brett. Thus began an enormous pillow fight. I shoved my hand into the back pocket of my jeans, grabbing my BlackBerry. The screen read seven forty-two p.m. We'd been there since five thirty. I sighed and shoved the phone back in my pocket.

"What do you guys say we go get some food? I'm starving," I asked. They all immediately stopped and ran to the door. Garrett laughed and shoved my feet off of his lap so that he could get off the couch, helping me up after he'd stood.

"Do you think we should ask Tay if she wants something to eat?" Garrett asked me as we made our way toward the exit. I shook my head.

"Hell no! She kept us waiting this entire fucking time, so she can get her own damn food!" I declared.

"Whatever you say," he said, holding the door open for me. I smiled and walked ahead of him, but he caught up with me. Garrett was the calm one out of the crew. He always stayed behind with Taylor and I while the others ran ahead. Even so, at times, just the three of us were crazier than the others put together.

Garrett was my closest guy friend. He was always there for me and would do whatever I asked him to, which could be a bit scary at times but it was very generous nonetheless. We were a lot alike, meaning that we fought a lot over senseless things, just like Taylor and I did. He can be an asshole at times, but he can also be the sweetest person in the whole world, not to mention the fact that he's absolutely gorgeous. Although I see him like that, I've never even touched him. I know he's dying to get in my pants, but I refuse to let him. I'm not in love with Garrett, by any means, and I've come this far maintaining my virginity. I'm not about to lose it to someone that I don't feel that I love. Even though that is true, Garrett has gone a bit too far a few times before while he was drunk, but I like to think that it was just the alcohol talking, so I never bring it up because he doesn't seem to remember it. I'm sure that I wouldn't want to.

We walked out into the parking lot and got into my black H2. I always drove everywhere we went, because even though I love my guys, I don't trust them all that much with my vehicles. Garrett got in the passenger seat beside me while Brett and Jordan sat in the seat behind us with Logan in the seat behind them.

"Where to?" I asked as I started the vehicle. They all - except Garrett - decided to speak up at once.

"McDonald's!" Jordan immediately shouted.

"Hell no! KFC all the way, bro!" Logan shouted from where he lay sprawled across the back seat.

"Fuck all of you bitches! White Castle is the shit!" Brett declared.

"What do you say?" I asked Garrett. He smiled at me and glanced back at Brett.

"I couldn't agree more with Brett. What about you?" he asked.

"I've had all I want of Mickey D's and at the moment, KFC is just out of the motherfucking question. I think that pretty much narrows it down," I said. Jordan and Logan groaned. I knew damn well that they would eat at White Castle. They would eat practically anything, and no matter what, Taylor and I usually won all of our arguments with the guys anyway.

We pulled into the White Castle parking lot, which was nearly deserted, and made our way inside the restaurant. After signing a few autographs, we were able to place our order, get our food, and sit somewhere where there were few people gawking at us.

"Abby, is there something bothering you that you haven't told me about?" Garrett suddenly asked me. I wasn't surprised that he'd asked me such a thing, and I wasn't about to give him the answer he was looking for.

I took a bite of a French fry and sighed. "Not likely. I'm fine. I promise. I'm just a little tired from sitting in that god-forsaken office all day," I lied. I could tell by his expression that he wasn't believing a damn word I'd said, but I didn't feel obliged to tell him the truth either. He simply smiled and took a drink of his soda.

"If you say so," he surrendered. He wasn't about to argue with me, because he knew that I would end it just as soon as it started - winning, of course. I hated talking about me, how I feel, and what I think. I guess that's part of my being so selfless or maybe it's insecurity - I'm not sure. I've just always put others before myself.

I had lied to him, though, and I couldn't deny it. I'd felt horrible this entire week. Mainly because I'd been so stressed out about tour starting in three weeks. We were still without a band to tour with, and my stress level had sky rocketed. I was terrified to eat anything for fear that my nerves would get the best of me and make me sick. I acted like a complete bitch at times, and I felt as if I were putting everyone around me through hell, so I would try to do something to make up for it. I was being pulled in all different directions, and I wasn't sure of how much more I could take.

Moments later, my phone began playing HIM's Bleed Well, meaning that I had a new text message. Everyone in the entire restaurant began staring at me, so I snatched my phone off the table and checked to see who the message was from. Everyone in the room but Jordan, Brett, and Logan went back to their normal duties.

"Who is it?" Jordan asked.

"It's Tay. She sent me a message," I replied.

Where the fuck r u guys? I've got good news, so wherever the hell u r, u better get ur ass back here soon!

I sighed and began cleaning up after myself.

"What was it about?" Garrett asked me.

"Your sister has good news," I said, putting air quotes around good and news. We all knew what this could be - I'm sure that I was hoping for it more than anyone else - and we all finished cleaning up and made our way out to the H2. The entire ride back to Ben's office was spent in utter silence.

We arrived at Ben's office to find Taylor anxiously awaiting us in the parking lot. We were all a bit leery of this moment and of what Taylor had to say.

"Hurry up, you guys! You're not going to believe this!" Taylor shouted as she bounced up and down on her heels and clapped her hands together like a little kid in a candy store.

"Listen, Tay. What, exactly, is Ben going to tell us when we get in there?" Brett asked. Taylor couldn't hold it in much longer. She bit her lower lip as she clung to my right arm - Garrett appearing on my left side - trying her best not to reveal it to us.

"Just tell us already!" Jordan shouted at her.

"Alright! Alright already! He's going to tell us who we'll be touring with." The guys sighed in relief. I sighed in relief, too, but also in agony. Yes, I was looking forward to tour and I was relieved that we'd found someone who was willing to tour with us, but I wasn't looking forward to tour preparations. We had so many things to do in such a short amount of time. Obviously, Taylor was going to want to go shopping before we left, and I promised her that we would. Unlike some people I used to know, I don't break the promises that I make. Not to mention the fact that we would have to have a new make-up artist and hair stylist. We'd need a merchandise promoter and roadies! I mean, how much more hectic can that get? Okay, I know it may not sound bad to anyone else, but it sounds like sheer hell to me.

We entered Ben's office to find Reagan, Ben's wife and secretary, sitting at her desk. She smiled at us.

"Hi guys! Welcome back, Tay! Ben's still in his office, so you can go back there now. Good luck!" she said. Reagan was always a very beautiful and lively person no matter what the situation may be, and I'm sure that's why Ben married her. I smiled at her and walked down the hall, partially being dragged by Taylor. Taylor shoved Ben's office door open without even bothering to knock and ushered all of us into chairs.

"I think your sister has gone motherfucking insane," I whispered to Garrett. He chuckled softly.

"Well, she's your best friend," he simply replied. I rolled my eyes and accepted my fate: I would be stuck with Taylor for all of eternity, but at least I would know that the eternity would be entertaining.

"Hey guys. What's up?" Ben greeted us as we sat before him.

"Not much. Now, tell us who the hell we're touring with!" Brett shouted.

"Isn't that what you're here for?" he laughed. "Alright, then. We'll get right into it. As all of you know, Taylor and I have been trying our best to get you guys on tour with another band but have resulted unsuccessful. That is, until now. Today, we received a call from someone instead of making one."

"That's good, so who the hell is it?" Jordan asked.

Ben smiled deviously and said, "Slow your roll there, Jay.You'll find that out on Monday; when you meet them." I sighed in aggravation. I hated surprises, and they all knew that. Even Ben, and yet, he still seemed to push my buttons and try to make me seem like the biggest bitch in the world.

"Is there a purpose for doing this to us?" I asked. Taylor nodded with a small smile. She knew what I was thinking and her mind was set on the whole me hating surprises ordeal, but I could tell that she must have had a legitimate excuse up her sleeve.

"We think that you guys will be overjoyed with the band that we picked - well, that picked you guys - so we thought that it would be even better if we surprised you. I know that it seems like torture, but it wont be once you meet them. I promise," Taylor added. Here we go again, I thought. More with the promises. All I knew was that she better hope that she was right, because in all honesty, I was absolutely not in the mood for any of this shit.

"Whatever you say. By the way, what about a make-up artist, a hair stylist, merchandise promoters, and roadies. Did you think about that?" I asked. I was sure they hadn't thought of everything. I mean, we hadn't even had anyone to tour with at the time. They couldn't have possibly gotten us other assistants too.

"For now, you'll be using the other bands roadies. It's your first tour, and since this is all being planned on such short notice, we don't have time to recruit a crowd of people. You'll also use their merch people for the very same reason that you'll be using their roadies. As far as a make-up artist and hair stylist go, Taylor interviewed a few people for the jobs a couple of weeks ago, and she found two that were perfect. Taylor has it arranged as to when you'll be meeting them, so if you want to know anything about that, she's the person you need to talk to. Anything else?" Ben asked.

"Uh... Yeah," Jordan spoke up. "How much alcohol can we drink? Is there, like, a limit or somethin'?" Everyone burst out laughing. We needed something to lighten up the mood, and no matter what, you could always rely on Jordan to be the one to do it.

"I don't think it really matters as long as you have enough sober time to please your fans," Ben said, laughing along with us.

"Fair enough," Jordan replied.

"Aside from all of that and Jordan's amazing question, does anyone else have anything more to ask Taylor or I?" No one said anything. "Good.You're all dismissed," Ben said.

"God, B. Take it easy. We're not in fucking high school anymore," Logan stated.

"True, but sometimes, you guys need high school discipline."

"More importantly, though, thanks a lot for getting us someone to tour with, Ben. We appreciate it more than you know," I said as I stood up and headed for the door.

"Don't thank me. Thank her," he said as he pointed to Taylor. She smiled when I looked at her.

"Thanks so much, Tay. I mean it. We really do appreciate you going through all this trouble these past two years, and just for putting up with our shit, I'll take all of us out tomorrow night. Sound good?" I said. I would've much rather have gotten drunk then went shopping, even though I knew that I couldn't avoid it.

"It sounds absolutely wonderful, but I put up with you guys only because I love you guys. Not for the money or anything like that. You're all the most important people in my life, and I wouldn't change that for the world". At that moment, we all couldn't help but call a group hug. We all closed in on Taylor and hugged her for a brief moment as she giggled the entire time.

"AW!!! WE LOVE YOU TAYLOR!!!" Brett shouted.

"I love you guys, too, but would you mind getting off of me? I kinda can't breathe..." she said as she chuckled a bit. We all let go of her at the simultaneously. Logan, Brett, and Jordan said goodbye to Ben once more and ran out of the office.

"They're crazy," Taylor said as she watched after them.

"That may be true, but they're our boys. Even this one," I said as I ruffled Garrett's hair. He smiled at me and attempted to fix his hair.

"Easy on the hair, chick," he said. I rolled my eyes and went on. I knew he would say something like that.

"That's the least you could say! You're lucky you're not related to him," Taylor said, pretending to be absolutely disgusted with him.

"Kiss my ass, bitch," Garrett said to his sister.

"I'll pass. It's probably not clean," she said. Ben and I laughed.

"You two never stop fighting with each other, do you?" Ben asked. He laughed to himself. "Anyway, I'll see you guys in a few days. Until then, enjoy yourselves."

"We will. Well be seeing you, too, Ben," I said as Taylor, Garrett, and I left his office. Reagan sat at her desk, just as she had been when we'd entered the office nearly twenty minutes ago.

"Bye, you guys. I'll see you on Monday!" she said as we shoved the glass double doors open.

"Later, Ray," Garrett answered for us.

"So Tay," I said as I shoved my hands into the back pockets of my jeans, glancing at Garrett so that he would know what I was about to say. We kept a steady pace all the way to the end of the sidewalk, where I had parked just so we could talk. "What about our make-up artist and hair stylist? When do we meet them? Why did you interview them without telling us?"

"Slow down there, hun. I can only answer one question at a time, so to start off, your make-up artist's name is Natalie Sullivan. I've known her since elementary school, so we're pretty close. Your hair stylist's name is Ciara Morris. I also knew her in elementary school. She's Natalie's best friend, too. Trust me. You'll like these girls. They're one of a kind. If I didn't trust them, I wouldn't let them in on such an important part of all of our lives. Plus, they heard the band, and they couldn't be more excited to tour with us. We meet them on Sunday for lunch. Now, you want to know why I hid it from you that I interviewed them, right?" Garrett and I nodded. She really did have all of this planned out. "For the same reason that you won't find out who we're touring with until you meet them. It's a surprise, and I knew that you would like them, so why not wait and introduce them to you when we found a band to tour with?" I sighed. So much stress had just been lifted off of my shoulders, and yet, so much has been put on them at the same time. I mean, Taylor has taken care of most of our preparations, so there's really no need to worry about them anymore, but at the same time, she's bringing more things into my life for me to worry about. Not to mention the fact that we don't know who were touring with yet. That's going to bother the hell out of me. "That still doesn't mean that I'm going to tell you anything about who we're touring with, though." I knew she'd add that in just for the sake of Garrett being there and how much of a smart ass he can be.

"I don't know what to say. You've done so many things in such a short amount of time Taylor, you're amazing!" I said as I threw my arms around her.

"Thanks, Abbs, but I'm not any better than the rest of you guys."

"That's so not true! You're amazing, and you know that!" I said as I released her at the very moment that we arrived at the Hummer. I threw the keys to Taylor who had already instinctively walked over to the driver's side of the car. Garrett climbed into the backseat with the rest of the guys without saying anything. Taylor twirled the keys in her hands for a moment, staring at them as if they were rare. I could tell that she truly felt like she'd accomplished her life-long dream, and that she had. She'd made many people very, very happy, and that's something that a lot of people don't have the willpower to do. "You can drive, Tay." She looked up at me, then and smiled.

"Thanks, Abbs." I returned the favor as the both of us climbed into the vehicle.