The Hummingbird's Heart

“Why the hell are you trying to cover your chest? There's nothing in there!”

“Excuse me, I'm just being a lady in here.”

“You're in my body, God-damn-it! You. Do. Not. Have. Boobs!”

When Audrey Jones in Gustav Wood's body looked like she was about to cry again, Gustav groaned in disgust. They were standing in his bathroom and she already took off the shirt. “Please don't make that face with my face,” he commanded. Audrey-in-Gustav didn't look very pleasant with that command.

“Do you know how humiliating it is to be with a stranger without any shirt on?”

“I'm in your body, Audrey Jones, you shouldn't be ashamed to be naked in front of yourself.”

“Well I know that you're a Gustav Wood, whoever Gustav Wood is, inside my body!”

Gustav sighed, “Do you want to take a bath or not?”

Audrey winced and nodded.

“Can I cry just... like... one time?”

“No.”

“You are one mean man, Gustav Tomas Skjerdal Wood.”

“Wait. Where'd you know my full name?”

“I can read. Your MacBook was open with your Tumblr dashboard in there. You really should consider putting password on your MacBook.”

“I usually do, I just don't do it when I don't take my MacBook anywhere. Now take off your pants—my pants.”

“No!”

“Look, if you really want to take a bath, just endure it, okay?”

Audrey nodded. Gustav chuckled, because it was actually hilarious to see himself want to cry—cry like a girl, because there was indeed a girl inside his body now.

“Okay, so just...” he knelt with her tiny body and pull down his black jeans.

She cried, loud, and exactly like a girl.

“Nooooooooo! Don't just do it like that!”

“It's my fucking body! Don't cry! Oh... God... seriously... don't fucking cry! God... that's just gross... why are you crying like a little girl... please don't make that face with my face. I'm a 28 years old man, for fuck's sake!”

“I'm so embarrassed!” she cried before she pressed her palms—his palms actually—into her face in embarrassment. It was so weird.

“Look. It's alright now. Just step out from that jeans—and socks—and take a bath. It will be just fine.”

He watched himself sat on the edge of bath tub, kicking the jeans out of his feet while crying. Not crying hysterically, but it was still pretty disturbing. In the middle of her cry, she managed to say, “I like your socks.”

Gustav laughed. It was weird to think that he liked her laugh—he liked how her laugh sounded. It was high-pitched ringing laugh.

“Pizza socks. Fraser gave it to me,” he explained.

Audrey was distracted from her cry, “Who's Fraser? Your Young Guns mate?”

“Yeah.”

Audrey looked down and groaned.

“Oh! Crap! I just looked at you in front of you! I mean, I looked at it before when I took a piss, but still...”

Now Gustav was the one who feel embarrassed.

“Okay, just... just don't stare at it,” he mumbled.

Audrey nodded and she stood up to take the shower. She looked pretty happy when she took the shower. “You know what, the best medicine in the world is a warm shower,” she said happily before she sings, “I set fiiire—to the shooower! I'm so tall and I'm not Audreeey! Oh, I just like your voice. Maybe I'll give your band a try later.”

Gustav stared at her—his body.

“You get sad and happy pretty easy, aren't you?”

Audrey nodded. Her face was framed with his wet hair and she mumbled, “I don't get out a lot. So...”

“What are you doing? For living?” asked Gustav.

“I'm currently about to doing my post-doc on Manchester University now.”

“Post-doc? Like in after PhD?”

“Yes.”

“How old are you?”

“Twenty two.”

“No wonder you don't get out a lot.”

“Don't get it wrong, I'm happy with my life, but this is my first proper holiday since I finished my PhD in two years, so...”

Gustav smiled in apology, “I'm sorry I kind of ruined your first proper holiday.”

“Don't say that. I mean, it's not your fault we somehow exchange soul or something. … ahhh, okay. I'm done now. It's hard because your body is obviously larger than mine, but your hands are also larger, so it's all good.”

Gustav handed her the towel and Audrey smiled.

“Thanks.”

It was so weird to see himself grinning in front of him.

There was less fuss when Audrey tried to bathe her own body. In the beginning, she did another no-I'm-going-to-cry-if-you-do-it-to-my-body before somehow Gustav asked her whether this was her first time being naked in front of a man and she shook her head.

“So... don't look at it too much, okay?”

Gustav nodded. He was really really embarrassed, somehow, when he saw himself stripping the clothes that he wear in Audrey's body. Audrey chuckled somehow. “Oh... Man, you should see my face when I'm embarrassed. I look like thirteen years old girl—it's kind of hilarious.”

Audrey was pretty happy after Gustav accepted her offer to wash her own body, who was currently occupied by Gustav. Audrey was singing in his voice as she rub his back. She was singing Seal's song titled “Kiss from a Rose” happily when Gustav mumbled.

“You really just know old songs, don't you? What's the last song you've heard?”

“Between Vivaldi's 'Four Seasons' and Cecilia Bartoli's 'Agitata da due venti Vivaldi'... or was it Puccini's 'O Mio Babbino Caro'? I can't recall.”

“You like Vivaldi, huh?”

“Mm hm.”

“What's the song you sing back there? In the living room?”

“Oh, it's Pearl Jam's 'Jeremy'. I think it was released on 1992.”

“And Seal's 'Kiss from a Rose' was released around 1997, unless I'm mistaken. It's like you're coming from a past or something.”

“Maybe I should listen to more mainstream music so I can talk about it to people my age... but then again, I don't meet a lot of them. Alright, you're okay to go now.”

Audrey can pull in Gustav's clothes without any difficulty, but Gustav sure felt weird when Audrey dressed him in her clothes. Even though, he felt really weird in comfortable way when he stared at his reflection on the mirror.

Tiny shoulders, small arms, and long hair. “I feel pretty,” he mumbled with her voice. Usually, it would be weird to say something like that, but when Gustav thought about it, he just saw her naked and she just saw him naked—technically, it's their own bodies, but still—so there's really nothing much left to be embarrassed about.

“Well, you're in my body, which is not exactly the prettiest body ever or whatever... I don't exercise a lot and that explains the, uh, chubby stomach... and my favourite food is instant ramen. I ate it all the time between my research break, even though I usually forget to eat regularly three times a day when I'm concentrating. You, on the other hand, are going to gym, right? That explains the arm.”

Gustav nodded, “It's fun to do it once in while with the guys, so... will someone looking for you? I mean, I told you that all I need to do now is write songs...”

“People looking for me? No, I told them I'm going for one month holiday.”

“No one is going to contact you, then? Your family? Your friends? Your boyfriend?”

Audrey start to comb her hair—his dark brown hair, to be exact, “How do you usually comb your hair? Nah, my parents are dead. My Dad passed away four years ago. My Mum didn't really want to live after that, I guess. She passed away three years ago. I was sad, but my honours was really great. I don't have siblings and the majority of my friend is probably in the middle of their research and they won't waste their time to try to contact me while they know that I'm in the middle of my holiday. If they're not doing their research, they must be in an international conference somewhere. I broke up with my last boyfriend Matt four months ago after he met this divorced lady from Harvard in an conference in Geneva. She's a real beauty and a brain, by the way, I like her as well, her research about the growth of art in Southern Asia is really fascinating and she has the coolest hair ever, so I'm happy for both of them.”

“Just... let me do the hair combing for you,” Gustav took the comb and mumbled, “You're a very open person, do you know that?”

“Oh, I'm just... I think I'm basically talk too much. I don't usually talk this much. I usually write this much.”

“Don't worry about that. It's fascinating to see myself talking about 'my ex-boyfriend and his new Harvard girlfriend'.”

Audrey grinned with his lips, “Coolbeans. Right, we're done now. We took shower, we combed each other's hair, and we're ready to go. Where do you usually have your breakfast, Gus? I'm starving. How many plates do you usually eat for breakfast?”

Gustav stepped into Audrey's sneakers and thank to God silently that she didn't use high heels or some kind of girl's complicated shoes and jerked his head toward another street.

“I know place who sells the best bacon and egg around here—and I think I eat like a normal human.”

“Oh. Okay. I mean, your body is bigger than me, so maybe you need more food or something. I don't want to be hungry in this... body. By the way, let's try to act more like... more like our body when we go out.”

“That might be hard.”

“I know. Just be polite in my body.”

“And you, Audrey, be manly.”

“After we meet your friend, I think I'd like you to teach me how to do things manly—like how to walk like a man.”

Gustav snorted, “I can't believe this is happening.”

Audrey laughed, “I can't believe it either. Just hang on until we figure out how to fix us.”