Nothing Else Matters

As I made my way back to Veronica’s little corner, I felt like a giant weight had been lifted off of my chest, as if I could breathe easier, as if my mind were clearer.

She was still lounging on the bed, lying on her stomach, ankles crossed, earphones in, and eyes closed, hands tapping absently at the mattress. I sat down, bouncing up and down to get her attention. She opened her eyes lazily, and then yanked off the earphones.

I could hear the faint strains of the song she’d been listening to, but couldn’t place my finger on who or what it was.

“so?” she asked and I smiled.

“I think everything’s going to be fine.”

She tumbled over and kicked her legs up, letting out an uncharacteristically girly squeal.

“Yeeeee!!!! Thank God!”

I tossed a pillow at her. “Oh whatever. So, now what?”

she lifted herself up off the bed and sauntered over to the window, peeking out. “Well, we’re still somewhere in the middle of this damn desert so….I don’t know. There isn’t much to do.”

I sighed. Since we had just made a stop, we probably would be on the road for a couple of more hours. A buzzing noise filled the room and Veronica dove for the bed, snatching up her phone. After a second, she tossed it back onto the bed and bit her lip. Her eyes closed and she seemed to be trying to compose herself.

I wasn’t sure if I should look somewhere else or not, but just as quickly, she opened up her eyes and smiled brightly.

“Well, let’s go find something to do” she said.

The smile didn’t quite reach her eyes and her voice was just a tad bit high-pitched, enough that I could sense the forced emotion behind it. I contemplated pressing her for information, but the look that flashed across her eyes told me not to, as if she sensed my curiosity and was warning me against it.

“Sure” I said.

We headed out, to where the guys, James as well, were still grouped up at the front of the bus.

“Truth or Dare?’ Veronica announced and I did a doubletake.

Before waiting for anyone to answer she produced a bottle of vodka.

“Yea!” Kirk whooped, pushing some cushions aside. Veronica squeezed in and patted the space next to her, motioning for me to join her. I hesitated and then went ahead.

“I’m not drinking” I warned her.

She laughed and nodded. I couldn’t help but wonder what had brought this sudden change on, but didn’t ponder on it long. Veronica took a swig, shut her eyes against the burn I knew she was feeling, and then pointed at Kirk.

"Truth or Dare?” she asked.

He smirked, and responded quickly.

“Dare.”

Everyone whooped and hollered.

“Dare you to stick your ass out the window” Robert called out.

Kirk got up, and headed to the side window. I averted my eyes but when I heard the sound of a belt buckle and then fabric hitting the floor, followed by whistles and laughter, I couldn’t help but laugh along as well.

As soon as he was back, he snatched the bottle from Vero, contemplating it before taking a deep swallow, then another, then one more.

“Truth or Dare” he asked her.

She bit her lip coyly, leaning back with a sigh that was heavy with suspense.

“Dare” she finally said.

His eyes gleamed wicked and the smirk he flashed her had me wondering what exactly what it was he was planning. She must have sensed it to, because she shook her head.

“I didn’t give you your dare, so you don’t get to give me mine.”

His expression fell and he pouted, but she shot him a dead-serious warning type look. It seemed there was more to it, but I had no idea what was going on. My eyes landed on Lars, who had his hand on her thigh.

It wasn’t a sexual gesture; it seemed to be more of a comfort type thing. A disoriented sensation washed over me; I felt lost.

James opened his mouth to speak, presumably to call out a dare, but before he could, Vero’s phone buzzed. My forehead wrinkled; I thought she had left it on the bed. She snatched it up and glanced at the screen before shoving it angrily into her pocket again.

“Give me my dare” she said roughly.

The mood in the room had changed, it suddenly seemed filled with too much tension.

“dare you to give me your phone” Lars said.

Veronica’s mouth set in a hard line and she eyed him coldly. He returned it, and it seemed they were having a silent conversation with their eyes. Finally, she handed over her phone and slumped backwards, slouching against the cushions.

“Someone, go” she said.

I turned to James, eyebrow raised. “Do you know what’s going on?” I hissed.

He shrugged. “Not really. Lars mentioned her having…relationship problems? He’s trying to talk her outta being with the bastard.”

I felt a knot twist in my stomach and I looked up to see Veronica watching me. The look in her eyes spoke a thousand words and suddenly it all made sense. I couldn’t help but feel a bit awkward, that I hadn’t picked up on it earlier.

Things had been crazy though, and Veronica wasn’t one to outwardly admit her problems though, so how was I to know?

I did know though, that her relationship wasn't working out, hadn't been for awhile, and it was draining her. I excused myself, knowing I would hear footsteps following me. Sure enough, I heard the tap-tap of her boots.

“We broke up and the fucker won’t let go” she said.

I blinked twice. ‘Wait…what?”

She nodded. “I broke up with him, the second night of this tour. But he keeps texting me, calling me.”

I nodded. “Ok…and Lars? What’s his role in all of this?”

She sighed. “He told me he has a thing for me. But he doesn’t know that we’re not together anymore. He told me the second it was over, he’d find a way to…hurt him.”

I raised an eyebrow. Veronica’s ex-boyfriend wasn’t a violent guy, why would Lars need to hurt him? As if she knew what I was thinking she sat down. I braced myself for a long explanation. She ran a hand through her hair and rubbed her temples, and I could practically see the words turning in her mind.

“He didn’t want me to come on this tour, told me I was chasing some hopeless dream of being a female drummer. He started telling me I was just going to waste my time, told me I wasn’t ready to go out and explore the world, a bunch of bullshit. He was just too…suffocating. Too damn clingy and I couldn’t take it. So I ended it. It wasn’t easy though, cause I think he must have sensed it. I’d cry at night, stressed out and Lars was there telling me to do what I knew was right for me, what was best. That night you got drunk, we were in our room at the hotel. He had come over to make sure I was okay and he ended up staying all night, just talking. I mean, that’s all we really so is talk, but then he started to lean in, and I backed away. I guess I panicked? But he said it was fine, he respected that I made myself clear. I know he still feels something though. And maybe I might, but I can’t, I won’t go there. I just want to be rid of whats-his-name, and not have to worry about guys for a while. I can’t deal with what comes with it and deal with everything else. I just want to get my shit done, keep a focus on that, before bringing in another person to share my life with.”

I nodded, understanding what she was saying. I hadn’t realized all of this was going on and damn, it was a lot.

“Don’t tell him though? Lars, I mean? I don’t want anyone to get physically hurt.” she added in.

I hesitated. ‘What if it doesn’t stop though?” I wondered aloud. “You know, if his stalking gets….too intense?”

She sniffled a laugh, and I saw her eyes were glazed over as if she had been trying not to cry. “It won’t. It would have happened by now. But if anything I’ll get a restraining order against him or something. Besides, he’s in LA. It’s harmless.”

I couldn't argue with that, her ex wasn't exactly Mr. Macho. A quick thought flashed across my mind, one I had to know the truth behind. 'So that whole thing with Kirk?"

She rolled her eyes. 'That's just him being stupid. I've gotten so comfortable with them all, but with him, it's like....I don't know. He's just bent on being a horny prick. I knew his dare was going to be something like having me flash my tits or something. I'm not that crazy to do it on a bus full of guys we'll be stuck with for a couple more hours. 'specially with that vodka going around. I mean, fuck! I had brought it so I could forget, not so that they could take it away."

I couldn't help but laugh at the way she spoke; for some reason it was just funny.

She stood up to the mirror, swiping away the makeup that had smudged underneath her eyes. “Let’s get back to the game?”

I nodded. "Sure. Yea…yea, let’s go.”