A World of Fragile Things

Neva awoke just as the sun was setting beneath the trees. No. she thought, vaulting to her feet. She was still completely nude, and the darkening sky was bringing about a pretty rough chill. A brisk wind was beginning to blow, setting her skin alight with gooseflesh. At least she could still remember her name. Where did she leave her clothes? She rubbed her arms, trying to dispel the cold. She bent down to retrieve the knife and tied it behind her neck as she had before. Neva traveled back to the river and pulled the bloody gown out of the tree. The thin piece of fabric did nothing to shield her from the wind. She jabbed her feet into the worn slippers. The wind was whipping the trees back and forth and storm clouds pushed the blue out of the sky. Neva stumbled back into the clearing, almost falling multiple times. Where was the path that she had seen earlier? She had to circle twice before actually finding the path. Which way do I go? Neva brought her hand to her mouth and chewed on her nails anxiously. The knife jumped against her back as she bounced on the balls of her feet. They both have to lead to somewhere, right? She wouldn’t get anywhere by just standing around. “Left it is.” She muttered, hooking a left and started down the path. It had to lead somewhere eventually. Lightening flashed in the sky, eventually followed by a crack of thunder. Damn. Just her luck. Neva hugged herself, looking worryingly toward the sky. Just as she did so, a fat drop of rain dropped into her eye. “Lords, are you kidding me?” The rain fell slowly, but hard enough to soak Neva through. She started jogging down the path. If dark fell before she came to a town, she would most likely freeze to death.

There was a sudden thudding coming from behind her. Neva whirled around to see a horse drawn wagon coming down the path. “Are you okay?” A girl in a red in jacket called her seat. There was an awning stretched over where she was sitting, keeping her dry.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” Neva replied. “Just trying to get to town.” At least I’m going the right way.

“I can give you a lift!” The girl smiled at her. When Neva hesitated, the girl spoke again. “Please, you look freezing cold.”

It’d be stupid to disagree. She'd die otherwise. And if this girl was going to kill her... well, hopefully it would be quicker. “Yeah, that would be great.” Neva made her way to the wagon. The girl scooted over to make way for her. Neva hopped onto the seat. The relief was immediate. While Neva didn’t feel any stinging from the rain, her body began to shake uncontrollably.

“My name is Alana.” The girl said, smiling. Her amber gaze was full of kindness. With one hand, raked her auburn hair out of her face. She flicked the reins and the horse began to move again.

“I’m Neva.” Neva replied slowly. It felt strange to speak her name aloud.

“Where are you from, Neva?” Alana smiled at Neva kindly.

Neva took a deep breath. She would have to be honest with someone immediately, right? “Well, to be honest, I have no idea. I just woke up in the middle of a clearing back there wearing this bloodstained gown and slippers. I don’t have any personal memories, and I really don’t know where I’m from.” Neva omitted the part about finding the knife.

Alana was silent for a moment. “Well, that’s unfortunate, and I’m sorry. Would you like my jacket?”

Neva was taken aback. “N-no! I couldn’t! You need it!”

“I’ve got more, and that hospital gown can’t be keeping you warm.” Alana laughed. “Please, I insist. I have plenty of jackets, and you definitely need it more than I do.”

“I-if you insist…”

“Please take these for a moment.” Alana thrust the reins into Neva’s hands. She held them awkwardly, not quite sure what to do with them. Alana was having issues in prying the jacket off. At one point, she swatted Neva in the face with her hand. “I’m so sorry, are you okay?” Alana had worry plastered all over her face and had one of her hands pressed to her mouth.

“Yes, I’m okay.” Neva chucked as she passed back the reins. Her damp skin resisted the cloth at first but once she was swathed in the jacket, she nearly cried from the relief she felt. “Thank you so much. I greatly appreciate it.”

“Of course.” Alana said sweetly.

They rode a few minutes in silent, listening to the thud of horse hooves in the mud and the spatter of rain as it pelted the awning.

“So where are we?” Neva asked, peering around.

“Well, if I’m going to be broad, we’re in the region of Harvest. But we’re headed to the town of Leigh.”

Harvest… Leigh… Neva made sure to keep these words straight in her mind. They would be helpful to her later on. “Is Leigh a nice town?”

“Oh, yes. Very beautiful.” Alana grinned. “We’ll stop right outside of town and I’ll give you some suitable clothes to wear.”

“You don’t have to do that!” Neva insisted. “Please, I’ve known you for less than five minutes and you’re already overwhelming me with kindness.”

“No, it’s my pleasure!” It seemed as if Alana had a perpetually genuine grin on her face. It twisted Neva’s heart to know that there was a person whose kindness was sincere. Or at least she hoped it was. “I also would love if you stayed at my home until you regained your memories.”

“No! I can’t take advantage of your kindness like that, that’s unfair!” How could a stranger be so kind to her? She had a knife, she could kill her at any time. Neva couldn’t intrude in her life. Not when she was so lost in her own.

“Please. I insist. I have a spare room. It’ll be danger wandering around, not knowing what you’re doing. I would feel much more at ease if you had a place to stay consistently.”

“Why would you open your home to a complete stranger?” Neva asked warily. A headache was beginning to split into Neva’s head, stemming from the frigidness of her hair. She rubbed her temples, trying to comprehend why someone she didn’t know would offer her such niceties.

“I don’t know.” Alana admitted. “You’re honest. And you seem kind, and lost. I would just feel so horribly guilty if I could do something to help you out and just didn’t.”

“I could be dangerous, though.” Neva insisted.

“Someone who was actually dangerous would never say something like that.” Alana laughed. It was a lighthearted laugh, one that could warm the most frozen heart.

Neva remained quiet for a moment. “I just want you to be sure of the decision you’re making.” She said quietly.

“I’m sure. Kindness is abundant in Harvest. I’m just showing you the same sort of kindness that I would want someone to show me.” Her voice was gentle. It had the soothing tone of a mother comforting her child after they had suffered an injury. Neva was dumbstruck. She stared at Alana uncomprehendingly. Her vision became blurry, and before she knew what was happening, the tears were rolling down her face. Neva’s chest began to heave with sobs. She dropped her face into her hands to conceal the tears.

The cart stopped moving. As Neva drew her head out of her hands she felt Alana’s arms lace around her shoulders. Neva was pulled tight against Alana’s arms. Hold it together. Neva commanded herself. You’re strong. You will not cry on this stranger’s shoulder because she’s being nice to you. What in the Gods’ names kind of person are you? And yet the tears fell, soaking into Alana’s shirt. Neva sobbed heavily, an act her body had been begging for since she woke up in the clearing with no memory of what kind of person she was. Oh Gods, I’m a wreck. You need to pull yourself together. Neva began to draw deep breaths. Breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out. When Neva pulled away from Alana, her frigid fingers came to her face to wipe away her tears. “Sorry, I’m just in awe about how someone could offer such genuine acts of kindness to someone else, especially when they know nothing about that person. I’m not sure anybody has ever been that kind to me.”
Alana frowned, her eyebrows furrowing ever so slightly. “I know this must be weird, especially because you don’t have any memories to go off of. I have always strived to be kind to those around me. Ever since I was young. It was what my parents taught me.” At the mention of her parents, Alana bit down on her lip.

Dead parents then. Neva pursed her lips before busting into a false grin. “That’s great philosophy. It’s great that there are people like you in the world.”

This brought the smile back to Alana’s face. “While I don’t think you’re a criminal, I would feel a lot more comfortable if I had a friend stay with us as well.”

Neva was taken aback. It’s okay. You should have known she wouldn’t feel safe with you completely by herself. “Yeah, whatever you need to do.”

“I’d put you in the inn where he could keep an eye on you, but I’m afraid I don’t have the money for that.” Alana shook her head softly.

“He? Who is he?”

“His name is Caldwell. Don’t worry; I’ve known him since I was a kid. There isn’t a bad bone in his body.” The sincerity in her voice was too hard to resist and Neva found herself nodding enthusiastically.

“He sounds fantastic.” Neva said. She hoped Alana wasn’t jaded by the fact that she was in love with Caldwell. Neva thought that Alana’s judgment was keen though.

Hopefully.

The cart jolted suddenly as it pulled onto a bridge, causing Neva fell back against the seat. The knife pressed into her skin, not hard enough to cut, but hard enough to remind Neva that it was there in the first place. “I found a knife beside me when I woke up in the clearing.” Neva said vaguely, twisting her arm behind her back to finger the knife through her gown. “It’s flat all the way through the handle, not big at all. I don’t know where it came from, but there’s blood stained into the leather on the handle. I cut off a piece of my gown and used it to tie the knife up against my back. I kept it because I was worried I would run into something that was out to do me harm.”

“I’m glad you were honest with me about that.” Alana said after a moment of silence. “I understand. If I was in your situation, I would do the exact same thing.”

“I’m really glad you don’t find that threatening.” Neva barked out a laugh.

“Of course. I am just going to ask you to leave it outside my home.”

“Right. Okay.” A fear of being separated from the only thing she could use to protect herself. What if someone broke in? How would Neva protect herself then? What if Alana wasn’t the kindhearted person Neva thought she was? What if she was really insane and she was bringing her friend over to do terrible things to her? Nobody would remember Neva, she would be the perfect victim. What is wrong with you? She asked herself incredulously. You really think that this girl wants to kill you? If she wanted to kill you, she could have done it ages ago. “So, where did you travel to that required this big wagon and all this stuff?” Neva didn’t particularly care, but she figured it would be best to change the subject of the conversation from her to Alana. People liked to talk about themselves, right? Neva might even be able to learn a bit more about the landscape of the land.

“Well, I’m a traveling merchant. I go mostly between Harvest, Equinox, and Solstice, selling goods such as fruits, jewelry, pottery, and stuff like that that can’t be found in the other regions. It takes close to three months to make my full circuit, and I’m on the road all the time. When I run out of product and weighed down with money, I buy product from the other regions and bring it back to sell in the market in Leigh. I make decent wages.” Alana smiled. “But I love the sights the most. Equinox has these beautiful leaves that are perpetually shades of orange, red, yellow, and green. Solstice has sunny weather all the time and beaches you could sleep on for hours! Sometimes, if I’m lucky and the weather is warm, I can even travel to Immure.”

Neva looked sharply at Alana, “Immure? What is that?”

“It’s the region of snow. Usually I can’t even get there because my wheels get stuck and I have to turn back. I always try, but I can only go once every two years. But you should see the fresh fallen snow. It’s so beautiful. And the way it coats the trees: Fantastic! I can get a lot of cool do-dads there, and they’re always ready to buy fresh produce and meat.” Alana’s smile faltered a bit.

Snow… Neva shut her eyes and tried to imagine it. Snow snow snow. And for a moment, she could see it. She could see the flurries spinning in the air. She could taste the flakes melting on her tongue. Tears stung her eyes behind the lids. Oh thank the Gods. Her mind murmured. Thank the Gods for this one thing. For this one memory. Neva considered telling Alana, but then thought better of it. She would hold the thought of snow to her heart and for now, just for now, she would keep it a secret. Neva needed at least one secret to keep. She kept her eyes closed, a smile playing on her lips as she played the image of snow flurries whirling through her mind. The wagon came to a sudden stop. Neva lurched forward, her eyes snapping open. The image of snow evaporated from her mind. “Why are we stopping?” She asked warily. As far as Neva could tell, they weren’t close to a town.

“We’re about ten minutes out from Leigh. I figure I should get you dressed now before we get closer. I don’t want anyone watching you change. Looks like the rain stopped. That’s good. Wouldn’t want you freezing.” Alana hoisted herself out of the cab. “Come on; let’s get you some decent clothes.”
Neva followed in silence. Awkwardly she climbed out of the wagon, refusing help from Alana. She didn’t want this girl to help her with every little thing. It was enough she was lending Neva clothes and giving her a place to stay, she didn’t need her to help her with mundane physical activities. Feeling helpless? Her mind snickered at her. Neva shook the thought away. She wasn’t helpless. Neva gazed up at the sky, gauging for the position of the sun. It was impossible to pinpoint with her vision clouded by trees and, well, clouds.

Neva walked around to the side of the wagon. Alana was stripping the wagon of a blue tarp. “So the rain doesn’t get in.” She huffed. Alana attempted to fold the large tarp, but eventually she got frustrated and just stuffed it into tiny crevice of space in the wagon. “I’ll just take care of that later.” Alana laughed. She climbed into the back of the wagon, inspecting all of the trunks. “This one should be it!” Alana popped open the lid. Her face took on a disgruntled expression. Neva could tell that it wasn’t the right case just by the look on her face. The next two weren’t the right trunks either. “Finally!” Alana exclaimed as she opened the third case. She rifled through the clearly unfolded clothes. “I just got all of these cleaned last night so I didn’t have to do it when I got home.” Neva only nodded along to her words. “First comes undergarments. Here’s a pair of underwear.” Alana tossed the article of clothing to Neva without bothering to look up from the trunk.

Neva was about to tell Alana that she already had a pair of underwear, but stopped when she realized she left hers by the river in her haste. Begrudgingly, she slipped stepped into the white underwear and pulled them up her legs until they rested snugly against her hips. “Bra!” Alana shouted. Neva looked up only to be smacked in the face by a flying piece of blue fabric. “Oops.” She chuckled as Neva gave her a peeved look. “Sorry. I think I’m a little bigger than you, both around the chest and in height, so let me know if that needs to be adjusted.”

“Alright.” Neva said. She pulled her arms out of the jacket sleeve and laid it gently on the grass. She then leaned down to grasp the bottom of the hospital gown. She struggled to pull the gown over her head, as it caught both the knife and her hair. Neva reached back in an attempt to dislodge the knife from the fabric. She drew her fingertip along the length of the blade, trying to find the snag. She hiked her gown up a bit more to try to dislodge it. She succeeded, both in dislodging the blade and cutting a nice bit into her finger, as the weight had been relinquished and pressed further into her finger. The flash of pain sent a wave of anger rolling through her body. Neva pinched the blade between her thumb and middle finger so she could lay it flat against her back and not have it cut her. She finished in getting the gown over her head before unknotting the strip that held the knife to her back. Neva dropped the knife on the ground and put her finger in her mouth, sucking on it hard for a minute.

“You okay?” Alana asked, glancing at Neva before averting her gaze.

“Yeah. You can look. We’ve both got the same parts anyways.” Neva grumbled, irritated at her injury. She snagged the navy bra from its place in the dirt. Neva pulled the hooked straps around her torso and fastened them behind her back. As she hiked the straps over her shoulders, she had to smile. Her brain might have sputtered out when it came to memories, but her muscles were carrying on as if nothing was different in her life.

“Alright.” Alana dropped some clothes in front of Neva. “Looks like I was right about the size difference.” She went around behind Neva. “After adjusting the straps it might feel a bit more comfortable.” Neva gathered her charcoal locks in her hands and pulled it over her shoulder. Alana slipped a finger between the strap and Neva’s skin. “Wow.” Alana said, sounding shocked.

“Everything okay back there?” She tried to put a teasing tone to her voice, but she couldn’t help the zap of fear that hit her.

“Yeah. Well, two things. One- your skin is really warm. Like, really warm. And two, there’s like… a bunch needle marks and bruises on the back of your neck. And one on the side.” Alana pressed softly against Neva’s neck. A dull pain throbbed where Alana’s finger lay.

“That’s odd.” Neva mumbled. “Wonder what that could be from.”

Alana didn’t say a word. She adjusted the straps on the bra so they sat snug on Neva’s shoulders. “There. That’s much better, right?” Alana walked back around Neva to get her response.
“Yeah, that feels better.” Neva said numbly.

When they were finally moving again, Neva felt almost comfortable enough to fall into a deep slumber. She felt clean, and in comparison to the rough hospital gown and slippers that she had woken up in, her new clothes felt like a soft blanket. Alana had even gone through her merchandise to find a sheath for her knife. Granted, it was too big and didn’t fit whatever type of knife Neva had, but it still helped. At least she didn’t have to tie it up behind her neck. Neva tilted her head back, allowing her eyes to slide closed. The wagon jolted suddenly, causing Neva to whack her head against the wooden headrest. “Gods, what was that?” She grumbled, rubbing the already forming bump on her head.

“We just got into Leigh. That was the transition from the dirt road to the cobblestone.” Alana replied.

“Oh.” Neva sat up straight. She tried to memorize their path, tried to recognize buildings. Perhaps she had been here once? Nothing new had bubble in her memory since Alana had spoken of Immure. After countless twists and turns, and many shouts of greeting to Alana, she pulled onto a small dirt path that led to a medium sized house. It looked beautiful, two stories with round windows dotting the exterior. The building was made of a pale stone (as were most of the buildings in Leigh). “Is this your home?” Neva asked dumbly.

“Yes.” Alana smiled softly “It was my parents, but I inherited it.” Alana pulled the wagon up to the side of the house. “I need to ask you to do a favor while I brush down Marlo.” Alana turned her gold eyes onto Neva.

“Yes, of course.” Neva responded, immediately nervous of whatever task Alana was going to give her.

“I need you to go find The Knights Helm Inn. It’s not too far from here. You exit the property, turn right. You’re going to cross the road at the first intersecting street. Stick to the left side of the road. It should be on the left side of the street after four intersections.”

“Leave, turn right, four intersections, on the left side.” Neva repeated slowly.

“You got it.” Alana was pulling her fiery hair back to bind it into a bun. “Go in and ask for Caldwell Turner. Tell him you found me, I’m back, and I need him to come over.”

“Okay.” Neva replied, wondering why she didn’t go do it after brushing down the horse.
“Hurry back!” Alana called as Neva walked away.

Neva did as Alana said. She took slow careful steps off the property and turned right. The streets weren’t packed with people, but there were enough that Neva had to weave her way through them. She concentrated so hard on not running into anyone or making contact that after a moment she forgot how many street crossings she had passed. Keeping her composure, she took in her surroundings, hoping to see something that was familiar and would guide her back to Alana’s. Buildings rose up around her, their windows alight with a soft yellow glow. When that didn’t work, she tried to call the directions back into her mind, but it was no use.

Neva was officially lost.