No Place for Women

Kila's POV

"I'll take the first watch." I said as we found a small place to rest for a few hours.

Fili nodded, his arm was wrapped around Calili's shoulder, and she was helping him to sit down. I never noticed how bad his injury actually was when we were out on the ledge. Wow, some friend I am. I was too worried about Calili to ask about him. The one that had risked his like to protect me, but I was too worried about my little sister and his brother.

I sat against a rock near the front of a little cave that we had found. Kili had done what he could to start a little fire between them all. They made a small meal, and Kili brought me a small bowl of it.

"Ahh!" I shouted, dropping the bowl.

Kili quickly placed his bowl down on the ground before he grabbed my hands, "What's wrong?"

"Nothing. " I mumbled.

"When did this happen?" He said look at the deep cuts that were placed on the palms of my hands.

"Back when we got seperated on the ledge. And then made deeper whenever I fell on the way here." I explained to him.

Carefully, Kili took his jacket off and placed it around my shoulders, just like he always did. Then he ripped two small strips from his shirt and ringed out all the water before wrapping them around my hands. I cringed a bit when it touched the broken skin, but the pain faded the more I got used to having the bandages there.

"Why didn't you tell me you were hurt earlier?" He sighed.

"I didn't want you worrying. I mean this isn't as bad as your arm. It's nothing compared to that." I shrugged.

"It may not be as bad as this cut, but it's still an injury and its still hurting you so I'm going to worry either way. So shush about that." He laughed. "Now try to eat your soup and get some sleep. You'll need it."

"I can't sleep. I'm taking the first wake. So why don't you take your own advice." I stuck my tongue out at him as I reached out to grab the bowl.

"Do you ever sleep? I've only ever seen you sleep twice at the most since I met you, and other than that you're always insisting on taking watch even when Thorin puts someone else in charge of it, you sit up with them when you should be sleeping! Why do you do that?"

"It's what I'm used to." I shrugged.

"What do you mean?" He took a bite of his food.

"Whenever we're out in the wild, I'm used to never sleeping. I'm always looking after Calili, "My voice was hushed, " I never slept because I knew that once I adusted my body to never sleeping, that she needed it and I didn't. As simple as that. I was the one always awake and never sleeping just to take care of her. I've never had a true home, so I put myself out in the wild; but I never knew that she was going to follow me. When she did, I swore that I would protect her no matter what happens. "

Kili stayed absolutely quiet, eating his supper as my eyes found my little sister. She seemed happy where she was sitting with Fili, her bowl of supper in her. I didnt want to take that happiness away from; I'd honestly would never want to take that happiness away from her. I've never seen her this happy...ever.

"Can I ask you something?" Kili said.

I nodded silently, breaking my eyes away from my sister and looked up into Kili's eyes.

"That night at the lake, before you stormed off, why did you yell at Balin like that?" His voice seemed shy when he said that.

I brought my knees up to where they wereup against my chest, and I wrapped my arms around them. The memory of the night I was fighting with Balin flashed through my head as if it had only just happened.
"Don't you dare talk to me like you know all my problems. Don't you dare talk to me about that man!" I screamed. "You don't know anything about me, so why don't you just leave me alone, okay?"

"I just. "I sighed, "I felt like he was compairing me to Thorin, and he just kept going on about my dad."

"He didn't mean anything by it, love. " He sighed, "I'm sure he just wanted you to know what a great person Mortri was."

I couldn't help but feel anger rise up in my chest as I turned to look at him. But it faded in a matter of seconds.

"You knew him?" It wasn't anger that I thought I was feeling, it was shock.

He nodded, "Fili and I were very young, but yes we knew him. He was always around uncle Thorin, especially when Thorin was taking care of us when our mother was away or just too busy to watch us. Thorin and Mortri were the ones that were always watching us and the ones who were always there for us when we needed someone to talk to. " He paused, "I can remember that he always used to talk of this woman, and how much he loved her. Also, he would talk of two little girls, always saying they were about mine and Fili's age. I remember Thorin told him all the time that they would find you, and bring you back together as a family. But then Mortri died in battle one day, and Thorin always said that he would still bring your family back together no matter what it took. He always said that one day once we got our home back, no matter how long it took, he was going to bring you and Calili home, to your real home. With the Dwarves."

My eyes once more found Calili. She was smiling, what had to be the biggest smile I've ever seen on her face. In fact that smiles been there ever since the first night that we had met Thorin and the rest of the Company. Sure there may have been some awkward times, but there's always been the greatest times ever since we met them.

"You know," I said suddenly, "I planned on taking Calili, after we reached the bottom of the mountain, and leaving. I thought that this sort of life was way too dangerous for her; but now that I think about it, now that I think about all that you just told me, I don't think I'm going to do that anymore. I've never seen her as happy as she has been with everyone in this Company; especially Fili." I paused again, "I've decided that it's for the best if we stay here. If I stay here, with you." I smiled as I grabbed his hand.

"Good. Because I don't want you to leave the Company. Better yet, I don't want you to leave me."