No Place for Women

It was dawn when I moved to wake everyone up from their much needed sleep. Though it was hard for even me to even wake up Calili from where she looked so peaceful where she was sleeping next to Fili. She looked so cute where she was laying with him; I'd never seen her like this, at all .

But I pushed through that and woke her up anyway. I knew she probably wouldn't like me for that fact, but I didn't care. We had to get moving and soon. We were already behind. We were only supposed to stop or a good hour or two and then make our way down the mountain to be able to camp at the bottom while waiting for the Company to meet up with us; but no, we stopped for a good six to eight hours. I may have dozed off for a little bit, and when I woke up I couldn't bare to wake any of them up.

It was hardest for me to wake Kili up. His leather jacket was still around my upper torso keeping me warm from the cold weather that was around us. Kili had long sleeves covering his arms, and he said that he was warm enough. He had my cloak folded up under his head, and his eyes were closed; still sleeping peacefully where he had chosen where the lay in the small cave we had found.

"Kili." I whispered, shaking his shoulder, "Kili, I need you to wake up now. We've gotta go."

He groaned slightly, rolling over and grabbing my wrist. I looked down at where he hand was wrapped around my wrist, and he pulled me down next to him, with his arm wrapped around me, holding me tightly close to him. That's when his eyes opened. He smiled, and looked down at me before pressing his lips against the top of his head.

"I just want to lay here. I don't wanna go anywhere." He sighed.

"I know, but you can do that once we get our home back." I smiled, looking up at him.

"Did...did you just say our home?" He asked, looking down shocked at me.

"Yes." I nodded, "I may have never been there before Smaug took your home, but it's our home now too. Where ever you and Fili go, Calili and I are going to be by your side. Through thick and thin, we're always going to be there no matter what. I promise you that. Where ever you go, I'll be following."

My words seemed to have make a large smile break out over his face. His arms seemed to tighten around my body as he held me even closer to him. Though his smile just seemed to keep growing where it was on his face.

"Now, come on we have to go meet your uncle and the rest of the company." I smiled before kissing his nose.

Before he could say anything about not wanting to go and just wanted to stay where we were, I slipped out of his grasp and went over to where Calili was standing.

"Are you ready to go?" I asked as she clipped the cloak around her neck.

That's when I noticed that she had changed. Last I had noticed before she had gone to sleep last night, she was still in her black dress that we had recieved from Rivendell. The ones that were gifts from Lord Elrond. Though now she was wearing the only other clothes she had, which where almost completely identical to mine. They were rather tight pants, with a brown and black corset. While mine were the same pants, but where her corset was brown, mine was black. Where hers was black mine was brown. And on our feet were knee high boots that kept our feet safe while we were travelling. Though we usually did go barefoot, upon realizing all the things we would be going through while on this so-called adventure, I told Calili it would most likely be best to wear our shoes.

"Yeah give me just a minute. I just need to put my shoes back on and then I'll be ready." She explained.

"Wait, why'd you take them off?" I asked her, not quite understanding.

"They got soaked last night when we were out in the rain. I thought it'd be best to take them off when sleeping or else I know I'd end up getting sick. Remember what happened last time?" She laughed.

That I did remember. It was all my fault too. It was one night when we were leaving Rivendell from a visit with our mother, back before we had gotten used to being barefoot in the wild. It had been raining nonstop ever since we arrived in Rivendell, and when we left it had stopped thankfully. Though the ground was still soaked and there were giant puddles everywhere. We were stupid enough back then to walk through every single puddle, and keep our shoes on that night while we sleeping; when the air had gotten colder around us. Two days later we ended up pretty sick, and Radagast made us stay with him; so he would take care of us.

"Of course I remember." I nodded with a smile, "Just make sure you're reaedy here in a few minutes. Alright love?"

She nodded her head silently, and I walked away from where she was standing. Then I made my way to where Fili was standing, looking slightly confused as he was looking all over the small area where he was standing. Noticing one of his small knives on the ground, I picked it up, and tapped on his shoulder lightly.

"Looking for this?" I smiled.

"You're a life saver, yes!!" He smiled, hugging me quickly, "I've been looking for this all morning! If you wouldn't have found it, I doubt that I would've been able to and then I would've been in such a bad mood!"

"Fili," I laughed, "It was right behind you, sitting on the rock where you had put all of them last night."

"Oh...well thank you. Now I feel like such a complete idiot, but still, thank you." He chuckled, placing his hand on the back of his head, "We all ready to leave yet?"

"I do believe we are." I smiled, nodding my head, "You were the last one that I had to make sure was awake and ready to go. Calili I believe woke up whenever you woke up earlier. While I had to take extra time to wake Kili up, which took what seemed like forever. Does he always sleep like that? I don't see how you, or Thorin or even your mom was able to put up with that. Although I have to confess, if we didn't have to go meet up with the Company, then I think I would've just laid there with your brother forever."

"Kila! You're rambling there sis." Calili laughed from the entrance of the cave.

I felt a small heat come over my cheeks, before looking up at Fili and whispering a small sorry to him. I hate it when I do that. I feel like it makes me look like an absolute fool. I think it's because the fact that as children, living out in the wild I was never able to tell people about who I am or the things I've done or what I feel, because Calili already knew. She was there every second of the day, so I wasn't able to tell her; it would just annoy her. I guess that's what comes with being sisters. I don't mind that. And it's not like I could tell our mom either. Whenever we were in Riveendell, she was always talking to Calili about things; she never did anything that had anything to do with me unless it was trying to pawn me off on Lord Elrond.

"Don't worry about it, love." Fili laughed, "Everyone gets a bit carried away sometimes. It doesn't matter. Besides, I love hearing about the way you feel. I'm a good listener, I'm always here if you feel like you can't talk to Kili or Calili. Remeber that."

I watched in silence as he walked over to where my little sister was standing. He place his hand on her lower back before pressing his lips to the side of his forehead. A smile quickly formed on her lips, and I could hear her laugh. Just like before, it was a side of her I had never seen before. She was just so happy, and no matter what happens while we are with the company, I'm not about to take that happiness away from her.

"Are you ready, love?" Kili smirked, walking over to me.

I laughed sarcasticly and stuck my tongue out at him as he stood there just smirking at me. I nodded, and told him that yes I was in fact ready to go, before saying that we should try to get moving to be able to meet up with the Company in time. Just like Fili had done to Calili, he placed a hand on my lower back, but instead of kissing the side of my head, we simply made our way over to where Fili and Calili were standing.

"Let's go!" I smiled.

Though I couldn't help but have memories of when we were in Rivendell flashing through out my mind. Memories of when our mother was trying to pawn me off on Lord Elrond mostly. It was horrible, the main thing that made me stay away from Rivendell most of the time; mostly only going when it was absolutely possible. Which was usually a rare time. It seemed that at times, after spending so long away from our mother, Calili would start getting upset for no reason; so that's when we would go to Rivendell.

I would never really get to spend much time with our mother in the first place. Whenever we would arrive, she was the one to greet us, not Lord Elrond. It was as if Radagast had told her that we were coming; but as soon as we would arrive, she would greet us and dive into a conversation with Calili about everything that she was going through. Like I didn't even exsist. And when she realized that I was still there, she would tell me that she set up a dinner with Lord Elrond. Or how Lord Elrond had delivered somethign to her for me. A present of sorts. That's actually how I got my sword.

Though I never told Calili. It's not that I didn't want to tell her, or that I didn't trust her enough to tell her, she's my sister, of course I want to tell her. But I never did. The fact that our mother was trying to pawn me off to Lord Elrond, which made it seem like she was trying her hardest to keep us from going back to the Green Wood, would kill Calili. I'm not entirely sure of how she would take the news about it, but I know that she wouldn't like it. She wouldn't be happy about it at all. And I don't want her to ever be upset. It's the worst thing in the world that I had ever experienced. Well other than the feeling I had of loosing her on the mountain of course. It came second to that to being the worst feeling I've ever experienced.

Calili and Fili were in the front of the group, walking down the path with smiles on their faces as they were talking to each other. It didn't seem like there was any danger anywhere around us, which was slightly strange. Ever since we joined up with the Company, there seemed to be danger everywhere. It put me on edge, I kept my eyes open, looking every where at once to make sure to be ready just in case something did happen.

"Are you alright?" Kili whispered.

"Yeah I'm fine." I nodded, "Just thinking about everything. The things I said this morning."

I wasn't lying, what I had said to him this morning was on my mind as well as all the other things. It's not that I was lying about it to get him up and moving, or that I was lying in general, because I wasn't. I meant every single word of it, but I just couldn't seem to get it out of my head.

"What are you thinking about it? Do you not want to stay with me anymore?" He had such a sad look on his face.

Immediately I stopped walked, and place a hand on his cheek; causing him to stop walking as well and look down into my eyes. Fili and Calili hadn't noticed that we stopped, and they just kept walking. We could catch up.

"Don't you dare think for a singular second that I didn't mean it, do you hear me? I told you before and I'll tell you again, where ever you go is where I belong and don't you ever forget it. No matter what happens, no matter where you go I'll always be the one by your side."

A smile formed on his face, before he leaned down and pressed his lips against my own for what seemed like only a fracture of a second. I loved it. As he pulled away from me, his hand reached down and intangled his fingers with my own; all before we started walking again. We didn't walk fast, or even try to catch up with the other two. We walked at our own pace, in our own time. Just enjoying the time we had together in this moment, not knowing how much time we'd have together in the future. You can never know what will happen until the time comes.

I had so many questions running through my head as I was walking with him; you can never know the answers unless you ask all the right questions. Though in this moment, none of them seemed important; at all. All that seemed important to me in this moment, was the happiness of the dwarf that was walking by my side. As long as he was there for me, as long as he was happy, as long as he was by my side then I knew that everything was going to be alright.