Status: Updated often!
Letters to Those Whom I Love
To the one I spent nine months with
Dear Erik,
I am laying here in my bed at my moms. I'm doing nothing over here but getting drunk. I left you two days ago and everytime i get out of bed i get a beer or some vodka. This morning i still feel a little buzz from all the drinking last night until four in the morning .
You broke me during those nine months we were together . You called me fat and ugly. you said no one wants me and no one ever will. You told me I'm nothing . You made me pay for everything . i paid lights and rent. I laid for your beer and cocaine. You hit me more than one time and made me me lose all my friends. I'm nothing now.
You were only mad because I became best friends with your friends. You told me in the mexican culture i am a bitch. You got mad because they said to leave you. They said I'm a good girl. They told you all the time how they wish they had a girl like me. It made you jealous. You hated me for that.
I had your child in my stomach growing. I showed you five tests. And yet you called me a liar. You hit my stomach pver and over calling me fat. You said you didn't love me. That was last November and i still stayed. I knew you had problems for your own.
And yet sometimes Erik you held me all night. You said without me your nothing. You told me I'm beautiful and perfect. When i cried you would stay by my side. When i sang in the car to the radio you wod take my hand and sing along with me. I would laugh because your mexican accent would come out. You meant everything to me. And still everyone said to leave you.
All you ever wanted was the bitches but i still held you when you cried. When you got drunk I put you tl bed. I cooked every fucking night for you. When you asked how much i loved you I told you i can't put into words. When you wanted sex i gave it to you everytime. When you told me you loved bitches i tried harder for you.
Two days ago when i left you a lot of people were outside. It was a beautiful day in SC. Well i heard you say fuck you bitch but i kept walking and i didn't look back but i heard crystal and linda and shakir and jose and boogie and shorty and ms lee all saying she did it. and clapping. i heard she's free and i knew i couldn't disappoint them.
At this moment i want to come back to your arms. Come back to my home. come back but i can't. And when i think these thoughts i think of when you cheated on me. how one hour after we broke up you were there at the store with your hands down
I am laying here in my bed at my moms. I'm doing nothing over here but getting drunk. I left you two days ago and everytime i get out of bed i get a beer or some vodka. This morning i still feel a little buzz from all the drinking last night until four in the morning .
You broke me during those nine months we were together . You called me fat and ugly. you said no one wants me and no one ever will. You told me I'm nothing . You made me pay for everything . i paid lights and rent. I laid for your beer and cocaine. You hit me more than one time and made me me lose all my friends. I'm nothing now.
You were only mad because I became best friends with your friends. You told me in the mexican culture i am a bitch. You got mad because they said to leave you. They said I'm a good girl. They told you all the time how they wish they had a girl like me. It made you jealous. You hated me for that.
I had your child in my stomach growing. I showed you five tests. And yet you called me a liar. You hit my stomach pver and over calling me fat. You said you didn't love me. That was last November and i still stayed. I knew you had problems for your own.
And yet sometimes Erik you held me all night. You said without me your nothing. You told me I'm beautiful and perfect. When i cried you would stay by my side. When i sang in the car to the radio you wod take my hand and sing along with me. I would laugh because your mexican accent would come out. You meant everything to me. And still everyone said to leave you.
All you ever wanted was the bitches but i still held you when you cried. When you got drunk I put you tl bed. I cooked every fucking night for you. When you asked how much i loved you I told you i can't put into words. When you wanted sex i gave it to you everytime. When you told me you loved bitches i tried harder for you.
Two days ago when i left you a lot of people were outside. It was a beautiful day in SC. Well i heard you say fuck you bitch but i kept walking and i didn't look back but i heard crystal and linda and shakir and jose and boogie and shorty and ms lee all saying she did it. and clapping. i heard she's free and i knew i couldn't disappoint them.
At this moment i want to come back to your arms. Come back to my home. come back but i can't. And when i think these thoughts i think of when you cheated on me. how one hour after we broke up you were there at the store with your hands down