Mad World

Stacy said she needed to tell me something important today.
What did she need to tell me that was so important?
We've been together for almost two years now and we'd pretty much said and did everything that was important in a committed relationship.
Except sex.
So, what was it now that was so important?

As I arrived at St. Frances Chastain Prep School, I immediately saw Stacy and caught up with her. It was almost hard to find her in the crowd of students all wearing matching navy blue and white uniforms. the only thing that made her stand-out was her bright orange hair. I jogged to her and kissed her forehead.

"Hey, babe, what was it you need to tell me?" I asked.

"I'm dumping you." she said nonchalantly.

I was taken aback and blinked in confusion as if I hadn't heard her right. "Wait, what?"

"We're not working out, Gerard. I can feel a distance between us and I think I'm in love with someone else." Stacy was talking without sympathy or any kind of feeling toward me. She looked at me with eyes filled with boredom.

"Distance? We're together everyday." I pointed out.

"Yeah, see, that's another thing. A girl needs her space." she stated with a shrug.

That's when a jock, named Kaleb, swooped her up in his arms, shot me a look of disgust, and kissed Stacy's temple. She giggled and kissed his cheek. As they walked off down the hall, I watched in disbelief, mouth open, eyes wide. I just couldn't believe it had happened. And it happened fast.

I was mopey all day. And really angry. And I'm never angry.

When my pencil broke in French class, I erupted with so many cuss words, it shocked the entire class. My teacher said my name in utter disbelief. I apologized and started cussing the same words, but in French.

Later in Chemistry class, we got a new student, named Frank, and the teacher made him sit by me.
That meant I had to catch him up on what we were learning and I really didn't feel like making any sort of human contact after this morning. So I explained everything to him, but in little snipets.

"I still don't understand." he said slowly.

I sighed in exasperation and crumbled my worksheet into a ball. Frank tensed and stared at the table.

"Then maybe you should ask the teacher for a new chemistry partner then." I said, looking into his green eyes. Frank was much smaller than me, literally petite for a guy. He rolled his eyes and walked to the teacher's desk. I sighed again and chewed my bottom lip. Mr. Robertson and Frank made their way to me.

"Alright, Gerard, what's going on?" Mr. Robertson asked.

"I'm just having a bad day." I admitted.

"Well, don't take it out on Frank, okay. Go work out in the hall. Frank, go sit with Kaleb and Dawn, okay."

I gathered my books and went out into the hallway. I stared at the ceiling, fiddling with my pencil and thinking about how harsh I was to Frank. Taking out all my anger for Stacy and Kaleb on Frank. It wasn't fair, I'll admit it. But how could Stacy do that to me? That conniving bitch just dumped me and acted like we didn't have years worth of history together that we cherished so much.

Well, I know I cherished them. I don't know why she'd done it though. She said we were too distant, and then she said she need her space.
And that she was in love with someone else.
Kaleb.

I subconsciously broke my pencil in half and tossed it to the side. I wished so bad that it was Kaleb's spine.

When the last period bell rang, I stood slowly, gathered my books in my arms and walked in the direction of my last class, Art.
Bless Art class. It was my daily escape of reality.
And that's what I really needed right now.

"Hey, man," Frank said catching up with me. "No hard feelings, right? I didn't mean to get you in trouble."

I shook my head and tried not to be such an asshole. Because at heart, I wasn't an asshole unless someone was an asshole to me first.

"Don't worry about it, man. It's cool." I said indifferently.

"So, what happened? Why're you having a bad day?"

"Well," I began with a heavy sigh. "My girlfriend just heartlessly dumped me."

"Aw, man, that sucks. I'm so sorry."

"She should be sorry. Not you. And, don't feel sorry for me. It's annoying." It really was. And I can honestly say that without being an asshole.

"What's your next class?" he asked abruptly.

"Art." I answered simply.

"Oh. I have English. But, I don't know where the room is. Mind helping me?"

"The tardy bell's about to ring." I said pointedly as we arrived to the Art room.

"Oh, okay. Maybe I'll get lucky and find it on my own. I'll just be really late." he chuckled as he turned down the hall.

I chewed my bottom lip and ran after him.

"I can have one tardy on my record." I said as I walked beside Frank.

"No, no! Go back!"

The tardy bell rang.

I shrugged. "Too late now." I smiled. He smiled back, blush crept on his cheeks. He was blushing? Why? I shook the useless thought away. Everyone blushes. "Upstairs." I absently mumbled.

Frank immediately turned to the stairs and climbed them alongside me. As we arrived at Mrs. Kostoff's classroom, Frank thanked me for the billionth time. Frank and I explained to her that I'd escorted him to his class and that I needed a note for Mrs. Carlisle to know where I was and excuse my tardiness.

Back in the Art room, our objective for the day was reviewing value and contrast. I was the first to finish. Like always. I was the top student in Mrs. Carlisle's class. And the most experienced. Since I'd finished, I got to free-draw.

But what was I going to draw? What was I feeling?

Anger.
Heartbreak.
Loneliness.

I got to work in my sketchpad. I drew a small figure of a boy that symbolized me. There were Slenderman-like tentacles coming from my back, my hands holding a broken heart out in front of myself. I scribbled a crude, sketchy black aura around myself. Outside the aura, I wrote out Stacy's cruel words in bold, spidery lettering.

I'M DUMPING YOU.
WE'RE NOT WORKING OUT.
I CAN FEEL A DISTANCE BETWEEN US.
A GIRL NEEDS HER SPACE.
I THINK I'M IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE ELSE...

"Gerard," Mrs. Carlisle's voice carried to my side. Her eyes averted from my drawing to me. "Is there something bothering you that you'd like to talk about?"

I've been in Mrs. Carlisle's class for two years now and I trusted her with my life. I trusted her with all my secrets. She was my friend.

"Stacy dumped me." I mumbled so no one else could hear but her.

Mrs. Carlisle crouched beside me and frowned. "In my opinion, she didn't deserve someone as kind-hearted as you. And let me tell ya a dirty little secret. I was Stacy's art teacher in middle school and she was a total slut bucket."

I erupted with laughter because it was unnatural to hear a teacher say such a thing about a student.

She smiled and continued. "She flirted with every guy, wore her blouses halfway unbuttoned, skirt that almost showed the bottom of her ass cheeks, fishnets, push-up bras and #5 Hooker Red lipstick. Now, if I would've gone to school like that, my parent's would have dumped me in a Catholic school. That poor girl needs Jesus."

I laughed the entire time. Mrs. Carlisle knew how to cheer me up when I wasn't feeling good. Physically and emotionally.

"You're a good guy, some girl will be lucky enough to snatch your heart and cuddle it rather than play with it and then break it like a shiny new toy."

"I hope you're right." I said.

She straightened, winked at me, and walked across the room to her desk to answer an email.

I didn't like a lot of girls at this school. A lot were either unattractive, snobby, whores, or secretly lesbian. And no one at St. Frances took nice to homos. What did all the guys see in these girls? And then I began to wonder what Frank thought about the girls. What he thought about the people.

What'd he think about me?