And Only Surrender Will Help You Now

Settle down with me
And I'll be your safety
You'll be my lady

I was made to keep your body warm
But I'm cold as the wind blows so hold me in your arms

~ Ed Sheeran
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The butterflies had already taken over her stomach when Kate woke up the next morning, and they weren't good butterflies either. But the only thing running through her head was Brian and his words from the previous day. Sitting back against the headboard, Kate covered her face with her hands.

What the hell is going on with me?

A glance over at the clock told her that she still had around two hours before Judy and her daughters would wake her up. Kate decided to use that time to think about everything. The wedding. Brian's family. And whatever feelings she had. What she was feeling for Brian came first on the list though.

Kate hadn't really been close to anyone since her parents passed away, and she wasn't even that close to them. The time between ages nineteen and... well, now, she'd never been in a even remotely serious relationship. Kate was always very focused on her job which never left very much time for anything else.

And then this happened and Brian came along. Brian who somehow managed to weasel his way into her hard shelled heart with his amazing personality and equally amazing family. He managed to do that while no one else had.

It seemed as if Kate had been pondering this whole thing for longer than she thought as there was a knock on the door before Judy poked her head inside.

"Rise and shine, sleepyhead! It's your wedding day!"

Practically skipping through the room, Judy pulled aside the curtains, the room filling with sunshine. Next she went over to the bed and sat down on the edge, having calmed down it seemed.

"How're you feeling? You nervous?" She asked and patted Kate's entwined hands laying in her lap.

"Just a little nervous, otherwise I'm fine," Kate answered and gave her mother-in-law-to-be a very convincing smile, but it was a fake smile nonetheless.
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The entire day seemed to just fly by way too quickly for Kate's taste, and soon enough it was time to go to the church. Kate herself had barely done anything during the day besides showering, Brian's mother and sisters had taken care of make up and hair fixing while she'd mostly been lost in her own thoughts.

She agreed though when Judy suggested they bring the dress to the church instead of Kate wearing it on the way there and wrinkling it too much.

The car ride over was only a few minutes long and the whole time Kate was playing with her fingers. If anyone noticed the way she was acting, they probably blamed it on pre-wedding jitters. The men in the Boyle family hadn't been present at the house since early that morning before they left to get ready over at Brendan's place.

Since it was such a short notice and intimate wedding, there would be no bridesmaids or groomsmen which made the whole ordeal easier since there was no need to order matching dresses in different sizes with only one day before the wedding.

All the Boyle women were dressed and all done before they left the house, and everyone except Judy was fixing some last minute things in the main room of the church or looking after the guys. Kate had nearly had a heartattack earlier when she found out that practically the entire New York Rangers roster was there, together with their head coach. But, of course, she couldn't show that.

Things had calmed down since then and only Judy and Kate were present in one of the back rooms. The older woman had just finished helping Kate into her wedding dress and placed her hands on the redhead's shoulders.

"You look absolutely beautiful."

Judy's choked up voice almost made Kate's eyes tear up, but for an entirely different reason.

"Thank you so much for everything, Judy. I couldn't have done it without you," Kate told her and Judy didn't hesitate to pull her into a hug.

"You're welcome, sweetie," she sniffed and pulled away. "I'll leave you alone for a while. I know it must be quite a lot to take in."

Kate's only answer was a nod, and she waited until the door was closed before letting out a shuddering breath.

"Okay, Katie. Pull yourself together. You can do this."

She used her minutes alone to look herself over in the mirror. Kate's red hair had been curled into loose ringlets hanging over her shoulders and her make up carefully applied to only enhance her natural looks. Knowing that she'd most likely drive herself crazy is she stayed, Kate stepped out of the room to wait for her que to walk down the aisle.

Through the doors she could hear the guests speaking with eachother until they went silent as the band started playing. The bouquet of lilies in her hands shook slightly as Kate waited for the part of the song where she would enter through those doors.
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Everyone stood and turned their heads to look at the double doors as they opened. All eyes were on the lone redhead walking down the aisle. And Brian couldn't have looked away if he wanted to. Just like Kate, he'd spent lot of time earlier in the day thinking about and trying to put a label on what he felt towards her, but had given up. Now, when he felt his heart pounding, Brian didn't think anything of it and only continued to watch as Kate came closer and closer.

Since it was a short notice wedding, only half of the pews in the church were used as not everyone had been able to make it. Almost Brian's entire family was there, counting aunts, uncles and cousins, and his teammates. Friends of the family were there as well, all of them hadn't even met Kate, nor heard of her.

The bride couldn't help but feel slightly out of place. Kate's closest family were some distant cousins that she hadn't spoken to since her parents died, and her closest friends were the people she met at work. Now when she thought about it, her life was pretty sad. No life outside her job.

Not enough time seemed to have passed when Kate finally reached the altar, where Brian was waiting with his hand out. Placing her much smaller hand in his, Kate turned to the first row of pews and handed her bouquet to Julie Ann where she sat, and then stepped up the single step.

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today-"

Kate tuned the minister out in favour of sweeping her eyes over the guests one last time. Her gaze fell on Sean Walker, sitting in the last pew occupied by guests on Brian's side of the big room. The way he was looking at them made Kate uneasy, as if he knew what they were doing.

Which he probably does.

"I'm sorry."

All eyes returned to Kate when she interrupted the minister, who looked slightly offended. Withdrawing her hands from Brian's, she took a step back and turned to face the guests. Brian looked at her worriedly and leaned in towards her.

"What are you doing?" He whispered but was ignored.

"I can't do this."

The moment Kate uttered those words, everyone started whispering amongst eachother. They quieted down when she cleared her throat and started talking again.

"I'm so sorry, but there's something I have to tell you," a deep breath. "We've been lying to you- well, I've been lying to you. I forced Brian to pretend that we were engaged since I found out that I'm getting deported. I never thought this would happen. I never thought that you would take me in like this, care for me. And if you hadn't, I probably would have been able to go through with this.

"I had forgotten what it was like to have people care about me. And I'm so, so sorry for doing this to you. Which is why I can't go through with this wedding."

Kate wasn't able to continue looking at Brian's family, and turned to him instead. "I will uphold my part of the bargain. Don't worry."

Then, with determined steps, she started walking down the aisle, head held high but with a heavy heart and a sick feeling in her stomach. Kate only stopped long enough to tell Walker: "You're driving me to the airport." Since there was no way that she would spend hours in a car with him.
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Everyone stayed in their seats until Kate had left the room, Walker following her. The closing of the doors seemed to snap everyone out of their daze and as Brian made a move to follow his bride, he was swarmed by his family.

"Brian, what the hell is going on?"

"Was that true?"

"You two were lying this whole time?"

Brian didn't get enough time to answer a question before another one was fired off. Sighing, he just decided to speak over them. "Yes, it's true. Everything Katie said is true. She didn't want to be deported back to Canada, so we decided to help eachother out. And we're both really sorry. I'm sorry."

He then forced his way between Jennifer and Chris, through the rest of the guests in the aisle and out the doors. Instead of going back inside in search of some car-keys, Brian started running down the road towards his parents' house.

Bursting through the front door and continuing up the stairs, Brian approached the only room it would make sense to find Kate in.

"Kate?!"

But his old room was empty. The exact same way they'd left it with the exception of the wedding dress laying across the bed, accompanied by a folder of papers and a note. Brian picked up the note first and unfolded it, his brow furrowing as he read the words written with a slanted handwriting.

Brian,

I know we agreed on your family not finding out, that we'd only stay married for a short time before getting divorced, but I couldn't do that. Not anymore.
I'm sorry about getting you in trouble with your loved ones, but as I said, I will uphold my part of the agreement.

In this folder you'll find all the information I own concerning your... situation. Do with it as you please, keep it, burn it, it's all up to you.

And once again I just have to tell you how sorry I am for all the trouble I've caused you.

Take care,
Katie.

After reading what Kate had to say, Brian could only stare at the note in his hands. That's it? There was a knock on the door, and he turned to see Gabrielle standing there.

"How're you feeling?" She asked.

Brian didn't know the answer to that himself, so he decided to ignore the question all together.

"You know, I thought she was going to be the biggest pain in my ass. Everything was going along fine and then she goes and does this." He was once again looking at the small piece of paper, now crumpled in his large hand.

"Brian-"

"We had a deal! We had a deal."

Gabrielle only continued watching her brother and waited until she knew he'd be quiet, before saying: "You're in love with her."

Brian was about to protest when he found that he couldn't. Somehow his sister had figured it out before he did.

"Right me if I'm wrong," she told him and waited for the lies she knew would never come.

"What can I do?" It wasn't often he asked one of his sisters for advice, especially of this sort, but he only had one thing on his mind.

"You follow her to the airport, of course."

That was all the confirmation he needed.
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It seemed as if all the guests had left the church to gather at the Boyle house, but Brian didn't mind them as he ran down the stairs.

"Boyler, what's going on?"

"Where the hell are you going?"

But Brian ignored both questions from Michael Del Zotto and Ryan Callahan, and only stopped to ask: "Did any of you drive here?"

"Well, yeah."

"Yeah."

"I need to borrow a car."

Ryan and Michael shared a look before Cally held out his car-keys. "What do you need it for?"

Grabbing the keys, Brian was halfway out the door as he answered: "I'll tell you later."

Brian was across the yard and inside the car in record time. As he was about to drive off, the passenger door opened and Gabrielle hopped in.

"What are you doing, Gabby?" He asked.

"If you think I'm staying home for this, then you're out of your mind," she answered. "C'mon! Let's go!"
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The normally twenty minute drive to the closest airport only took ten, and that was because Brian was speeding as much as he could the entire way there. He somehow sped up even more when the airport came in sight. A sloppy parking later, and Brian and Gabrielle were running through the airport.

"Do you even know where her gate is?" She panted.

"No idea."

Gabrielle rolled her eyes at the vague answer but continued running after her brother. The not too big airport wasn't very crowded, which made it easier to get around, but even so they almost crashed into one of the employees. Since Brian was a man and preferred not to ask for directions, Gabrielle did.

"Excuse me, but do you know which gate the plane to New York City leaves from?"

"Yes, it's gate 12-" he didn't have the chance to continue since Brian was already running again, Gabrielle going after him, yelling: "Thank you!"

It was a good thing that Brian was as trained as he was, otherwise he never would have been able to run like this. Or maybe he would, if he happened to be in this very situation. Since he always drove between New York and Hingham, he really didn't have an idea of where he was supposed to go, but he continued running. They did manage to find the right gate, but just as they arrived Brian and Gabrielle could only watch as the plane pulled out and started towards the runway.

Gabrielle didn't know what else to do besides place a hand on her brother's shoulder and say: "I'm sorry, Bri."
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As Kate walked through Madison Square Garden the next day she kept her eyes cast downcast, not looking to meet anyone's eyes. Her previous night had been spent packing all of her things and emptying her apartment. She would be able to put in on sale while in Canada. Kate wouldn't be able to live in the States for at least a year and so she didn't see the point in keeping a apartment she wouldn't be able to afford to uphold while having to buy a new one in Canada.

Sean Walker had given her until 2:00 p.m. to get everything ready and also clean out her office before he would drive her to the airport.

Kate had avoided the curious looks of everyone she walked past in the hallways, they probably already knew everything. Now she was glad that she'd decided that even if she didn't work there anymore, she would be damned if she didn't look presentable. And so, Kate had pulled on her favourite pencil-skirt, blouse and high-heels. They may not be comfortable to travel in, but at least she didn't look the part of someone who just had to quit her job, leave everything she now knew behind, and return to the country she'd left at the age of twenty.

Since Kate had always been quite personal, she didn't have a lot of things in her office that she could bring. As a matter of fact, the only things she could place in her box was a couple of books as well as a pair of heels she'd left there once.

How sad can you get?

Well, it might be sad but at least the box was easy to carry.

Kate was one of the few to have a real office, otherwise it was mostly desks and cubicles, which meant that she couldn't leave unnoticed. Stepping out of her office and closing the door, Kate was met with the sight of more than ten of her co-workers who apparently had nothing better to do than stare.

"Katie."

Recognizing that voice she froze, still clutching the box in her arms. Taking a deep breath, Kate turned to the right where her only way out would have been if it wasn't blocked by Brian Boyle.

"Brian. What are you doing here?" She asked.

No answer.

"I told you that I would keep my part of the deal, didn't I?" Kate questioned, slightly irritated now. "I meant what I wrote in that note, Brian. I gave you all the information I had-"

"Shut up, Katie."

Her jaw dropped. "Excuse me?! Who the hell do you think you are?! Huh?!" Kate's voice rose and if they didn't already hold everyone's attention, then they did now. Some Rangers had been there since Brian had, but some arrived now together with Coach Tortorella. "Do you think that just 'cause you're Brian fucking Boyle you can just tell me to-"

But Kate didn't have a chance to finish as Brian pulled the box from her hands, threw in onto the nearest desk, grabbed the back of her neck and pushed his lips against hers. Kate's hands stayed raised in the air for a second or two before they were drawn to the heat constantly radiating from Brian, and grabbed onto the front of his shirt. And so she leaned up on her tiptoes, trying to gain some height, and pressed her lips harder against his.

Neither of them seemed to notice the dozen of eyes on them, or maybe they just didn't care. Kate seemed to come to her senses and broke this kiss, now using her hands to put some distance between herself and Brian, if only to be able to see his face.

"Don't tell me that's why you came here."

Brian looked down at her, one of his hands still weaved into her hair. "You know, I thought you were going to be a huge pain in my ass," he gave her a look when Kate opened her mouth to protest. "But somehow, don't ask me how, you managed to get under my skin. And don't I love you for that."

Kate's eyes, who'd been extremely interested in the threads of Brian's shirt, snapped up to stare at him.

"What?"

"C'mon, Katie. You not stupid, or deaf. You heard me."

Instead of asking him to repeat himself, Kate gave him a crooked grin. "A girl can dream, right?" She then got back on her toes and re-connected their lips. And instead of staring, Brian's team-mates started whistling and whooping.

"By the way, I love you too."

~ Finished.