Tomorrow Will Shine Again Golden

One year and three days ago, Jack had received a call early on a Friday morning.

As someone who was at work every day by seven thirty, his standard of early was skewed. Try…three fifty-seven a.m. So it was only understandable that he grumbled, “Somebody better have died.” He didn’t start with hello, didn’t check to see who it was. That was his answer.

He heard sobbing on the other end and, even in his sleepy state, he wanted to smack himself for what he’d said. Instead, he closed his eyes and asked, “What’s wrong, William?”

“Nolan had a stroke.”

Jack had his laptop out and was looking up flights before he managed to ask his next question. “Is he okay?”

“They’re looking at him now. Jack, you’re his favorite nephew.” Obviously. He’d known that for years. “I know it’s short notice, but it would mean a lot to him—and me—if you could come.”

Ticket purchased. “I’ll be there tonight.”

——

One year and two days ago, Jack anxiously paced in a waiting room.

Seventy percent of his mind was devoted to worrying about his absolute favorite uncle. That man had been there for him and helped him with so much. He’d helped him pay for what his parents and scholarships couldn’t cover for college and law school. When Jack had announced that he was moving, Nolan had immediately offered him his amazing house in Baltimore because he and his husband, William, decided to move across the country to Seattle. He was like a second father to him. He hated the idea that there was a chance he might die.

Five percent of his mind was busy worrying about his kids. He didn’t even know who was babysitting. What if it was some creep, or a teenage girl who invited her boyfriend over, or someone who took their house as an excuse to throw a huge party? Before he left, he’d made sure to tell Kell to casually mention that they have an excellent security system and he could watch the footage whenever he felt like it. But what if something happened?

The other twenty-five percent was dedicated to the same thing (person) that always took up too many of his thoughts.

——

One year and one day ago, Jack was on a plane back home. Nolan was going to be just fine—although he hadn’t been released from the hospital just yet—and William was in a more stable mental state than he had been. He took out his laptop and figured now was a good time to catch up on what had been going on at home. So he put in his earphones and watched.

The doorbell rang and Kellin answered.

“Holy shit!”

The old lady across the aisle glared at him and he realized he’d said it out loud. “Sorry,” he mouthed.

But seriously, holy shit!

The babysitter was Alex Gaskarth.

No, of course it wasn’t. It had to be someone else, someone that just looked like him. He didn’t even live near their area. Besides, surely he was at a better point in his life than to be babysitting strangers’ kids.

It wasn’t Alex. It was someone who looked remarkably similar. Who also happened to have set his couch on fire at age thirteen. Surely a lot of guys did that, right?

Then he introduced himself as Alex. There was no denying it. Out of all of the sitters in Baltimore, he’d somehow managed to hire his ex-boyfriend, who, as far as Jack knew, didn’t even live in Baltimore. What the hell were the odds? Jack considered calling an actuary so he could actually find out the odds. (Did they have time for things like this?)

He fast-forwarded a bit until dinner and noticed Alex choking. He started watching again. He was staring at the picture of Jack and his sons on the wall across from the table. So that must have been when he found out whose kids he was watching. The look on his face was priceless…but also painful.

Jack kept watching bits and pieces and fast-forwarding through others. “I’m in love with your dad?”

Did he really have the nerve to tell them that? Of course he did. This was Alex, after all. But surely that was the punchline of a joke he’d missed out on. “And there was a time, not too long ago, when he was in love with me too.”

Nope, he was really telling them that. And then Kellin said he had all their old pictures. Well, that was embarrassing. He was blushing, even though Alex wasn’t around to see it.

He learned a lot from the parts of the story he watched. He’d had a crush on him since fourth grade. Jack had always thought it started when they were twelve and kissed that one time. He apparently had a great memory because some of the details he threw in were so insignificant. He was offended to find out that Kellin had already had his first kiss and hadn’t even bothered to mention it to him.

He skipped through the night and played during breakfast, when they were continuing the tale of the first kiss. Jack remembered it differently than Alex told it. When he’d said it was weird, he meant he wanted to try again…he just didn’t know how to ask for it. He’d taken Alex not saying much as a rejection and assumed he didn’t feel the same way. His decision was that he should shrug it off; it was just a crush, after all.

Alex wanted to know how he was and if he was seeing anyone. He couldn’t help but feel pleased at the smile on Alex’s face when he found out he wasn’t. Did he really think he would, even three years later? After all, they’d said always and forever. He’d kept up his end of the bargain.

He watched the strange scene in front of him: he ex looking through pictures of them with his children. God, they’d probably need years worth of therapy to recover from this experience. Alex had that death-look in his eyes when they found a picture of Jack and his beard ex-girlfriend. At the time, he thought he’d liked her. But the more she cheated and they fought, the less he cared and the more he wished she was Alex. So when they broke up for good, he knew he had to get drunk enough to get up his courage to kiss him.

He couldn’t believe Alex was just sitting there, nonchalantly talking about underage drinking to his very underage kids. Something was wrong with him, just like it always had been. And the story of him on the pool table. While Alex didn’t remember all of it, Jack would be damned if he ever forgot that night. Not that he’d ever tell that story to Kellin and Christofer.

At the end of the second day’s worth of stories, the plane was only a few minutes away. He put his laptop away for two reasons. One, he wouldn’t have time to hear part three. But mainly, he didn’t want to hear how Alex would twist the story and make it seem like it was his fault. He didn’t want to know what spin he put on it to turn himself into the innocent victim who didn’t do anything wrong.

He went home and confronted Alex. Who told him to watch day three.

Jack broke down when he showed them the ring. Alex had been planning on proposing? And he still had the ring? He skipped ahead, unable to look away. He watched as Alex hugged his children extra tight and it dawned on him that if things had turned out just a little differently, those would have been Alex’s kids as well.

And he’d managed to mess it up.

Sure, Alex had been the one to fuck up, but they were both to blame for their split. Jack hadn’t given him a chance. After so close to eight years together, he’d dropped him just like that. He’d missed him so much and now he had his chance to maybe have him back. Could they ever get that back?

——

One year ago, Jack woke up next to Alex.

Well, that hadn’t happened in a long time.

His…fuck, what was he supposed to call him? Friend? Ex?…stirred and sat up. His hair was a mess and his eyes were sleepy and he looked just the same as he had the last time they’d shared a bed: adorable.

Before he could process what happened, he heard snickering from the partially opened door.

Well, damn.

And then Chris was bursting into the room, a huge grin on his face. “Are you and Alex back together?” he asked hopefully, while Kellin hung back, leaning on the doorframe, trying to act casual and keep a smirk from betraying him as he took in the fact that Alex definitely wasn’t wearing a shirt and his dad was sporting the very shirt Alex had been wearing last night.

They looked at each other. “Well,” Jack said slowly. “We still have a lot to talk over…but I do want to see where things go.”

Chris appeared satisfied and darted back out of the room. After he was gone, Kellin looked at them seriously. “I could hear you guys last night. I’m glad you found each other again, but please be quieter next time.”

Alex busted out laughing. Jack smacked him, so he buried his face in the pillow to muffle the sound while Jack fumbled for an appropriate apology. “Um…wow. I don’t know what to say except…uh, sorry about that…”

——

Eleven months and twenty-nine days ago, Jack and Alex sat down to really talk about their relationship.

Alex went over and hung out with Jack’s kids after school—both his and theirs; he was student teaching at a local middle school—until Jack got off work. Jack didn’t call attention to the fact that he was there for a few minutes because he was watching them interact. They obviously liked him, and he was actively listening to them while he helped Kellin with his homework. Alex had always been good with kids. If only he hadn’t given up on being a teacher.

Smiling, he finally cleared his throat. “I’ll give Alex back to you in a few,” he assured the disappointed boys.

So they talked. They told each other all about what they’d been up to the past three years. And he was overjoyed when he learned that Alex had gone back to school and was so close to being done. (Assuming he survived the whole student teaching thing. It sounded impossible to Jack.) “That’s fantastic! I knew you could do it!” he crowed, eyes shining. “I know I’m jumping into this, but…what do you see happening with us?”

Alex looked at him, his expression a mixture of hopeful and sad. “Well, I’d love to get back together. It’s been a while, so I don’t mind taking things slow if you want.”

“Based off what happened night before last, we’re not good at taking things slow,” Jack pointed out.

“Then what do you suggest?”

He bit his lip. He wanted to dive headfirst, in all honesty. He wanted everything to be just like it was. “I think that we’ve both grown some in the past three years. We’ve accepted that we made some mistakes that played a part in what happened and that it shouldn’t have happened like it did.”

“I cheated,” he clarified, not wanting to dance around the issue. “With a stripper.”

Jack winced. “Yes. And I made a huge fucking mistake by kicking you out. So what do you say? We suck at taking things slow and we have enough history that if you’re still in, I want to go back to how things were. What do you say?”

Alex nodded happily. “Only hell yes.”

——

Eleven and a half months ago, Kellin raised a very valid concern.

“Dad, Alex is over here, like, every night now,” he started.

“Mmhmm,” he acknowledged.

“You’re back together.”

“Indeed we are. Kell, we already discussed this. You are alright with it, right?”

“No, no, of course I am! I was just…” He looked down. “I was wondering when he’s gonna move in.”

——

Eleven months ago, Alex took the ring off his neck.

He presented it to Jack. “So, uh, this was meant for you. You can have it. If you want it, I mean.”

And Jack laughed.

“What?” Alex asked, eyes widening in panic. Was he being rejected?

“That is probably the lamest proposal I’ve ever seen or heard.” He kissed Alex’s forehead. “The answer’s yes, but you’ve gotta do a little better than that before you actually get that answer.”

——

Ten months and twenty-two days ago, Jack overheard a conversation between Alex and Chris.

“So are you gonna move in soon?”

He couldn’t see them, but he knew Alex was shrugging. “I don’t know. I mean, I want to eventually…but it really depends on what your dad wants, right? It’s his house. Besides, you guys might get sick of me.”

“No we won’t!” he protested.

“Then maybe it’ll happen sometime in the not-so-distant future.” There was another shrug. There had to be, to fill the brief silence before what Alex said next. “I want to ask him to marry him again, but I’m not sure if it’s too soon. We haven’t been back together that long.”

Jack wanted to shout along with his son when he shouted, “Do it, do it, do it!” Then there was a pause. “But make it really…weird.”

“Yeah,” chimed in Kellin’s voice. Dear god, were they all conspiring against him? “Make sure it’s original, not like a typical proposal. Don’t just get on your knee and hand him a box.”

——

Ten and a half months ago, Jack thought he was ready to say what neither of them had had the guts to flat-out say yet.

Alex was going over math notes with Kellin because, as Jack had admitted over a decade ago when they’d been in middle school, math wasn’t his strong suit and he was not the right person to ask for help on. Especially seventh grade math…that’s when it started to get confusing. But Alex just got it. It came so naturally to him, and he had the patience of a saint. Even for a struggling student like Kellin.

He wished he could do something to help, watching them from across the room with a textbook and notes spread out on the floor around them. His son was on the verge of tears. “I just don’t get it, Alex!” he exclaimed in frustration, running a hand through his hair. “Exponents and letters and agh!”

“Shh. Wanna know a secret?” he asked, eyes flicking to Jack for just a second.

“Sure…”

“Your dad was awful at math. He almost failed it in seventh grade.”

Kellin gasped and looked at him. “Really?”

Jack jumped in. “Really. I had a thirty-eight in the class.”

“How’d you pass?”

He joined them on the floor and nudged his boyfriend—really, what was he supposed to call him? Boyfriend seemed so vague and didn’t fully describe their relationship. “Alex saved me. He’s the best there is at math. He had a hundred average that year.” He looked at some of the notes. “Oh god…not that.” He closed his eyes, pretending to be in pain. To be honest, it wasn’t all pretending. The multiplication of exponents did cause him just the slightest bit of physical pain.

And two hours later, Kellin understood the concepts they were learning, his homework had been checked twice, and Alex had clarified several pages worth of notes.

It was wonderful having him around.

——

Ten months and one week ago, Jack knew he was ready to say it.

He called Alex as soon as he knew he was done with student teaching for the day. “I have to stay late tonight. Any chance you can watch Chris until I get home? Kellin’s at a friend’s house, or I’d just ask him.”

When he got home just a few minutes before midnight, he found Alex on the couch next to a sleeping Christofer. He had a notebook in hand and was furiously scribbling.

“Whatcha writing?” Jack asked, trying to peek over his shoulder.

“Update report on the class I’m student teaching for. I have to hand it in tomorrow morning,” he explained, not looking up.

He had a report due in the morning. Probably something crucial to becoming a teacher. He could’ve (should’ve) gone to his own apartment and typed it in peace and quiet. But instead, he was here. Because Jack had asked him to.

——

Ten months and one week (minus one day) ago, Jack said it.

A couple minutes past midnight, Alex closed his notebook. “I guess I need to get home. I’ve gotta type this up…you know my handwriting isn’t the best.” He yawned and stood up, stretching. He reached for a goodbye hug/kiss.

Wrapping Alex in his arms, Jack kissed the side of his head and whispered, “I love you.”

Alex sighed contentedly. “I love you too.”

——

Ten months ago, Jack asked an important question.

It was Kellin’s idea to do it this way, so if it didn’t work out, he could just blame him, right? But it would work, because he knew Alex and he loved stuff like this.

He slid the small blue box across the table. Alex raised an eyebrow at him. “Before you open it, it’s obviously not what you think because I’m still waiting for your appropriate proposal. That’s your job. But if you’re in this as much as I am and truly want to make things work this time around—and we know they will, right?—then it doesn’t make sense for you to still live at your apartment. My house is closer to the school you student teach at and are eventually gonna work at. So…will you move in with me?”

Alex opened the box and found a key to the house on a plain silver chain. “Cute,” he said. Then he realized Jack wanted an answer. So he gave him the only suitable response: “Fuck yeah.”

——

Nine months and seventeen days ago, Alex took Jack to a concert.

It was just a local band doing blink-182 covers with maybe a hundred people in attendance, but that didn’t matter. Jack took note of how Alex was continuously messing with his pocket. He wasn’t sure, but he had a hunch of what was in that pocket. He didn’t want to make assumptions, though. How embarrassing would that be?

Between songs, he swore he saw the singer nod at Alex. Then Alex kissed his cheek and said, “I’ll be right back.” And he was gone.

They started playing First Date, and there was no sign of Alex. Jack sighed, exasperated. Leave it to him to disappear during what used to be their song.

The music stopped halfway through and Alex’s voice came through the microphone. “Jack, our first official date was to a blink-182 concert. Unfortunately, they’re still kinda busy and I couldn’t get them here. You know I would have if I could have, though. This is the next best thing. No offense to you guys,” he added with a glance to the band.

“None taken. Being the next best thing to Blink is definitely a compliment,” the drummer said.

“Right. Anyways. We’ve been through a lot, Jack. The three years we were apart were the worst years of my life. I wanted to marry you before then and I want to now. Every time you smile, even after all this time, I melt inside. And as long as you still like my stupid hair and will always look at me with those eyes, then what do you say? Let’s make this last forever.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out the ring.

Jack walked up to the stage, tears pooling in his eyes. He repeated Alex’s words, “Only hell yes.”

——

One year and three days ago, Alex had found his way back into Jack’s life. He couldn’t help but be thankful for Nolan’s stroke. Because of that, Alex had been called to watch Jack’s kids. It was the snowball effect. One little event had a huge impact on Jack’s life.

One year and three days ago, Jack had desperately needed a sitter. He had no way of knowing who would show up at his door.

One year and three days ago, Jack hadn’t had any idea what was about to happen. He’d hopped on a plane and flown across the country without a clue that his life was going to change.

One year and three days ago, Alex’s kids decided that they loved their new sitter, before they even knew who he was and his past with their father. How were they supposed to know that he would end up being the Alex that Jack had dated for years? When they opened the door, they didn’t know who they were letting into their house.

One year and three days ago, Jack had gotten a second chance with the man of his dreams.

And today, he was marrying him.