You Were My Sunshine
I.
Darling, darling. Do you remember how we met? We were so young. Fuck, we were just kids. Barely seventeen.
Darling, darling. Do you remember when the most important thing was getting a bag of pot and spending the night high on the beach?
Sun bleached hair, tan skin. That's how we grew up in California. Do you remember when your skin faded and your eyes sunk? I can't recall, darling.
I do remember almost everything darling. From the day we met until time began to fade. Life was so beautiful. We almost made it so far.
Averee and Jon. That was us. Perfection.
I remember when your hand brushed my cheek, your face only inches from mine. You told me over and over that everything would be okay. You kissed me a lot. We were two kids, young and reckless. Young and beautiful.
Oh darling, there was no one better than you. You took my virginity on the beach when I was seventeen years old. We were stoned and we were so happy. In that moment, we both thought everything would be perfect. You were going to be a rockstar, darling. You were going to control the world with your voice. I was going to be your girl. The one everyone was jealous of.
I keep having the same god damn thoughts in my head though, darling. It was my fault. You deserved the whole world and more. Even when we were homeless at 21, nothing stopped you from smiling. We had money to live with but not money to afford a place.
"Hold your breathe baby, look at the stars. There's nothing to cry over. Life is beautiful."
Over and over and over again. I keep having the same fucking thoughts, darling.
We tried so hard to get away, to leave that small California town. But small towns have a way of dragging a person down and we were no exception.
Darling, darling. Do you remember the first time we heard about those little pills? I do. We were 18 years old and Sally Johnson had them for sale. She raved about them all night to you. I probably wouldn't be able to recall that night very well if I hadn't been so angry with her for flirting with you. But that is the only reason I can remember it so well. They were nothing then, we just wanted to smoke our worries away.
Marijuana never got old though, darling. It was always great. But there wasn't something about those damn pills that got to me. I know I'm guilty, darling. You should've just turned around and left the day we met and you'd be okay. Life has a way of fucking people over though.
Her name was Molly and I was in love with her just as you were. She was such an expensive habit but the most explosive I've ever experienced. Everything was so good with Molly. Especially the sex, darling. Can you remember how great it was? Because I'll never forget.
It was my fault. I just wanted some fucking Molly, darling. You know this. I didn't mean to make such a huge mistake but I did. I took all of it. The dumb bitch always left her stash in her car and we knew exactly where because she trusted us. I was 20 years old and already a hopeless addict. You were something else though, darling. You were perfect. You were just here to enjoy the ride. You weren't addicted, you were just like a surfer on a wave. You just wanted to have the experience. Darling, I know I was out of hand that night when I stole it. I know I was out of hand when I was lying on the beach gasping for air with you on top of me. I know I was out of hand when I started getting sick everywhere from all the dope. I know what I did was wrong.
But it wasn't your fault. And yet you were punished for it. Karma is such a cruel thing how it comes around on people. Karma could've taken anything else away from me. I wouldn't have given you up for all the drugs in the world, darling. I would've done anything. I just wanted you to be with me forever whether I was high or not. You were so perfect, darling.
Darling, darling. Do you remember when the most important thing was getting a bag of pot and spending the night high on the beach?
Sun bleached hair, tan skin. That's how we grew up in California. Do you remember when your skin faded and your eyes sunk? I can't recall, darling.
I do remember almost everything darling. From the day we met until time began to fade. Life was so beautiful. We almost made it so far.
Averee and Jon. That was us. Perfection.
I remember when your hand brushed my cheek, your face only inches from mine. You told me over and over that everything would be okay. You kissed me a lot. We were two kids, young and reckless. Young and beautiful.
Oh darling, there was no one better than you. You took my virginity on the beach when I was seventeen years old. We were stoned and we were so happy. In that moment, we both thought everything would be perfect. You were going to be a rockstar, darling. You were going to control the world with your voice. I was going to be your girl. The one everyone was jealous of.
I keep having the same god damn thoughts in my head though, darling. It was my fault. You deserved the whole world and more. Even when we were homeless at 21, nothing stopped you from smiling. We had money to live with but not money to afford a place.
"Hold your breathe baby, look at the stars. There's nothing to cry over. Life is beautiful."
Over and over and over again. I keep having the same fucking thoughts, darling.
We tried so hard to get away, to leave that small California town. But small towns have a way of dragging a person down and we were no exception.
Darling, darling. Do you remember the first time we heard about those little pills? I do. We were 18 years old and Sally Johnson had them for sale. She raved about them all night to you. I probably wouldn't be able to recall that night very well if I hadn't been so angry with her for flirting with you. But that is the only reason I can remember it so well. They were nothing then, we just wanted to smoke our worries away.
Marijuana never got old though, darling. It was always great. But there wasn't something about those damn pills that got to me. I know I'm guilty, darling. You should've just turned around and left the day we met and you'd be okay. Life has a way of fucking people over though.
Her name was Molly and I was in love with her just as you were. She was such an expensive habit but the most explosive I've ever experienced. Everything was so good with Molly. Especially the sex, darling. Can you remember how great it was? Because I'll never forget.
It was my fault. I just wanted some fucking Molly, darling. You know this. I didn't mean to make such a huge mistake but I did. I took all of it. The dumb bitch always left her stash in her car and we knew exactly where because she trusted us. I was 20 years old and already a hopeless addict. You were something else though, darling. You were perfect. You were just here to enjoy the ride. You weren't addicted, you were just like a surfer on a wave. You just wanted to have the experience. Darling, I know I was out of hand that night when I stole it. I know I was out of hand when I was lying on the beach gasping for air with you on top of me. I know I was out of hand when I started getting sick everywhere from all the dope. I know what I did was wrong.
But it wasn't your fault. And yet you were punished for it. Karma is such a cruel thing how it comes around on people. Karma could've taken anything else away from me. I wouldn't have given you up for all the drugs in the world, darling. I would've done anything. I just wanted you to be with me forever whether I was high or not. You were so perfect, darling.