I Would Have Kept You Forever

I listened as Kellan hung up. He came up behind me and I felt him hesitate. I turned to look at him and he sighed.
“I’m sorry, Maggie.” He said.
“You didn’t believe me.” I said. It wasn’t a question, nor was it an accusation. The truth of my statement was clear on his face. He shook his head, sighing.
“I just never thought he would actually break up with you. Even when he thought Brennan kissed you-he never-” I dropped my gaze. “Once he asked you out-I thought he would never let you go-we all did.” I sighed.
“It’s ok. I thought the same thing.” He, too, dropped his gaze.
“What are you going to do?” He asked. I shrugged, blinking my eyes rapidly to force back the tears.
“Did he say where he was?” I asked. Kellan shook his head.
“He just said he would meet us in Vancouver.” I bit my lip and took a deep breath. “Maggie, you know this isn’t your fault, right? Jackson just lost his marbles. I think he hit his head somewhere between here and there and he just needs to come to his senses.” Kellan said. I forced a smile.
“Who knows how long that would take.” I muttered.
“Mags-”
“What do I do in the mean time?” I asked miserably.
“You could stay here.” Cam suggested. I looked between my two friends.
“I can’t-” I started, but Kellan cut me off.
“Great-so it’s settled.” I sighed in defeat. “Where’s your stuff, Mags?” I gestured vaguely towards the door and both guys got up to go get my suitcases. Kellan plucked the keys out of my hand and kissed my forehead. I text Uncle Kevin to let him know where I was and I let Jamie know that I got here.
When Kellan and Cam came back upstairs, Kellan tried to get me to take his bed but I refused. I had no problem with sleeping on the futon in the living room. He wasn’t going to win on this one.
Cam had started filming Burlesque, so he was gone during the day most of the days, so I hung out with Kellan as he tried to distract me. I made dinner every night for them because they wouldn’t let me pay rent.
After about two weeks, Kellan had some plans during the day so I went with Cam to his set.
I just sort of stood in the back at first, watching Christina Aguilera and the other dancers practice, but then the strangest thing happened. Cher’s massage therapist didn’t show up. She wasn’t throwing some huge fit or anything-it was a sort of subtle conversation that Cam joined in on. I couldn’t hear what was being said, I could only see them talking. Cam said something, pointed to me and the other three people in the group, including Cher looked over. Cam gestured for me to join them and I walked over, carefully avoiding all the wires taped to the floor.
“Maggie, this is Cher, her assistant-Chuck, and the set coordinator, Roger. Guys, this is my very good friend, Maggie Spencer.” Cam introduced. I shook hands with them, remembering what one of my teachers said about firm hand shakes.
“Cam tells us you do massage.” Chuck said. I glanced at Cam, who steadfastly refused to meet my gaze.
“I went to massage school, yes.” I said.
“Cher’s massage therapist has failed to show up for her morning massage and she is having a hard time turning her head. Do you think you could help?” Roger said. I looked at Cher. How I wasn’t a puddle of goo on the floor-I’ll never know.
“I’ll certainly try to help.” I conceded. How could I say no to Cher?
“Perfect. Right this way, Miss Spencer.” Chuck said.
“Guys, I can take it from here.” Cher said, giving them polite smiles. I shot a look at Cam and followed her out the side door. She looked at me as we walked. “You seemed hesitant.” She commented.
“I don’t actually have a massage license.” I admitted.
“But you can do a massage, right?” She asked. I nodded.
“I just can’t get paid for it.” She looked me over.
“Are you ok with that?” She asked. I nodded.
“Perfectly. I just don’t want you to expect something professional.” I said. She chuckled.
“Why don’t you have your license yet?” She asked, showing me to the small massage room.
“I left school for personal reasons and now I’m looking into culinary schools.” I explained. She grinned.
“Whoever you marry is going to be incredibly lucky. You can massage him and make him dinner.” I laughed.
“Something like that.” My thoughts drifted automatically towards Jackson, but I forced them away, looking at the table and realized it was way too high for me-level with my hips.
“How tall is your therapist?” I asked.
“A couple inches taller than you-not much though.”
“Huh.” I mused and lowered the table. “Does your therapist usually do a full body Swedish massage?” I asked. She nodded. “And you said you’re having neck pain?”
“Correct.”
“Are you on any medication of any kind?” I asked. She shook her head. “Ok. I’m going to start you face down, under the sheet. Let me go wash my hands and I’ll be back.” I said. She nodded and I left, shutting the door behind me. I went to the ladies room and washed my hands thoroughly before walking back.

We were saying goodbye to a few of the crew members when Christina caught up with us.
“Hey-a couple of us are going out to dinner at Via’s. Did you two want to come?” She asked. I looked at Cam who was in the middle of a yawn.
“I won’t. I’m exhausted. But you can, Mags.” He said, nudging my arm. My stomach grumbled and that made up my mind for me.
“Sounds good.”
“You can ride with me, Maggie.” She said. I gave Cam a hug goodbye and followed her to her car.
“So, who’s Via?” I asked.
“This girl Cher and I know. It’s actually her dad’s restaurant, but she’s running it for the moment.”
“What’s her name?” I asked, the situation sounding familiar.
“Olivia Rogers.” She said. I smiled.
“I know her. She’s friends with my God-Father.” I said. Christina laughed.
“I’m not surprised. Between Via and her dad-they know just about everyone.”

We arrived and the group of five of us were seated. It was pretty late, around nine thirty, but the dining room was still pretty full. Across the aisle from us were seven guys, two of them had obvious tattoos and the other five were arguing about something. One of the guys with the tattoos nodded to Christina as we sat and his eyes lingered on me for a second. Our waitress brought us menus and the two tattooed guys got up and came over to say hi.
“How are you, Christina?” The shorter one asked. He had a lot more tattoos and a small gun charm hanging off a chain around his neck. He was slenderer, compared to his friend next to him, but still obviously well built. His friend was tall, like Kellan and muscular, all of his tattoos running into a sleeve on his left arm.
“I’m good, Brian. What about you?” He nodded.
“Can’t complain. You remember Pierre, right?” He asked, gesturing to his friend.
“Of course. This is my new friend, Maggie. Maggie, this is Brian Schechter and Pierre Bouvier.” I smiled. “Pierre is the lead singer for-”
“Simple Plan. I know.” I said, smiling at him. “It’s a pleasure.” He raised an eyebrow.
“You’re a fan?” I nodded.
“Huge fan.” He grinned.
“Then the pleasure’s all mine.” A young girl-maybe only a couple of years older than me, came over and slid her arm around Pierre’s waist.
“Gentlemen.” She greeted Pierre and Brian. I instantly recognized her as Olivia. She grew up in my neighborhood, so she wasn’t too surprised when she recognized me, too. “How are you, Maggie?” She asked. I shrugged, smiling politely.
“I’ve been better.” I said honestly. She laughed.
“Don’t let these two bother you.” I smiled in a very non-committal way. There was a lot of giggling from behind them and when they stepped apart, I could see David-the bassist-had stuck straws up his nose and was clapping his hands straight out in front of him like a walrus. I snorted and Olivia sighed.
“They’re supposed to go in your mouth, dumbass.” She said. Pierre laughed and Brian just shook his head. Via turned to Pierre. “Do something with him.” She said. He raised an eyebrow.
“Why don’t you? You’re the one he listens to.” Pierre replied. She just raised an eyebrow at him. He turned to me. “It was nice meeting you.” He said. I smiled before he shuffled back over to his table and smacked David upside the head, forcing the straws out his nose. Christina caught my eye and grinned.
“He likes you.” I shook my head.
“He was just being polite.” I said.
“Girl-I only know him in passing. They wouldn’t have come over here if it weren’t for you.” I glanced back at Pierre and saw that he was watching me. He met my gaze and quickly dropped his eyes to the table.
“Told you.” She whispered.
I got back to Cam and Kellan’s pretty late, but Kellan was still up. I dropped next to him on the futon and he draped an arm around my shoulders, pulling me close.
“Did you have fun?” He asked softly. I nodded.
“It was alright.” I thought back to Pierre and sighed. Kellan turned halfway to look at me.
“What’s going on in that pretty little head of yours?” He asked.
“I miss Jackson.” I said. I miss the easiness of being with him, the feeling of being protected. I didn’t have to worry about how I acted, or how I looked.
“I know you do, lady.” I bit my lip. “Talk to me.” He encouraged.
“I’m so mad at him. Why would he do this to me?” I said, pounding my fist on my thigh. Kellan caught my hand.
“Just keep in mind that it’s killing him as much as it is you.” He said softly.
“Good.” I muttered, my voice breaking. Kellan pulled me back to his side, resting his mouth on the top of my head. “Kellan?”
“Yeah?”
“Can I get your honest opinion?”
“Of course.”
“Do you think I should give up on Jackson? That I should move on?” I felt him hesitate.
“No. I don’t. And I don’t think you could if you tried.” He said. I sighed.
“You’re probably right.”
“Get some rest, Mags.” I closed my eyes and fell asleep easily.
It was really difficult for me to distract myself while I was alone, when both Kellan and Cam were out actually having a life. Thankfully, I was saved by Mollie. Her father was now living in LA, so she was in town. She called me to see where I was and two days later, I was hanging out with Mollie and Taylor at Starbucks. I had been trying to call Ashley since I arrived at Kellan’s front door, but her phone just went straight to voicemail. I had left her so many messages that I had filled up her inbox.
“So, have you been able to get a hold of Jackson?” Mollie asked. I shook my head.
“No-he still won’t answer.” I sighed. The door opened and I glanced up to see Pierre with three guys I recognized as Billie Joe, Tre and Mike from Green Day. Mollie gripped my wrist as she spotted them, too. Pierre saw me and grinned. He headed my way, waving Billie, Tre and Mike towards the line. Mollie and Taylor shot me a look but remained silent.
“Hey, Maggie.” Pierre greeted. I smiled up at him.
“How are you?”
“Better now.” He said casually, but I caught the meaning.
“This is Mollie Heiser and Taylor Lautner.” I introduced. “This is Pierre Bouvier.” He smiled at them as his three companions joined his side.
“And this is Billie Joe Armstrong, Tre Cool and Mike Dirnt.” He gestured. I glanced at Mollie, who’s face was slowly turned from pale to bright red.
“Hi.” I smiled at them. Tre’s eyes were on Mollie and he was grinning. Mike caught the look and nudged Tre’s arm. I smiled to myself and met Pierre’s gaze which was on me.