So Long and Goodnight...

You had finished your cigarette and were now just sitting perched on the railing of the Ways’ front porch, avoiding going back inside. You didn’t want to hear him talking to her anymore. You didn’t think you could take it.

So you sat there, trying to think of anything but the only thing you could ever think about: Gerard.

It was May. School would be out soon. That would’ve made you excited as hell considering all the epic adventures you and your friends had planned for the summer break; concerts, water parks, camping trips, sleepless nights, bonfires, ghost stories, the beach, exploring the creepy ass woods behind Franks house, going Extreme Rickshawing* down the giant hill at Rays’…the possibilities were truly endless.

Or they would have been had not Gerard had a massive aneurysm and decided to ruin everyone’s fucking lives (not to mention his own). You knew that you could just kiss all your fun goodbye because Alexa would steal Gerard away from his friends like she had done before and change him into a totally different person and he wouldn’t be the fun-loving care-free Gerard that you were so in love with. He would be Alexas’ bitch. The thought made you physically sick to your stomach.

“Hey, you okay,” came a voice from the doorway.

You turned to see Bob stepping outside with a cigarette and closing the door behind him. He lit up and walked over to where you perched.

You shrugged in response to his question.

“I don’t know. Kinda wanna rip that fucking bitchs’ head off but other than that…” You let him draw his own conclusions.

Bob sighed.

“Helena, what he did to you was really fucking shitty and me and the guys are about two fucking seconds away from letting him know what the fuck he’s been missing for the past few years.”

“How …?” You questioned, stunned.

“Oh please.” He said mater-of-factly. “I’ve known since I was like twelve.”

You glared at him and found that if he was exaggerating at all on the time line, it wasn’t by that fucking much.

“FUCK MY LIFE!” You yelled, making Bob laugh a little as he released the smoke he had just inhaled.

“You should just let us fucking tell him what a fucking moron he is, Lane. We could do it presentation style. I’ll make a poster bored, maybe Frank can whip up a slide show, Ray can choreograph a dance number, and if all else fails, Mikey can just beat the Hell out of him.” He inhaled deeply and gazed up at you with a very amused look on his face.

You couldn’t help but smile. Bob was brilliant when it came to making people laugh but looking at him, you could tell he was only half joking.

“Bobert, you’re crazy,” You mumbled.

“Does that mean “go for it, Bob Bryar, you sexy bitch”?” he asked with a crooked smile.

You shook your head as you let a tiny laugh escape your throat.

“No Bob. It’ll just create a big fucking mess.”

“Uhh. I’m sorry. Are you in the same hemisphere as me? This is already a huge mess. It can only get better from here.”

If only he’d known how terrifyingly wrong those words were.

“Bob …just …” You looked him in the eye seriously. “…just don’t, okay? I really do appreciate the gesture and I love you to death for suggesting it but …I couldn’t make him choose.”

Bob caught the hidden message.

“You mean you actually think that he would pick that fucking disease ridden whore over you?”

At this, you glanced nervously toward the door, convinced he could hear every word. A part of you really wanted to take Bob up on his offer …(minus the poster bored, the power point, the beating, and the dance routine …just sitting down and talking would suffice) …but a bigger part of you was terrified of the outcome.

“Well I just …” Another nervous glance at the door “…don’t wanna find out,” you finished, meeting Bobs eyes.

You held his gaze for a few seconds, sighed, and jumped down from your railing perch …and waited.

Bob smiled, extinguished his cigarette, flicked it away, and stepped in front of you, opening the door and sticking his head in. Gerard had just finished his conversation and was closing his phone.

“Clear,” Bob whispered over his shoulder, and you both went inside.

The rest of the day passed somewhat un-eventfully (save for Don and Donna walking through the door all smiles and looking ten years younger and oh so in love some time around 1:30) but much more tensely than ever before. There wasn’t much room for “having fun” since everyone but you was mad at Gerard and Gerard was mad at everyone but you. They felt guilty for not being their usual hyperactive, adventurous, fun-filled selves though because they all knew what you had to go home to and a large part of each of them was afraid that they may never see you alive again …but no one dared mention the looming possibility.

Near dark, when he could draw it out no longer, Don piled everyone into his car and prepared to take you all home. Your house was closest. It was a quiet ride for no one knew what to say to you. They knew this night could very well be Hell on Earth for you but they had no clue what to do to stop it. Don drove slow, dreading the fact that he was powerless to help you in any way.

Pulling into your driveway, he found that it was a bit more cramped than usual. Only when he made a comment of that nature that you hadn’t quite caught, did you look around and notice that the very same blue truck you had watched go by the Ways’ house was now parked in your driveway.

“Oh my fucking god,” You whispered trying not to burst into tears on the spot.

You practically shoved Mikey and Bob out of the car as they were the ones blocking your exit. Your bag slung over your shoulder, you glanced up at the front door just in time to see a very familiar face pop out and look in your direction. You shrieked happily as you jumped up and down near your group of shocked and confused friends.

Ten thousand forgotten memories came rushing back to you as you heard a deep, yet jolly laugh emanate from the front door but get closer as the man ran outside to greet you. You dropped your things to the ground and ran to him as well, jumping into his open arms and wrapping your arms tightly around his thick neck as he spun you around and set you gently back on the ground.

“Uncle Charlie!” You exclaimed excitedly when you could finally speak. “Oh my god! What are you doing here?”

“Well,” He said with a smile, “I was thinking I haven’t taken a vacation in a long time and the boys can run the ranch just fine without me so why not just pack a few things and go spend a week with my favorite niece?”

You squealed and hugged him again, indescribably happy that he was here. You dragged him over to your group of friends and excitedly introduced him as “the single most greatest and amazingly brilliant uncle in the whole entire fucking world”.

“Is that hyphenated?” Mikey asked thoughtfully.

“You must be Mikey,” Uncle Charlie said with a laugh.

“Yeah,” Mikey said, amazed that he knew his name like that.

Charlie went down the line and correctly named every one of your friends with absolutely no coaching from you.

“Aww! You talk about us,” Bob said to you, shocked but clearly flattered that he was good enough to be mentioned in detail to “the worlds greatest uncle”.

“Only …a lot,” You confessed, smiling.

“Hell, you kiddin’ me?” Charlie chukled “I could probably write a separate book on every single one of you.”

“And he’s soooo not kidding,” You admitted as you all shared a laugh.

You stood together with your friends and Uncle, talking and joking a bit more (the Alexa problem momentarily forgotten and the tension lifted if only for a while) until Don happened to glance down at his watch.

“Oh shit,” He said mostly to Ray, Bob, and Frank. “I’ve gotta get you kids home. Your moms’ are probably wondering where the Hell you are.”

“Oh God,” Ray said with a forced laugh. “Heaven forbid my mother ever wonder where I am. Last time that happened, she put the entire Vatican City on alert.

At that very moment, some old guy that had been out for a walk, came into your view on his way down the sidewalk.

“Well look at that,” Said your uncle with mock amazement. “That must be the pope himself.”

You could’ve literally ruptured your spleen with how hard you all started laughing.

You started hugging and saying goodbye to all your friends, purposefully saving Gerard for last. You got to him and put your arms around his neck, letting the hug last a bit longer than usual. He didn’t seem to mind and hugged you back until you finally, reluctantly pulled away from him.

“Uh so,” Gerard gestured to your uncle. “Should we expect to see you in school tomorrow?”

“Well,” Charlie answered for you. “I was thinking, if she wanted to of course, she could take a few days off and hang out with her old Uncle Charlie. But it’s totally up to you, my dear,” he said patting you on the head.

“Sounds great, Uncle Charlie,” You beamed. “You guys don’t mind, do you?” You asked your friends.

“No way,” Bob said. “Hang out. Have fun. Go crazy.”

The others smiled and nodded their agreement.

“Thanks guys,” You said, going in for one more round of hugs.

Maybe it was just your imagination or your over-active mind making up horror stories again, but you had the very odd but poignant feeling that this was the last time you would ever see the guys or Don or Donna or your other friends (Brooke, Raven, Autumn, and their parents) for that matter.

You tried to shake it off but as you picked your bag up off the ground and watched your friends pile back into the car, you almost couldn’t resist the urge to call them all back to you and never let them leave your side ever again. They were everything to you and you were suddenly stricken by the terrifying, immobilizing thought of ever being without them. You almost cried out to them but you held yourself in check …almost.

They were all in the car and Don had started the engine. The sweet spring air blew down through the trees, ruffling Gerards’ jet black hair through the open car door window on which he now rested his arm.

“Gerard,” You said against your own will as some hidden force made you step forward and place your pale hand on his equally pale arm.

He turned his gaze to you and you were frozen in place by his absolutely gorgeous hazel eyes. You couldn’t look away.

Searching hard for your voice you came up with something to say because you didn’t have the guts to say what you really wanted him to hear.

‘TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, YOU FUCKING MORON!’ The voice in your head kept screaming at you.

Instead you said: “Thanks …for everything …I mean the concert and…” ‘MAKING ME LOVE YOU!’ “Just …everything.”

His smile turned your very soul to mush in an instant.

“It was no problem, Lana,” He said warmly. “I’m really glad you enjoyed it.”

One last hug.

It took every single ounce of strength you had in you to pry yourself away this time and when you finally did manage to let your arms slide away from his neck, it felt as if he had completely drained your very will to live.

You waved goodbye as the car backed out of the drive and somehow resisted the overwhelming urge to curl up in a ball and cry yourself to death as you watched the red taillights (not unlike the red eyes of a demon from Hell sent to collect your soul) fade into the darkness.