Wasted

Bobby and I stood on the porch, not saying anything. I didn’t know what to say. I probably should have come up with some sort of plan other than just showing up on his door step. “So, Bobby…” I started. “It’s been a while.” Bobby nodded.

“What are you doin’ here, McKenly?” he asked.

I sighed. “I needed to get away. I couldn’t deal with…the hunting anymore. I’m tired.” I lied. He didn’t need to know what was really going on. I knew that he couldn’t play the role of the awkward-fill-in-dad.

“Well, last time I saw you four wasn’t exactly a happy occasion.” Bobby admitted. I knew it. I knew he wouldn’t let me stay. Of course, something in me, told me to be more optimistic about it.

I nodded at him. “I know, but it’s only me. I thought that you and I had gotten along. We sorta understood each other. And it probably won’t even be that long. A couple weeks at the most.” He stared with an eyebrow raised. “If you take me in.” I added. He sighed. I figured he didn’t know what to do. “I can cook.” I added with a smile. Bobby shook his head with a one-sided smile on his own face.

“Where are the boys? Do they know where you are?”

I groaned. It seemed that everyone was trying to look out for me. I didn’t need it. Granted, running away to someone who would take me in probably wouldn’t show anyone my own strength. I would never want to be alone, knowing what I know. I shrugged my shoulders. “I don’t know where they are. Sam knows where I am. Dean freaked out when he realized I was gone. I begged Sam not to tell him, even if things got violent.”

“And John?”

He didn’t know. I hated breaking the news. I knew what everyone thought when a hunter goes missing. “We don’t know where he is. He left us on a lead about three to four weeks ago. We haven’t heard from him since.”

“He alright?”

I shrugged. “I’m sure, though. John can take care of himself. He needs a break from us. Deserves it. He’s been raising us for far too long.” I looked down, shrugging my backpack over my shoulder, preventing it from sliding off. I heard the door squeak as it moved.

Bobby sighed. “Alright, you can stay. But you, Blondie, you’re grillin’ tonight.” I looked up and smiled big, moving to put an arm around him.

“Bobby, you’re the best. Thank you, thank you, thank you!” I said really fast, pulling away and kissing his cheek. “Okay, so I’m going upstairs! I’ll change, and go out to the store right now.” I went passed him through the door he had opened. I hurried up the stairs taking two at a time.

“Take the room on the left!” Bobby shouted up to me. I went into the room and set my bag down on the bed. I rifled through it, searching for clothes that I quickly changed into. When I moved my bag to the floor, my phone fell out of the front pocket. Staring at it for a second, I reminded myself that I hadn’t listened to Dean’s second message yet. I didn’t want to, though. I knew I should, just to get it over with. But instead I decided to call Sam. I was sure that he’d want to know I was okay. The phone rang.

“Hello?” the other line answered.

“Hey, Sam.” There was a pause. He hesitated. “Sam?”

“Yeah, sorry.” He said, slowly. “We’re just a little busy here.”

“Who’s that?” I heard Dean next to Sam. He had food in his mouth which was definitely not out of the ordinary.

“He’s there, huh?” I asked.

“Yeah.” Sam said, defeated.

“Is that her?” There was no response to Dean’s question. “Sam, is that McKenly?”

“I should have rethought this.” I shook my head. I can’t believe I was that stupid. I remember to not talk on the phone when I answer it, in case it’s Dean, but I can’t wait until a time where I thought he might not be around to call myself. I groaned.

“Give me the phone, Sam.” Dean was angry. My heart started to pound itself in my chest. I couldn’t bear to talk to him.

“No!” Sam fought.

“Sam, give me the damn phone!”

I couldn’t breathe, listening to the phone rustle around on the other end. They were probably fighting over the phone and it was too much for me, but I couldn’t hang up without telling why I called. “Sam, listen!” I started, making sure I was a little loud, just in case he hadn’t had the phone to his ear. “I’m here and safe. I’m stayin’ here for a while.” The next thing I said came out of my mouth before I could stop it. “Tell Dean that I’ll call him later.”

“McKenly?” I lost my breath. It wasn’t Sam with the phone anymore. It was Dean. “Ken, c’mon.” he begged. “What are you doing?” I didn’t answer. “Where are you?” Silence. “Ken, please, just come back.” As soon as I heard it, I took the phone away from my ear and pressed end. I didn’t want to listen to him pleading. I made a big mistake by calling.

I took a deep breath and made my way down stairs. Bobby was on one of his fake department phones. He held up a finger. Instead of just standing there, waiting, I decided to look around the kitchen to see what I’d need. I made a mental list as I laughed quietly as I heard Bobby yell at the person on the other end of the line for being so stupid.

“Idjit.” Bobby said, slamming the phone back on the hook. He slammed it too hard, though, and it bounced up and landed on the floor. “Balls.” He reached down for it. He stood back up and handed me a key chain. “Take the truck. Just don’t crash it.”

“Yes, sir.” I said, as I had been taught to be polite. “Steaks or burgers.” I asked him. He thought.

“Get a couple steaks. We’ll celebrate.” He smiled at me. “Believe it or not, kid, I missed ya.” He admitted holding his beer bottle up towards me. I shook my head.

“Me, too.” I smiled. “Alright, I’ll be back.” I jogged outta the house. Rumsfeld lifted his head like had had to me earlier. I crouched down in front of him and scratched one of his ears. He panted happily.

Just in that moment, I wished I could stay with Bobby forever. If only to have a pet like the dog. You never realize how much you want a pet until you can’t have one. I smiled at the dog. “You wanna go for a ride?” I asked him. He barked a response and pushed himself off the ground. “I guess that’s a yes.” I pushed myself up and walked with him to the truck. When I opened the door, he jumped up and I followed after him to roll down the passenger side window half way. Turning on the old truck, I left the music off, rolling my window down to enjoy the ride. I looked to Rumsfeld and saw how happy he looked. Then I looked at myself. Granted my head wasn’t out the window, but I saw myself almost as happy as him. I’ve never really had this sort of freedom to go to the store to prepare a real dinner. I felt safe somehow. It felt good to partially ignore what I knew was out there even though I still had my gun in one boot and a silver knife in the other. I couldn’t help but feel like there was one thing missing.

~~~~~

*3rd Person POV*

Dean had thrown the phone back at his brother when McKenly hung up. Why wouldn’t she just listen to him? He had practically begged her to come back. Of course, she just hung up and didn’t bother explaining herself. He was mad. He was upset.

Sam left Dean alone at the counter to use the restroom after they’d finished eating. He circled an obituary in the newspaper he had been reading.

“Can I get you anything else?” Dean looked up to see that a waitress had just asked him a question. Instantly, he forgot all his worried about McKenly. He smiled with the pen in his mouth, that he’d been chewing. Sam came over just in time.

“Just the check please.” Sam said.

“Okay.” the waitress said, still looking at Dean. She walked away, flirtatiously. Dean dropped his head, defeated. He turned to his brother.

“You know, Sam, we are allowed to have fun once in a while.” Dean pointed to the waitress. “That’s fun.”

Sam rolled his eyes. “Yeah, just after you had yelled at me for not telling you where McKenly is? You care about her so much to have her here, but you’re willing to get laid by someone else.” Dean turned away grumbling.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Bull, Dean. There is no way you and McKenly are just best friends the way you two act around each other.”

“We don’t ‘act’ like anything.”

“You do. And you hurt her when you push her away. That’s one reason why she left.”

“You’d rather I had sex with her and then act like it never happened?” Dean interrogated, getting really angry at this point.

“No, that’s not what I said.”

“Whatever.” Dean said, dismissively. He showed Sam the newspaper obituary he had just circled.

“Here, take a look at this, I think I got one. It’s in Lake Manitoc, Wisconsin. Last week eighteen year old Sophie Carlton walks into the lake and doesn’t walk out. Water’s dragged, nothing found. Third drowning there this year. No bodies have been found. Sophie’s funeral was two days ago.”

“A funeral?”

“Yeah, it’s weird. They buried an empty coffin. For, uh, closure or something.”

“Closure? What closure? People don’t just disappear, Dean. Other people just stop looking for them.” Sam said, condescendingly.

“Something you wanna say to me?”

“The trail for Dad is getting colder and colder every day.”

“I know that. So what are we supposed to do?”

“I don’t know. Something. Anything.”

“You know what? I’m sick of this attitude. You won’t tell me where McKenly is. It’s like your hiding something from me. And now you don’t think I wanna find Dad as much as you do?” Dean questioned.

“Yeah, I know you do. It’s just –”

“Ken and I have been with him every single day for the past two years, while you’ve been off to college going to pep rallies. I’m sure Ken would have loved to go to college. We will find Dad. We’ll get Ken back, and we’ll look for him. Until then, we’re gonna kill everything bad between here and there. Okay?” Dean ordered.

Sam rolled his eyes at his brother. The waitress walked by again, grabbing Dean’s attention. Sam hit his brother on the arm. “Lake Manitoc.” He said. Dean scrambled his brain back to his brother.

“Huh?”

“How far?”

~~~~~

*McKenly’s POV*

When I got to the store I had ordered Rumsfeld to stay in the truck. He simply laid himself down on the seat like he was lying back at the house. I shook my head at the lazy dog. I walked into the store, not really recognizing anyone. Not that I was surprised or thought that I would. We didn’t stay here long enough for me to make friends. Quickly, I scanned through the meat department and picked out a few steaks. I also got a few other things that I thought would be necessary for my stay. His kitchen was pretty empty of any foods that didn’t involve grease. Weird, I know, but sometimes I preferred an apple over bacon. As I was nearing fruits and vegetables, I decided I would also make some mashed potatoes for tonight. As I grabbed a small bag for my cart, I felt a small tug on my leg, which frightened me. I looked down, thinking that my gun was beginning to fall out. Instead I found a little boy. He couldn’t have been much older than five with white blonde hair and the cutest blue eyes for a little boy. He had one of his thumbs in his mouth and his face was blotchy with tears.

“Hi, there.” I said, sweetly. He let go of my pant leg, and I crouched down to his level. “Are you okay, sweetie?” he sniffled hard and shook his head, his thumb never leaving his mouth. “Where’s your mommy or daddy?” he shrugged his shoulders. I smiled at him, a little heart-broken. I always hated it when I got lost in the grocery store. It was a big place, with too many tall aisles that would scare a little kid. Especially one that couldn’t find his parents. “I’ll tell you what. If you take my hand, maybe stop those cute tears,” I said, wiping at one of the water droplets that were falling from his eye, “I’ll help you find them.” the little boy nodded his head. I stood up and grabbed his hand, leaving my cart in the fruits and veggies section.

We walked passed a few aisles before I heard a man yelling. “Jacob!” I stopped when the boy turned his head down the aisle. A man came jogging down the aisle with a box of cereal in his arm. The boy’s hand fell from my grasp and he ran into this man’s arms. “Oh, thank God!” the man said, “I’m so sorry, Jake.” He kissed the side of the boy’s head. I smiled at the two of them. The man looked to me. I couldn’t help but notice how attractive he looked. I was never really attracted to guys with long hair, but I found that it worked for this man. It was blonde and almost long enough to be put into a ponytail. His jaw line was prominent, which I always found attractive. It was his piercing blue eyes that hit me the most. I knew where the boy had gotten those adorable blue eyes from. His eyes were a blue that was almost grey, they was so bright. He was very muscular and the boy in his arms looked so small compared to the man’s wide shoulders.

He walked towards me with his kid in his arms. I couldn’t help but notice that my heart was beating loudly in my chest. I mentally told my heart to calm down, but it wouldn’t listen. “Thank you, so much.” He said.

I didn’t know what to say. I was entranced. After a moment, of incredible awkwardness thanks to my stupid self, I mumbled. “Oh, it’s no problem. He’s a sweetie.”

“He just gets away from me. I turn my back and he’s gone.” He smiled.

I laughed. “Yeah, kids will do that.”

“You have kids?” he questioned.

My eyes widened and I shook my head. “No, no, not me. I practically raised my little brother, Sam, though.” I smiled to the little boy. He blushed, smiled and buried his face into his dad’s chest. That made me smile more.

“He’s a little flirt, this one. Gets it from his mother.”

My heart dropped. I don’t know why I would let my hopes get up in the first place. He has a kid. Of course, there’s gonna be a woman in his life, too. “Ah, I see. Dad’s doin’ all the shoppin’ while Mom does the real work, huh?”

The man smiled. “No, actually, we, uh, we lost my wife. About two years ago.”

I cursed under my breath. “Damn,” I said, quiet enough for the boy not to hear. “I am so sorry. I shouldn’t have –”

The man shook his head. “It’s alright. You couldn’t have known. I haven’t seen you around here.”

“Yeah, I just got into town. I’m staying with my uncle for a while. Just to get away from the real world.”

“Wouldn’t I love that.” he said. “I couldn’t leave this one, though.” I found that sweet. I almost remember a flash of my own father nurturing me like this one. “Your uncle is…?” he trailed off, leaving me to answer.

“Bobby. Bobby Singer. He’s got the salvage yard on the outside of town.”

The man shuffled warily. “Isn’t he the town drunk?”

I laughed. “Maybe.” I admitted. “To me, he’s just Bobby though. He likes to keep to himself.” I looked back at where I left my cart. “Oh, I just remembered, I’ve got a dog in the truck. I should probably get going. It was nice meeting you though.” I turned back in the direction on my cart.

“Meeting?” the man stopped me with a hold on my arm. “How can we have met when I don’t even know your name?”

I blushed, feeling the heat of his hand on my arm. “Right.” I said, slowly, trying to calm my heart, still. He removed his hand when I held out my right hand for him to shake. “I’m McKenly Eden.”

The man smiled and took my hand, shaking it. “You already met Jake. And I’m Jason Fisher.”

We held our hands together for a little too long before I pulled away. “It was nice meeting you Jason Fisher.” I said.

“You as well, Ms. Eden.” He responded. I slowly turned back to my cart and hurried to finish my shopping. I kept glancing around my shoulder to see if I could catch another glimpse of him. I didn’t. I checked out at the register, using a credit card under my own name. It was almost weird signing for a receipt for my real name. I got out to the truck and put the bags in the back of it. When I climbed in, I noticed a piece of paper stuck between the windshield wiper and the window itself. I climbed out of the truck and went around to get it. It was a receipt for a single box of cereal. Instantly, I knew who had put it there. There was a phone number on it, as well as a note.

“Jacob would really like to see you again. I sure would, as well. Until then, Jason Fisher.”

I felt like I was in middle school with a note that was stuffed in my locker from a cute boy. I smiled and looked around the parking lot. It was nearly empty. As I climbed back in the truck, I just stared at the note. Rumsfeld whined and I looked to him. He had been staring at me.

“What?” I asked him. He turned his head to the side. “My mission here is to forget about my feelings for Dean. If that means going out with another guy, I might just do it.” Rumsfeld whined again and laid back on the seat. “Besides, you didn’t see how handsome he was.”