What Kind of Wonderland is This?
Learning to breathe
b]Thump thump
……..
Thump thump[b/]
….what….is that….
Thump thump
….that noise...........it sounds….like a heart…..
Thump thump
…my heart? But why…
Thump thump
I need…
Who’s ……who’s talking?
Thump thump
I need to breathe.
My throat….feels tight.
Thump thump
Need to breathe.
What? I… I don’t understand….
Thump thump
Breathe.
Breathe? What…what do I…wait. What’s on my mouth?
Thump thumpthump
Air.
I can’t get air. My mouth is covered….but my nose. My nose is…covered too?
Thump Thumpthump
I need air.
I need air….I need air! My lungs are burning! I have to get it off my mouth! Why can’t I move my arms?
THUMP THUMPTHUMP
Need Air.
I need air! Move arms move! I’m seeing lights…oh no. no no no!
THUMP THUMPTHUMP
NEED AIR.
I’m dying! I can’t breathe! I need air!
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
“Oh shit.”
“What is happening?”
“She’s struggling too hard and so losing oxygen. She’s dying.”
~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~**~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~
Air! Where’s the air? This isn’t air…its’…it’s I don’t know what! What is this stuff? I need air!
Now!
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
“What did you say?”
“Did I stutter rat?”
“Well, don’t let her! We need her still! …don’t call me rat.”
“As if I don’t know that. And try it. Rat.”
“Why you! I’ll….hey, hey, stop it!”
“Put Doris down March and stop bickering. Just loosen her so she can breathe.”
“Yes director.”
“Yes director sir.”
“…rat.”
~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
I felt something slide off of my mouth and then I could breathe.
Air!
Instantly I took a deep breath. Air flooded my burning lungs. It was like I had just come up from a deep dive and finally broken the surface. I gulped at the air, sucked it in like it was life itself….which technically, it was. That’s beside the point though. I could breathe again. I almost cried I was so, so grateful. I was alive and I will still be alive. At least…for a while.
I still couldn’t see but that didn’t really register as something that mattered, at least at that moment. My crisis was over. Naturally my attention was quickly shifted over to my throat. It was itchy and burning. It felt like it was jerking seizing up. Oh god. I’m going to….
Suddenly everything that entered my stomach was hurled out my mouth.
…throw up. I felt the sludge I swallowed during my desperate air-retrieving attempt sit in my throat. I gagged again and I tried to spit it out but I threw up again. My throat felt like it was rubbed with sandpaper.
Luckily I could just cough up the rest. My throat burned as I coughed up all of the gunk I swallowed during my desperate attempt at air. It was thick, like a mix of forty wads of chewed gum and gravy mixed together. Beautiful picture I know. Trust me the taste was worse. Bile plus dirty mud plus whatever Dinah dragged in. Delicious. I kept spitting to try and get the sludge and its resulting taste out of my mouth. It took awhile but finally sludge was gone from my throat. Sadly, I could still feel its strings hanging from the corners of my mouth.
Awesome.
Well, at least the tightness in my chest is gone. Not having sight is annoying but I can deal with it for a little bit longer. My heartbeat is back to normalish. Something keeps whacking my face but I ignored it for now. My throat hurts still but it’s a dull pain compared to my lungs before. I was breathing at a normal pace again as well. I sighed with relief. My muscles relaxed a bit and my arms lessened. My body was still tense when I trying to make my arms move and tear the goo off. Where the hell that goo come from anyway? Something about a reflection in a mirror…
Mirror.
It all came back. The funhouse, Collin scaring me and me falling through into the room with the mirror, my reflection laughing as she twisted to tar and pulling me, pulling me, pulling me into the…the…
Mirror.
Oh my god. Oh my god!
I was kidnapped by a mirror….a mirror!
I started to giggle. The mere absurdity of it all just caused me to laugh. My throat flared up from the pain but I didn’t care. I couldn’t stop laughing. I was taken by a mirror? My reflection turned to tar and kidnapped me.
I must be going insane.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~**~*~*~*~*~
“What the…”
“What is it now?”
“She’s….laughing.”
“Laughing?”
“I thought you were a rat not a parrot.”
“You stay out of this Cyles! And don’t call me rat!”
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*
My laughter tapered off and when I stopped laughing I realized I was crying. I tried to wipe my eyes but I couldn’t.
Oh yeah, my arms are stuck.
I started to cry harder.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~**~*~*~*~*~
“What a mad girl……I like her”
“Me too!”
“Don’t get attached.”
“Yes director.”
“Yes director.”
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*
My crying finally tapered off too, though it took longer than the laughing. I hadn’t cried like that since Grandma died. I sniffed and tried to wipe my nose. Oh yeah, arms again. Well that’s annoying. I started wriggling my arms and I realized that my right arm was loose. Yes, perfect! I twisted and contorted my shoulder blade as I tried to wrestle myself free.
After nearly twisted off my shoulder I finally pried myself out. Well, my arm out. One of them.
You get it already.
I wiped my nose. Much better.
I felt myself get whapped again and growled. Okay, enough’s enough. I grabbed for it and felt my scalp pull.
It was my hair. The thing that was whapping my face was my hair. It was flowing in the wind so it kept hitting me. Wait, wind? There’s wind? I felt my gut drop as I realized something else.
It was flowing up.
I can’t feel the ground…I can’t feel the ground! I clawed at my eye mask and freed one eye.
I wish I didn’t.
Have you ever had one of those dreams where you were falling and you were so afraid to hit the ground? You screamed and screamed trying to force yourself awake to stop the falling. You just had that horrible feeling that if, or when, you hit the bottom you would die. The feeling that you wouldn’t wake up if you hit the bottom choking you as you fall fills you up completely and you scream. That dream?
I wish that was happening to me.
I was falling down and I was already awake.
……..
Thump thump[b/]
….what….is that….
Thump thump
….that noise...........it sounds….like a heart…..
Thump thump
…my heart? But why…
Thump thump
I need…
Who’s ……who’s talking?
Thump thump
I need to breathe.
My throat….feels tight.
Thump thump
Need to breathe.
What? I… I don’t understand….
Thump thump
Breathe.
Breathe? What…what do I…wait. What’s on my mouth?
Thump thumpthump
Air.
I can’t get air. My mouth is covered….but my nose. My nose is…covered too?
Thump Thumpthump
I need air.
I need air….I need air! My lungs are burning! I have to get it off my mouth! Why can’t I move my arms?
THUMP THUMPTHUMP
Need Air.
I need air! Move arms move! I’m seeing lights…oh no. no no no!
THUMP THUMPTHUMP
NEED AIR.
I’m dying! I can’t breathe! I need air!
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
“Oh shit.”
“What is happening?”
“She’s struggling too hard and so losing oxygen. She’s dying.”
~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~**~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~
Air! Where’s the air? This isn’t air…its’…it’s I don’t know what! What is this stuff? I need air!
Now!
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
“What did you say?”
“Did I stutter rat?”
“Well, don’t let her! We need her still! …don’t call me rat.”
“As if I don’t know that. And try it. Rat.”
“Why you! I’ll….hey, hey, stop it!”
“Put Doris down March and stop bickering. Just loosen her so she can breathe.”
“Yes director.”
“Yes director sir.”
“…rat.”
~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
I felt something slide off of my mouth and then I could breathe.
Air!
Instantly I took a deep breath. Air flooded my burning lungs. It was like I had just come up from a deep dive and finally broken the surface. I gulped at the air, sucked it in like it was life itself….which technically, it was. That’s beside the point though. I could breathe again. I almost cried I was so, so grateful. I was alive and I will still be alive. At least…for a while.
I still couldn’t see but that didn’t really register as something that mattered, at least at that moment. My crisis was over. Naturally my attention was quickly shifted over to my throat. It was itchy and burning. It felt like it was jerking seizing up. Oh god. I’m going to….
Suddenly everything that entered my stomach was hurled out my mouth.
…throw up. I felt the sludge I swallowed during my desperate air-retrieving attempt sit in my throat. I gagged again and I tried to spit it out but I threw up again. My throat felt like it was rubbed with sandpaper.
Luckily I could just cough up the rest. My throat burned as I coughed up all of the gunk I swallowed during my desperate attempt at air. It was thick, like a mix of forty wads of chewed gum and gravy mixed together. Beautiful picture I know. Trust me the taste was worse. Bile plus dirty mud plus whatever Dinah dragged in. Delicious. I kept spitting to try and get the sludge and its resulting taste out of my mouth. It took awhile but finally sludge was gone from my throat. Sadly, I could still feel its strings hanging from the corners of my mouth.
Awesome.
Well, at least the tightness in my chest is gone. Not having sight is annoying but I can deal with it for a little bit longer. My heartbeat is back to normalish. Something keeps whacking my face but I ignored it for now. My throat hurts still but it’s a dull pain compared to my lungs before. I was breathing at a normal pace again as well. I sighed with relief. My muscles relaxed a bit and my arms lessened. My body was still tense when I trying to make my arms move and tear the goo off. Where the hell that goo come from anyway? Something about a reflection in a mirror…
Mirror.
It all came back. The funhouse, Collin scaring me and me falling through into the room with the mirror, my reflection laughing as she twisted to tar and pulling me, pulling me, pulling me into the…the…
Mirror.
Oh my god. Oh my god!
I was kidnapped by a mirror….a mirror!
I started to giggle. The mere absurdity of it all just caused me to laugh. My throat flared up from the pain but I didn’t care. I couldn’t stop laughing. I was taken by a mirror? My reflection turned to tar and kidnapped me.
I must be going insane.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~**~*~*~*~*~
“What the…”
“What is it now?”
“She’s….laughing.”
“Laughing?”
“I thought you were a rat not a parrot.”
“You stay out of this Cyles! And don’t call me rat!”
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*
My laughter tapered off and when I stopped laughing I realized I was crying. I tried to wipe my eyes but I couldn’t.
Oh yeah, my arms are stuck.
I started to cry harder.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~**~*~*~*~*~
“What a mad girl……I like her”
“Me too!”
“Don’t get attached.”
“Yes director.”
“Yes director.”
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*
My crying finally tapered off too, though it took longer than the laughing. I hadn’t cried like that since Grandma died. I sniffed and tried to wipe my nose. Oh yeah, arms again. Well that’s annoying. I started wriggling my arms and I realized that my right arm was loose. Yes, perfect! I twisted and contorted my shoulder blade as I tried to wrestle myself free.
After nearly twisted off my shoulder I finally pried myself out. Well, my arm out. One of them.
You get it already.
I wiped my nose. Much better.
I felt myself get whapped again and growled. Okay, enough’s enough. I grabbed for it and felt my scalp pull.
It was my hair. The thing that was whapping my face was my hair. It was flowing in the wind so it kept hitting me. Wait, wind? There’s wind? I felt my gut drop as I realized something else.
It was flowing up.
I can’t feel the ground…I can’t feel the ground! I clawed at my eye mask and freed one eye.
I wish I didn’t.
Have you ever had one of those dreams where you were falling and you were so afraid to hit the ground? You screamed and screamed trying to force yourself awake to stop the falling. You just had that horrible feeling that if, or when, you hit the bottom you would die. The feeling that you wouldn’t wake up if you hit the bottom choking you as you fall fills you up completely and you scream. That dream?
I wish that was happening to me.
I was falling down and I was already awake.