The Past That Blinds (1 of 3)

“Gandalf. I can’t do this” I say to the wizard who is waiting for the hobbit to wake.
“And what makes you say that?” He asks
“It’s just… Have you seen the way he looks at me… Or… Or heard how little he thinks of me. I didn’t agree to come on this quest to be… Belittled! For something-” I say pacing backwards and forwards.
“Calm yourself Chase.”
I take a deep breath and sit down.
“Gandalf, If I wanted this kind of treatment I would’ve stayed roaming towns and drinking in taverns. Wandering… Alone… ” I rest my head in my hands “But I came…” I look up again “I wanted to help… I wanted to find my place... Where I belong.” I stand up “But it appears this isn’t it.” I speak a lot calmer and head for the doorway.
“Since when did you give up so easily?” Gandalf asks seriously. I stand quietly thinking to myself. “Since when did you listen to what anybody thought of you?” He stands up and walks over to me
I look at Gandalf with a serious expression on my face.
“I don’t… But he’s not just anybody.” I say then walk out of the room turning around the corner almost bumping into the dwarf prince himself stopping us both in our tracks. We both look at each other silently for a short time before I continue walking to find an empty part of the house. All the rooms in the house seem to have a dwarf or two in them so I go to the front door and just lean my arm on the door and rest my head on my arm and as I look at the door handle I contemplate leaving. But shortly after the thought I decide against it because of another thought I get. ‘Gandalf is right, since when do I give up, or listen to what anyone thinks of me, no matter who they are.’ I push off the door and go to find ink and quill to sign the contract. On the way I bump into the hobbit.
"Bilbo, how are you feeling?" I ask
"I'm not going on this quest if that's what you mean" He says calmly
"I don't mean that" I state
"Well I'm fine, thank you"
"Mr Baggins, if it's because you're worried that you'll get hurt, have no fear, I will protect you." He just looks at me for a moment. "I swear on my life I will make sure you come back home. In one piece, no burns, not a side dish for a dragon." I smile "The world is indeed full of peril Master Baggins and in it there are many dark places. But it is up to you how you choose to face the darkness and perils of this world."
He looks to the floor then back to me.
"I'm sorry, I can't do it." He says then hesitates before walking a few steps, hesitating a second time before walkingoff.

I walk around the house looking for Gandalf when I hear a deep humming sound. I turn a corner and see all the dwarves standing around the hearth, around a burning fire. I turn about to walk down the next hallway.
“Far over, the misty mountains cold,” Thorin starts to sing stopping me in my tracks so I turn back around and lean on the frame.
“To dungeons deep, and caverns old,
We must away, ere break of day” The others start standing up
“To find our long forgotten gold,” The rest join in the song and I turn around and lean my back on the frame
“The pines were roaring on the height,
The winds were moaning in the night
The fire was red, it flaming spread
The trees like torches blazed with light” They stop singing but continue humming for a short while more. The song stirs memories deep inside me that have long been buried, and others that haunt my every dream. Silence falls and all that can be heard is the crackling of the fire. I head off again in search of Gandalf. I only get a few steps - to the next hallway and look down it to see Gandalf sat outside where all the dwarves are. I walk towards him and he notices me as I walk up to him on his left, he stands up both of us with plain looks on our faces. I hand him the contract and he looks at where the signature goes then turns to face me and smiles.
“You knew I’d sign it, didn’t you?” I ask quietly
“I never had a doubt” he replies in the same tone
The company start coming out of the room, as Balin comes out Gandalf grabs his attention by calling his name.
“Gandalf, how can I help you?” he asks
The wizard hands the contract to Balin who gets an eye glass out of his pocket and looks at my signature.
“Welcome to the company, Lady Chase”
“Ci vilui.” I say in Elvish “Thank you” I repeat so he understands. He smiles and continues walking.
Fili and Kili then walk through the archway
“I trust you’ll be accompanying us” Kili enquires.
“I will be, can’t leave you two unsupervised.” I joke with them “In fact, I’m surprised anyone even wants me to join the quest”
“Just because our uncle shows dislike to you does not mean the rest of us share his opinion” Fili states. I bow my head, and they do the same in return before leaving, I turn back to Gandalf.
“Best get some rest, we leave at first light.” He says to me