Kids Are Forever

Kate’s POV
“This is going to be hard isn’t it mum?” Asher looked up at me from across the bed with tear stained eyes.
“It’s going to be really hard,” I sighed running my hand through Clark’s hair as he laid staring back at me.

“Mum,” his gasped as his voice echoed through the oxygen mask.
I scooped up Zach who protested with a whine wanting to hold onto his brother as I sat down next to Clark.
“Zach stop it,” I held onto him as he began to protest more and more.
“Clark,” he whined pulling away from me.
“Zach stop,” I pulled him back not wanting him to hurt Clark with his swinging legs.
“Clark,” he began crying and slipped out of my arms to wrap his little arms around Clark’s stomach.

“Do you want me to take him out to dad?” Asher began to get up.
“Just leave him,” I didn’t really know what to do. I guess giving Zach the time to be with his brother was all I could for now.
“Dad,” Clark tried to pull off the mask on his face at the mention of his name.
“No sweetie just leave it,” I took his hand, normally he would fight me on something like this but he had not strength and gave in straight away letting me hold onto it.

“Ash go get Dad,” I sat up and panicked as Clark began to breathe more rapidly.
“Zach sit back sweetie,” I grabbed him as he looked up at me with confusion on his little face and set him at the end of the bed.
“Clark shhh it’s ok sweetie, just calm down,” his chest slowed down as he began to quieten down.

“Kate?” Evgeni stood at the door with worry all over his face.
“He wants you,” I picked up Zach to give Evgeni some space.

“Dad,” Clark’s eyes searched the room before they landed on his dad where a wave of relief washed over features.
“Hey buddy,” I watched as Evgeni sat down next to him and Clark tried so hard to get closer to him.

“Mum Nicky needs you,” Asher appeared at the door and to be honest I was little relieved to get out of the room for a moment. I knew there was no way Evgeni was going to stay strong through all of this, he blamed himself right from the beginning and it was just going to get worse so I needed to be there. I needed to be there for all of them, but I needed to be strong. I needed to keep it together so our family would survive this.

Zach didn’t want to leave, he was protesting, he was kicking, he was screaming all to be with his brother but he had to let go sometime and the sooner it happened the better for everyone.

Evgeni’s POV
When I was out with the kids Clark’s doctor came up and explained everything to them. Explained how Clark was feeling, why he wasn’t answering them, why it didn’t seem like Clark at all. The kids just sat and listened and I took it all in as well.

We had come across death before when Kate’s dad died the kids were all there. They understood more than I expected but they didn’t always see Grandpa, this was going to be so different. It was their brother, their best friend he was just not going to be around anymore and as hard as that is to grasp, it was the truth.

“I lay with you?” he mumbled with no energy at all pulling me from my thoughts.
“Come here,” I picked him up and laid him on my chest with his head resting ironically over my heart.

As a baby it always the way he calmed down, listening to my heart beat, it was something my mother had taught me to do with the kids.

“Am I going to die?” he was using up all of energy to look at me.
I sighed and closed my eyes not wanting to tell him but I had to, he was probably scared and wondering what was going on, I don’t think anyone had bothered to tell him.
“Yeah,” I looked down at him and a few stray tears rolled my cheek.
“Is it going to hurt?”
“No it will just be like falling asleep.”
“I don’t want to fall asleep, dad don’t let me fall asleep,” he cried.
“I won’t,” I began to cry myself, “I won’t.”

Right now I would do just about anything to keep him alive but it was wrong. It was unfair to him. There was no way he could keep doing this any longer.

I laid there listening to the machine beeping away slowly, it was his heart beat. It was weak and every once and a while it got slower and slower. It was going to be the last time I would ever hear it.

“Clark,” I ran my hand through his hair just to check that he was still with me.
His eyes opened just a crack and I knew we didn’t have much longer as the light seemed to be just disappearing in them.

Slowly my child was no longer going to be there, it would be his body, but not him. It wouldn’t be my Clark.

Kate came back in and it was like he was holding on just for her. Like he knew she wasn’t there but didn’t want to go until his mum was with him.

The nurse took away his oxygen mask, she took out the needles, all the things that distracted us from him to where he was just lying as if he was sleeping peacefully like any other night.

Kate slipped into the bed with me and rested her head on mine as we both looked down at our son. His breathing had slowed and he no longer moved or responded to his name. He was quiet literally slipping away.

“I love you Clark,” Kate pressed a kiss to his forehead.
“Goodbye,” she buried her face into his neck and cried.

I didn’t want to say it, I didn’t want to believe he was going, that he was slowly leaving us all here on this earth to deal with pain.
“No Clark, you can’t,” I cried holding onto him tighter.

I was trying so hard to keep it together. But as he breathed that last breath, as his heart beated that last beat I knew my life had changed forever.

“Goodbye Clark. I will love forever,” I pressed a final kiss to his forehead.