Devour my Soul

My fingers brushed over the flat surface, smoothing over my rock hard hair coated with too much mousse. My face was just as bad, almost stiff with the layers of foundation and powder caking my skin. Self-consciousness was already playing in my thoughts, asking me if I really intended to walk out the door looking like I’d been attacked by the protégés of a make-up academy. Well, I actually had been. I couldn’t be sure whether Hayden’s mother had been saving costs, or wanted me to look like a circus clown.

It wasn’t necessarily the fact that I looked hideous; in fact, I could probably be called stunning as I silently gazed at my appearance in the floor length mirror. I could barely walk in the white mermaid dress wrapped tightly around my body since the monster in law had bought a size too small, and when approached about the subject, she’d blamed the excess eating I had taken up.

The strong scent of hair product hung about me in a cloud, mixing with the dry powder and making me sneeze every few minutes. Breathing a deep sigh, my heart began to pump nervously as the music drifting through my ears suddenly changed. The beautiful harp floated away, replacing its harmonious strokes with a stronger melody.

“Selena? It’s time to go,” came a muffled voice from outside the door.

I nodded, even though Hayden’s father clearly couldn’t see me, and took another deep breath. He was walking me down the aisle, though it wasn’t traditional. I just couldn’t say no when he’d offered. One accepting parent was better than none, and I was grateful that Hayden’s father was welcoming me into the family.

The man provided me a brief reminding knock just as I gave myself a final once over before plucking my bouquet off the table. It was heavy, and much too extravagant for my taste. The pink roses were laced with pearls and wrapped with white ribbon. A beautiful bouquet, but I was unsteady under its weight, and would probably look comedic leaning heavily against Hayden’s father.

Plastering a wide smile on my face, I opened the dressing room door, choking back a greeting as I looked into the face of not Hayden’s father, but Evan fucking Phillips. Completely aware of my painted lips hanging open in utter shock, I remained frozen, unblinking as I waited for Antheon to quit playing mind games.

Evan leaned forward, his mouth widening into a cheesy grin as his sea green eyes twinkled with obvious amusement. “You look beautiful,” he whispered loudly, taking my hand and planting a soft kiss over my knuckles.

“What – what – what –” I was spluttering, my mouth gaping like a fish out of water.

Evan gave a deep throaty laugh, turning to the side and offering an arm out to me. Hesitantly, my gaze turned down to it, probably looking stupid as I wondered what the hell was happening and cursing Antheon for coming up with this clever scheme. Surely Evan wasn’t really here. It was Hayden’s father, and Antheon was up to his tricks. Hoping I didn’t appear insane, I took the man’s arm lightly, following as he slowly led me to the doors of the church.

“You shouldn’t be doing this,” my escort growled. “We’re soul mates, you and I. You should leave with me now.”

I merely smiled faintly, unsure whether I should trust his words. Had Antheon become that good? He’d been subtly sneaking Evan’s body into my thoughts whenever I was making love to Hayden. Had he penetrated my mind so deeply to mimic my soul mate’s voice as well? Pressing my lips together, I stifled a groan. My feet stung with a blistering pain, knowing my shoes were too small. I desperately wanted them off my feet, so I could heal and relieve the ache but the wide mahogany doors of the church were fast approaching.

Glowering under a storming cloud of hate towards my imminent mother in law, I waited in silence as my escort mumbled more words of discouragement. I successfully ignored them, listening intently for our cue to advance down the aisle. And there it was. A moment’s pause before the strong thick strokes of the organ began belting out a familiar tune accustomed to the traditional wedding.

My legs were shaking as we started our march down the wine red carpet, ignoring the rose petals scattered beneath our feet, my eyes focused intently on the man standing at the top of the small flight of stairs, covered in white and gold robes. The sound of the organ rang in my ears, deafening me to all the world around me. I was in a bubble. A cocoon wrapping me in blissful ignorance until my eyes fell on Hayden.

It was then that I knew that something was wrong. Hayden’s brows turned down into a frown, not smiling as I’d thought he would be. His shoulders were squared and tense, almost as if he were sizing himself up to something, and I knew exactly what that something was.

My step faltered slightly, as I started to notice the confused stares of the guests seated in the pews. Their eyes weren’t trained on me. They were trained on my escort. The escort I didn’t dare turn to look at. Suddenly the heat left behind from his breath as he’d whispered to me earlier lit up in heat, spreading to the rest of my face, and down my neck. We’d reached the end of the aisle, the music coming to a long finish as I hastily let go of my escort and scrambled up the few stairs.

Silence met my arrival as if the room had taken a breath and held it. Hayden’s mother glared in disapproval at me from her seat, and her husband was seated beside her with a kind smile. From the corner of my eye, my escort stood at the bottom of the small flight of stairs with his hands folded neatly in front of him.

I knew I looked as panicked as I felt. My chest was heaving faster than usual, and my hands trembled involuntarily. Then, when I looked up into Hayden’s hurt eyes, I crumbled even more. My head was shaking, my toes scrunching as much as they could in their too tight shoes and my fingers clenched Hayden’s tightly as we faced each other. This was it. It was happening.

I barely heard the priest as he flew through his well practiced lines. I could only focus on the fact that my dress was starting to become even more constricting, and my forehead was beginning to sweat. Hayden’s voice drifted through my thoughts, snapping me out of my trance as I realised he’d said something.

“Huh?” I mumbled dumbly.

“I’m sorry, I can’t do this,” Hayden said a little more loudly, regret filling his eyes as he then turned to our guests. “I thought I could fill the void, but I can’t.” Then turning back to me, his mouth set in a grim line; his warning face as I’d come to recognise. “I love you Ellie, but I will always love Daniella with all of my being, and that’s not fair on you.”

That was what this was. An escape route for me after watching as I walked down the aisle on the arm of my soul mate. Tears welled in my eyes as I watched Hayden try to calm down the gasps chorusing from the guests.

Suddenly, tears were streaming down my face, and I was crumpling to the floor, until a pair of strong arms caught me. Green eyes swirled in my vision, Antheon grumbled in delight and I fell into a dark unconsciousness.