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FIVE
She's talking to someone the next time I go in. The stores closes at midnight, but it's eleven thirty and I'm wide awake.
"-he won't stop crying," the second girl says. Neither noticed my entrance. I bid my time in front of the fridge, looking at their selection of beer. Alcohol is off limits for me. I don't know why I'm standing in front of temptation.
"Where is he right now?" Helen's soft words are laced with anger. It's the first real emotion I've seen- well, heard- from her.
"I left him in the crib. He's fine," this comes from the second girl.
"Estelle!" Helen actually shouts.
"God, calm down. Abby's watching him; I'm not a complete idiot."
Helen's sigh rings across the store. "That wasn't funny. Look, I'll be home in an hour. Can you guys wait that long?"
I've made my up to the aisle with pain relievers. Over the short display, I can see both of them. The second girl looks a lot like Helen. Though they both have red hair, Helen's is more like cinnamon, and the other is more like a shock of cherry. "Why can't you lock up now? It's not like there's anyone-" she stops and they simultaneously look at me. My face burns at being caught. The girl huffs. "Just hurry up," she whines once more and turns on her heel. Helen stares after her for a second, her features twisted into a grimace.
"I'm sorry," I find myself saying. "I'll go. You look like you're needed somewhere else." I don't want to leave.
"No, it's fine," she sighs. I think that's all I'm going to get but she continues on, pleasantly surprising me. "That's my sister. My family's a pain, you know?"
No, I don't really know. But I'm so happy she's talking to me I pretend I do. "Oh, yeah. Totally." Jesus. Is that the best I can do? Totally? She starts to straighten some magazines near the register and for once, she isn't standing behind it. I take the opportunity to look at her shoes. God, she's got great feet. Her moccasins are worn and dirty, but they've got character. Her shoes pivot to face me. I look up to meet her eyes.
"Was there something you needed?"
Yes. You.
"Um, Camel blues, I guess."
She walks behind the counter. "You smoke an awful lot," she doesn't say this accusingly. It's an observation. Cool indifference, like every other part of her. I admire it.
"It's a bad habit."
"Probably. But it's your life, you should do what you want."
God, I love you.
"You seem to be the only person that thinks that." I hand her a twenty. She gives me the change and, light as a feather, her ring finger brushes against mine. Electricity shoots through my arm.
"Yeah? That's too bad," the velvet has a hint of finality. It's obvious the conversation is coming to an end but I'll be damned if we made this much progress for nothing. If there's anything I've learned from that near death experience it's that you can't wait for things to happen. Seize the day and all that shit.
"I'm Sebastian," I offer.
I'm blessed with a small smile as she tells me her name.
"-he won't stop crying," the second girl says. Neither noticed my entrance. I bid my time in front of the fridge, looking at their selection of beer. Alcohol is off limits for me. I don't know why I'm standing in front of temptation.
"Where is he right now?" Helen's soft words are laced with anger. It's the first real emotion I've seen- well, heard- from her.
"I left him in the crib. He's fine," this comes from the second girl.
"Estelle!" Helen actually shouts.
"God, calm down. Abby's watching him; I'm not a complete idiot."
Helen's sigh rings across the store. "That wasn't funny. Look, I'll be home in an hour. Can you guys wait that long?"
I've made my up to the aisle with pain relievers. Over the short display, I can see both of them. The second girl looks a lot like Helen. Though they both have red hair, Helen's is more like cinnamon, and the other is more like a shock of cherry. "Why can't you lock up now? It's not like there's anyone-" she stops and they simultaneously look at me. My face burns at being caught. The girl huffs. "Just hurry up," she whines once more and turns on her heel. Helen stares after her for a second, her features twisted into a grimace.
"I'm sorry," I find myself saying. "I'll go. You look like you're needed somewhere else." I don't want to leave.
"No, it's fine," she sighs. I think that's all I'm going to get but she continues on, pleasantly surprising me. "That's my sister. My family's a pain, you know?"
No, I don't really know. But I'm so happy she's talking to me I pretend I do. "Oh, yeah. Totally." Jesus. Is that the best I can do? Totally? She starts to straighten some magazines near the register and for once, she isn't standing behind it. I take the opportunity to look at her shoes. God, she's got great feet. Her moccasins are worn and dirty, but they've got character. Her shoes pivot to face me. I look up to meet her eyes.
"Was there something you needed?"
Yes. You.
"Um, Camel blues, I guess."
She walks behind the counter. "You smoke an awful lot," she doesn't say this accusingly. It's an observation. Cool indifference, like every other part of her. I admire it.
"It's a bad habit."
"Probably. But it's your life, you should do what you want."
God, I love you.
"You seem to be the only person that thinks that." I hand her a twenty. She gives me the change and, light as a feather, her ring finger brushes against mine. Electricity shoots through my arm.
"Yeah? That's too bad," the velvet has a hint of finality. It's obvious the conversation is coming to an end but I'll be damned if we made this much progress for nothing. If there's anything I've learned from that near death experience it's that you can't wait for things to happen. Seize the day and all that shit.
"I'm Sebastian," I offer.
I'm blessed with a small smile as she tells me her name.