Extinguish the Sun (Then Light My Way Home)

The stars had not graced us with their presence that night, no; they remained hidden behind a canvas of black, watching from behind a screen. They’re mocking really, so bright, so beautiful, so unobtainable. Out of reach and just a dream, like all the fairy tales and legends we’re told as children. I never really believed them, the stories the adults told as ways to teach us moral lessons, to help us sleep, to scare us away from wrong-doing. I never believed but that doesn’t mean I never imagined. Some nights, I would lie there, still linked to reality by insomnia, just thinking and wondering. Childhood innocence. I had it once, note the use of past tense. I’ve lost it now, it was washed away in alcohol and drowned in the common problems I never thought I’d had to face.

Bills, accommodation, food, getting a job.

I could pinpoint the time, tell you the exact date I stopped dreaming and started living. The day that fiction became fact and the unknown showed its face, as unwanted as it may have seemed at the time.

Like I said, it was dark, quiet too, like someone had thrown a blanket over the city and muffled all the noise of people living out their lives, so unaware. Just mildly uncomfortable silence, broken only by the sound of my footsteps, gravel crunching under black Converse. The hollow noise, like a one person army, marching towards nowhere in particular. I can’t recall if I was going somewhere in particular, or just looking for the first place that looked familiar. The flickering neon’s on bar signs, the rusting letters of diners, my front door, anywhere really. Most people would have thought it sad, Saturday night and nowhere to go, nowhere to be.

Still, I had had somewhere to be, I’d been to a concert. I love concerts by the way, the vibration of the bass pulsing across your skin, drums pounding in time with your heart, vocals reaching out, wrapping around your body, the press of people, just being. Not caring about anything but right there and right then.

But now, after encores, last calls for drinks and the steady flow of people dribbling out of the venue, I was alone.

Well, so it would’ve appeared.

Akane Road.

I won’t forget it anytime soon.

Artificial light from overhead streetlights bathed sections of the pavement. Glowing circles every few metres, light spreading outwards before coming to a halt and collapsing into darkness again.
He was standing in a dark space, between two lights on a corner, tucked away.

I only saw him when I was a foot away.

The marching noise of footsteps stopped, apparently so had I.

His eyes caught my attention first, a collision of hazel and emerald streams, mixed in a pool, left to sparkle in the sun, still glittering in the dark.

Then his hair, midnight black, long enough that it could be found socially unacceptable in some of the smaller, more traditional towns. Pale, milky skin, not quite vampiric, but hardly tan.

Pretty.

Most guys wouldn’t appreciate being called that, but I had a feeling he wouldn't mind.
My heart beat just a little faster simply, because I just couldn't believe who I was standing in front of, just an arm’s length away. A smile started to form on my face, I could feel it.

“I’m-” We both started at the same time. I was thankful for the dim light, glad that he couldn't see the light pink on my cheeks.

“You first” He said, and smiled. It was small, faintly amused and... sad?

“Hi, I’m Brendon, and wow, you don’t need to introduce yourself, I mean I know who you are, I just want to say how amazing it is to meet you, Gerard, your band is an inspiration to me” I gushed. I blamed the fan-boyish hormones.

He laughed, quiet and brief, low and unguarded.

“Thanks, I wasn’t going to say ‘I’m Gerard’ though”

“Oh?”

He lowered his gaze, finding the ground rather interesting now, even though chances were he couldn’t see it in the dark.

“No. I was going to say, I’m…”

“Yes?” I prompted, quiet and gentle.

He looked up now, green-brown eyes meeting my chocolate ones.

“Sorry”

He moved forward. Fast. Cold hands grabbed my waist, his body moved closer to mine.

Lips touched my neck, teeth pierced my skin.

My vision dulled around the edges, colour fading fast. Strong arms still held me, tight and protective.

“I’m so, so sorry” Disjointed words, a murmur coming from somewhere I could no longer see.

So long and goodnight.

“No, you will awake, I promise”

I wasn't aware I had said that aloud.

My last grip on consciousness loosened and I slipped, into the darkness, into the silence.
The stars didn't show their faces that night, maybe they knew it was going to happen and couldn't bear to watch. Maybe they just turned their backs on me, because they weren't interested and simply didn't care.

They wouldn't be the first…

************

Pain.

It was too bright, unbearably bright, streaming sunlight bouncing off my closed eyelids. I shifted slightly; my joint’s surprisingly responsive considering I had just woken up. I opened my eyes slowly, letting my pupils adjust and focus on the surroundings; it was not at all comforting to find them unfamiliar. I sat up a little straighter, feeling the cool cotton of someone else’s sheets under me. Considering the - quite frankly scary - lack of details I could remember about last night, I was just happy that I was in fact still wearing my clothes and lying on the plain sheets rather than in them. I was also happy to be alone, but because it’s me and fate holds a grudge, Murphy’s Law came into play.

Knock, knock.

I didn’t reply but they didn’t wait for a response before coming in. Since it’s assumedly the apartment’s owner though, I don’t think they are actually required to knock to enter their own rooms.

Black hair became visible, and the rest of the man came into view. I know those eyes- oh!
Now, I remember. Whether I wanted to or not is debatable but the memories came back none the less.

He moved slowly, raised his hands just above his waist in a small white-flag gesture.

“How are you feeling” He sounded… ashamed.

In fact, upon a closer look, he looked ready to cry. He visibly fidgeted, and looked thoroughly uncomfortable and small.

“Um, okay I guess, well as okay as you can be when you wake up in a stranger’s bed with no idea what’s going on”

He shifted forward slightly, as if trying to decide whether to sit down next to me or not. I lightly patted the bed, hoping it would make him more comfortable if I seemed like I wasn't scared of him (like my mother used to say “smile though you’re crying inside, put on a brave face even if you want to hide”) So I acted like I was fine sitting next to the man that attacked me.

He took my silent invitation and sat down next to me, the bed dipping with the added weight.

He looked up at me, wide eyed and vulnerable like a scolded child.

“So, where should I start? Do you want a detailed account or straight facts?”

I was just happy he was willing to share, I don’t like being out of the loop, especially when I’m directly involved.

“Straight facts” I replied, I needed base facts before I pieced everything else together. Like on a puzzle, start with the corners and the pieces you are sure of, and work from there.

A faint smile. I wish he’d do it more to be honest, he lights up when he smiles, seems more approachable.

“Fire away” he said, my mind automatically thinking of his lyrics. Fire at will.

“Let’s start with where” I suggested.

“Specifically? My room. Less specifically? Las Vegas, Nevada”

I remember my thoughts exactly. Nevada? I was in England! I can’t just continent jump over night it doesn't work like that, okay!? And also, it’s NEVADA. Anywhere but here would have been better but like I said, fate and luck hold grudges.

“Yeah, um, private flights because of the band and all” his hand went to the back of his neck, brushing against his long hair.

It was plausible, still it was time to ask basic questions now and over analyse the details later.

“What about when?”

“It’s currently just gone two in the afternoon and it’s September 7th”

“Most importantly, why? And what the hell did you do to my neck? You a vampire or something?” I said it with humour but my brain was yelling ‘God I hope not, is that even possible?!’

He went quiet, like the words had been stolen from him, leaving him empty with nothing to say.

“No, not exactly. I’m as human as you or anyone of those people down there on the streets for all but 1 day a month. It’s not an obsession, or a need, just a thirst, just a want. Last day of the month and I want blood, I tried to resist but you were right there. Once again, I’m so sorry”

“So am I like you now?” Warning bells. Warning bells.

“No.”
…

“Well, um, not to be rude but why am I here then?”

His lips quirked on one side.

“Some people get ill after the experience, so to keep you safe I had to bring you here, where I can treat you immediately if anything was to happen”

“Okay, have a shown any signs of these illnesses?” I asked, worry setting in.

For the first time since I first saw him he smiled fully.

“Thankfully no.” He paused. “So, I was thinking, since last night probably sucked for you, I could take you out for coffee and show you Vegas, I’ll treat you like a princess and do everything you want, I swear” He was still smiling, I hoped he never stopped.

“Sounds good. I already have a request though and that’s either shut the goddamn curtains or extinguish the sun because the light is bugging me”

More quiet laughter as he moved from the bed and pulled the pale blue curtains closed.

I was quite happy to let Gerard show me Vegas, after all, it had probably changed a lot since I had last been here three years previous. I used to live here with my family, before I left, before the fight, before everything was ruined.

I was right of course about Vegas changing, and later that day as we sat on the roof to the apartment block, watching the lights on the strip, I realised something. The stars were shining here. Maybe they weren’t hiding in England because they were turning their backs on me, maybe they were just leading me back home. That thought might have been part of the reason I decided to do it. The next morning I picked up my mobile and dialled a number I hadn’t in three years.

“Hey mum, it’s me, Brendon.”