To Live and Let Go

III

Maybe I overreacted. No way would this Flyzik lad skin me alive, he moved on pretty quick, and was already attending to the band for their little greet with the fans. I begged Poppy to let me go have a fag whilst she fannied about waiting to see the band too, so instead I waited to the side, clawing the back of my hand as I thought about the box of cigarettes in my pocket. I really should give up soon.

I noticed things got a little lively and took that as a hint that the band had showed up so I decided to slip outside whilst Poppy wasn’t looking. I lit my cigarette as soon as it sat between my lips and the air brushed against my face. I felt possessed and as I sat in the slight rain fall, trying to shield my cigarette.

I became so engrossed in my cigarette that I began to stare aimlessly ahead. My thoughts began to settle on problems I had forgotten existed. I had been like this for a while and after a while, my problems became unclear and I couldn’t quite figure out why they were stressful to me.

One cigarettes turned into three and I was more than wet which made me feel irritated so I left the gloomy darkness for the warmth of the indoors and noticed Poppy’s dark blue hair instantly. She had her arm round the Band’s singer - Alex, I think. I approached them but made sure that I sure I was out of their photo.

After the blinding flash, the randomer gave Poppy her camera back and she couldn’t stop smiling and it was infectious. She looked up at me and gave an excited wave.

“Alex, this is my good friend, Faye.” she introduced.

He laughed and waved, “Hey.”

I couldn’t help feel a little giggly and smiled uncontrollably and stuck out my hand for a handshake. I was unsure why I asked for a handshake but it happened and I couldn't change that fact. He took hold of me hand and we shook. By far the strangest thing I’ve ever asked for from a famous person, to be honest.

We allowed Alex to leave our side and Poppy couldn’t help but squeal with excitement, going on about how she had a photo with nearly everyone.

“Who’s left then?” I asked with confusion.

“Flyzik. Though that might be impossible.” She laughed.

“He’s- actually, I don’t want to get confused.”

“What?” she laughed.

“Don’t worry about it.”

A girl approached her friends who were beside us and whined: “Flyzik wouldn’t even get a photo with me!”

I scrunched up my nose, frowning hard, and looked about for Flyzik to see him with a couple of roadies and he did seem very busy like the other times I had seen him. I turned round.

“Oh, shut up, would you? The man is clearly busy and if you were fan, you would accept that.” I snapped.

She pulled a face and pushed her friends to go, her following. I rubbed my hand and turned around. Pretty much everyone had gone quiet and what was worse was that once again Matt had noticed my existence and I was forced to restrain myself, biting my tongue.
And then he smiled. I swallowed and couldn’t help allow a smile to crack through.

***

After a warm shower, I rubbed my hair dry with a towel as I approached my laptop which was set up at my desk by the TV. I fell into the seat and was spooked by a sudden notification on facebook by Poppy. Get you arse on Tumblr and check out these photos...

I clicked on the link she had attached to the message and scrolled through the endless photos of us being goons on her Tumblr space and pictures others had taken of the same concert we were not long at. I got not that far through them when things began to look very memorable of the last moments of the night where I shouted at the girl. Strangely someone filmed it- it wasn’t that special- but then they captured Flyzik smiling.

I face palmed the keyboard. He’s just a randomer, I told myself. Nothing to become to- attachment isn’t necessary.