You & I

Chris's house was surprisingly normal. I guess I had been expecting something ludicrously over the top, with art deco paintings of his face on the walls and a TV that came out from behind a secret panel. Actually, I had no clue why I let my mind paint out this picture of an ostentatious house, especially since I knew Chris and that was not his style. He liked home comforts and this was reflected in his home. Just the usual ordinary furniture, though with surprisingly more sports memorabilia then movie props. There were loads of photo's of his family and friends. I suspected he had some sketches hidden around the place somewhere which I was determined to find at some point. He had told me that he still liked to draw when he could find the time.

The only thing which set Chris apart from the average guy, was the fact that he did own a house in the nice part of town. While 90% of other 18 - 35 year olds were living in shared apartments. Or at most had recently gotten a mortgage they would be paying off for the next 50 years.

"You said that your friend's an actor, he must have some serious talent judging by this place." Jackson said to me as we walked into a sea of people. Chris knew a lot of people - or a lot of people knew Chris.

"Oh, he's ok," I smiled up at him. My gaze drifted downwards to where our hands were locked. I was fully aware that Jackson had taken my hand when we walked in. It had just been so we wouldn't lose each other and I was trying to keep focusing on the fact. Our first kiss was already out of the way, so what did a bit of innocent hand-holding matter?

It just felt weird because I wasn't a hand-holding kind of girl. That's all.

With his other hand he held a six pack of beer to his chest. He'd had them with him when he came to pick me up again for the party, after dropping me off an hour earlier so that I could scrub the florescent pink paint out of my hair. Jackson had done a lot of driving around for my benefit tonight. And he had been thoughtful enough to turn up with drinks for the party. The oversight of number of guests was actually my fault because I told him it would be a gathering of just a few people.

Boy I'm naive sometimes. In future I'll know what Chris really means when he says party.

"Gracie!" The Australian twang in Tara's voice was easy to pick out over the battle of chatter and music in the lounge. She made her way over with a huge grin on her face, one which grew when she saw Jackson.

I swear to God Tara, if you embarrass me I will shave off one of your eyebrows while you're sleeping.

"I'm so glad you both made it." Tara hugged me and stepped back to take in the two of us. "You're cuter than I remember." Tara purred approvingly at Jackson. "The two of you make a beautiful couple."

My glare was so intense I'm surprised I didn't burn two holes straight through her head. Tara noticed, and only grinned more - if that was even possible at this point.

"Tara!" A guys voice called over the music. Tara looked over her shoulder and waved him over.

"I'm going to find the kitchen." Jackson held up the beers and I nodded, motioning that I would stay with Tara. He released my hand and went off in search of the kitchen. My arm fell limp at my side. It's weird not knowing what to do with your arm/hand when someone's let go.

See, this is why I don't hold hands. I over think the simple things.

I scanned the crowd for Chris, but couldn't see him. The guy who had called Tara now came to her side. I didn't recognize him, but it didn't surprise me that Tara had made a friend (or many) in my absence. She's the only person I know who can be so completely at ease walking in to a party where she doesn't really know anybody. She had only been around Chris when I was there.

"This is Grace." She told the guy happily. He was cute in that gym-enthusiast kind of way. He raised a brow and looked me over, which I did not appreciate, before introducing himself.

"Zack."

It was a minute or two before the name registered in my brain. "Would you happen to be Boston Zack?"

"The one and only," he grinned, "and you're Grace. I've heard about you."

"Sounds ominous." I said.

"It was only good things." The way he said it, I don't know, maybe it was the tinge of accent but it made me laugh.

"Somehow I doubt that."
Clearly there was more going on here than I knew about, I would have to wrestle the truth from Tara later, because Jackson was nowhere in sight and I was beginning to feel bad for letting him go off alone when the only people he knew were right here. "I'm going to see where Jackson's got too, which way's the kitchen?" I asked them.

Leaving them there, I went in the direction Zack had pointed to. Really, there should have been some freak occurrence of nature when Tara and Zack's paths crossed. Like a lightening storm or a small earthquake. Chris had told me some pretty wild stories about the guy, and Tara wasn't known for being angelic. Maybe I shouldn't have left them alone just now...

Any thought of going back to them and waiting for Jackson to come back to us vanished from my head the minute I walked into the kitchen. Because there was Jackson - and he was talking to Chris.

Oh shit.

I moved towards them much too quickly for it to seem natural.
"Hey Grace," Chris saw me first and embraced me in a one armed hug, holding a beer in the other hand. Then he handed me a beer from somewhere as I stood between the two of them. The conversation passing between them had ended and now they appeared to be pretty relaxed in each others company.

No, no, no. They can not start some kind of bromance. I am completely against the idea. It is unnatural.

"So..." I started, racking my brain for something casual to say. "I just met Zack."

"Yeah?" Chris said.

"And he's now hanging out with Tara."

"Oh shit, really?" Chris chuckled. "I better get out there." Either my wording was spot on, or Chris was telepathically receiving my messages to leave.

An hour later I was leaning against the the balcony outside, overlooking the backyard. Below I could hear the smokers and those who had come outside for some fresh air. Ironic that they were now talking to said smokers if they wanted fresh air. I heard the balcony door open behind me but I didn't turn. I thought it was Jackson and that he had come to find me because I had just wandered off, leaving him to chat to some musician.

It wasn't Jackson. I knew that the second the breeze whistled past us both and I caught the scent of that subtle cologne.
Chris leaned over the railings beside me, facing out. There were a few minutes of silence before he spoke.

"So Jackson seems like a cool guy."

"Yeah."

"Did you have fun on your date?" He asked.

"Yeah."
Though I still didn't look his way, I knew he would be frowning. I was a rambler by nature and now I was resolved to one word answers. I couldn't explain it. I didn't quite understand myself.

"Grace."

I couldn't help it. It was the way he said my name, almost tenderly. So I looked at him.
I wished he was wasn't standing so close. I wished I could get over this damn crush that was spiraling into something that could never be. He gave me the full effect of that boyish grin and reached out to take a strand of my hair. "You have paint in your hair."

Why are you doing this to me? Why are you irrevocably fucking up my 'care-less' attitude towards men?

"Is something wrong Grace?" Chris asked. "Remember I made you promise that you would talk to me if there was something bothering you."

The sound of the balcony door opening brought me back to reality with a thump. We both turned to see Jackson standing in the doorway.
"I've been looking for you," he said. "Tara said she's leaving soon."

"Sorry, I needed some air." I moved away from Chris and towards Jackson. "I think I'm going to head home. I've had a headache since we got here and it's starting to feel like someone's hitting my head with a frying-pan. You can stay if you want."

"I'll drive you home." Jackson said without a second thought.

I looked back at Chris. He had this lost expression on his face. I hadn't resolved any of his concern and apparently it more than perturbed him. "I'll call you tomorrow Grace?" It sounded like a question, but I knew he would.

"Yeah." I replied. Whoa, when did one word answers become my thing? That annoying inner voice was telling me to go over to him and give him the usual hug goodbye. I didn't. I said nothing more, pulled the balcony door shut behind me and left with Jackson.