Safe & Sound

Adam:

I had just gotten home from our road trip and walked inside our apartment. I put my bags down and walked into Jean-Marc's room to find everything destroyed. Nicole. I picked up a Boston Bruins bear in my jersey and sat on the floor. I know, I knew Jean-Marc wasn't my son, but I just, I wanted him to be so bad. I wanted to be a dad, a parent, with Nicole. I understand why she lied, I honestly don't blame her, but it hurts that she feels like I shouldn't be upset.

I felt hands wrap around my waist, it was Nicole. She rested her head on my back, I wiped my tears and tried to get up. "Adam stop." She wrapped me in a hug and I held back the tears. "I called my mom, I called all of my family." "Adam stop." "They were all really upset. They said they are sorry and if you need anything-" "Adam stop." "What?" "Stop trying to be strong and distract yourself from what happened. "I looked Nicole in the eyes and began crying. She just wrapped me in a hug and sat on the floor with me. "I'm sorry Nicole. I mean why you? You didn't deserve this, you didn't deserve to have this happen to you." "Thank you, but it already happened. There's no changing it." I sat up looking at her and wiped my tears. "How are you fine with this? How are you not crying your eyes out right now?" "Because I've cried enough over the loss. What I want to know is, are you okay? I'm more worried about you. I treated you like an ass. I was rude and I shouldn't have told you that you can't be upset. I was wrong, and I'm sorry. I just can't live with myself knowing that, I hurt one of the best guys that could ever come into my life." She stood up walking around the trashed room.

"I mean it's what I do though right? I hurt everyone that comes into my life, I just can't seem to ever get it right I guess." "No, Nicole, you're wrong." I walked over to her. "You have made so many people's lives better because you've come into them. Look at Tyler, you have changed that kid for the better. Since his first year here, he is a much better guy, trust me. And me, Nicole you didn't hurt me, well I mean you did, but I'm fine now. You don't realize how amazing you are, how kind, beautiful, smart, funny, loving, god I could go on forever. There is nothing wrong with you. But that's the one thing that is wrong with you, you think there is something wrong with you and you are constantly trying to figure it out. But what you don't understand is, you are perfect, in your own imperfect way, you are. Are you know what would truly make me happy?" She looked up at me with tears in her eyes. "Go be with Tyler." She shook her head and let tears fall. "No, no, stop." I wrapped her in a hug. "I know it's what you want, it doesn't hurt my feelings. okay? Go be with Tyler, forever, start a family, have another Jean-Marc with him. What would make me the happiest was if you did what I'm asking. Sure, it's gonna hurt knowing you're not mine. But then again, you never really were." I kissed her forehead and looked past her at the doorway. She quickly turned around to see Tyler standing there. She walked over and gave him a hug.

I walked slowly past them, but Tyler stopped me. "Adam, thank you. I heard all of it, and I really appreciate what you said. Maybe you aren't so bad after all." We both laughed and Nicole looked up at me. "Thank you, Adam." She gave me a hug and a kiss on the cheek. "I'm always going to love you, you were there for me when no one was, and I can never thank you enough for that." Trust me, no thanks is needed. All I want is to see you happy, and I know this is what needs to happen for everyone to be happy. It's the right thing. But I will always love you too Nicole, you're perfect." 'In my own imperfect way." I gave her one last hug and she and Tyler left. I know it wasn't the ideal scenario I could have thought of for me and Nicole, but all I ever wanted was her to be happy, and that's with Tyler, not me.