Anorexic Neighborhood
Anorexic Neighborhood (part eight)
When the movie ended, I was exhausted. Veronica and Pam wanted more time together, and it was nearing midnight by the time we left the mall. They decided to stop at Dennys. I didn't want to go there at all. When we got there, I told them I wasn't hungry. Instead I drank bottomless coffee, and smoked my lovely cigarettes.
"Hey!" I remembered. "Did you guys see that girl? She was really skinny, and kept staring at me everywhere I went it seemed." I went on. "She looked like she was majorly Anorexic." They just stared at me. Pam looking uncomfortable, and Veronica holding my gaze intently with her own.
"Ashley..." Veronica struggled. "What?" I asked her annoyed. "Ash, I had a friend in Ohio who died of an eating disorder." She paused. "I'm worried your going to be the same way, if you don't eat something."
I looked at her. "I'm sorry about your friend." Really I am, but I'm not that bad am I?" They both looked at me and nodded. "Will you just eat something?" Pam asked. I wasn't hungry, and didn't feel like eating anything. It's like the whole world wants me fat! I thought angrily.
"Fine" I mumbled. They ordered me some gross sandwich, and I just stared at it for a long time. Finally I wound up eating most of it. As soon as I felt nauseous, I told them I would be right back, I just needed to use the restroom. Veronica stopped me. "No way." You'll just throw up, and I can't trust you right now." She told me. "You have to wait fifteen minutes." Fine I thought. I'll just throw up then.
When I got there I couldn't! There were people coming in and out. I went into a stall and without my permission my stomach got rid of everything I consumed just then in an instant. I felt betrayed, but worlds better. I felt guilty about lying to Veronica, and tried my hardest to make it seem like I neve threw up.
She believed me and we headed back to our houses. My Mom was sleeping, but my sisters were both awake watching some movie. "Hi my sister dears!" I greeted them. I didn't realize how much I actually missed them. I loved them so much, they were amazing in my book. I decided to stay up with them and watch a movie. I made them laugh like I used to, and wound up falling asleep on the couch.
I woke up the next morning to someone sobbing. It was my sister Nikki. She was watching me sleep, and sobbing to death.
"Hey!" I remembered. "Did you guys see that girl? She was really skinny, and kept staring at me everywhere I went it seemed." I went on. "She looked like she was majorly Anorexic." They just stared at me. Pam looking uncomfortable, and Veronica holding my gaze intently with her own.
"Ashley..." Veronica struggled. "What?" I asked her annoyed. "Ash, I had a friend in Ohio who died of an eating disorder." She paused. "I'm worried your going to be the same way, if you don't eat something."
I looked at her. "I'm sorry about your friend." Really I am, but I'm not that bad am I?" They both looked at me and nodded. "Will you just eat something?" Pam asked. I wasn't hungry, and didn't feel like eating anything. It's like the whole world wants me fat! I thought angrily.
"Fine" I mumbled. They ordered me some gross sandwich, and I just stared at it for a long time. Finally I wound up eating most of it. As soon as I felt nauseous, I told them I would be right back, I just needed to use the restroom. Veronica stopped me. "No way." You'll just throw up, and I can't trust you right now." She told me. "You have to wait fifteen minutes." Fine I thought. I'll just throw up then.
When I got there I couldn't! There were people coming in and out. I went into a stall and without my permission my stomach got rid of everything I consumed just then in an instant. I felt betrayed, but worlds better. I felt guilty about lying to Veronica, and tried my hardest to make it seem like I neve threw up.
She believed me and we headed back to our houses. My Mom was sleeping, but my sisters were both awake watching some movie. "Hi my sister dears!" I greeted them. I didn't realize how much I actually missed them. I loved them so much, they were amazing in my book. I decided to stay up with them and watch a movie. I made them laugh like I used to, and wound up falling asleep on the couch.
I woke up the next morning to someone sobbing. It was my sister Nikki. She was watching me sleep, and sobbing to death.