Anorexic Neighborhood
ANOREXIC nEIGHBORHOOD (part nine)
I sat up automatically. I immediately grew dizzy, and I had to close my eyes, in order to stop spinning. I looked at my sister, still crying. What was she crying about? "Nikki, what's wrong? Why are you crying your head off, and why are you staring at me? Is everything okay?" My mind was racing with different possibilities. I was so exhausted I had to strain to keep my eyes open, even then I couldn't really focus, I tried to bring my full attention to my sister.
"Why are you so skinny." She sobbed. I looked at her, not knowing what to say, my head was pounding, I felt the beginnings of a serious headache creeping up on me. "Is that why your crying?" I asked her groggily. I yawned. "Nikki, I'm not that skinny, there's no need to get all sappy about it." She looked at me angrily. "Yeah I know why your skinny. You've been starving yourself for months now Ashley!" She glared at me knowingly. I was at a loss for words. "I eat" I told her not exactly with conviction. "Where does it go Ashley? The toilet?" She asked me accusingly.
I looked at my thirteen year old sister, worry spread across her face. I didn't want to lie to her. So I told her. "Nikki." I said calmly. "I've only been dieting. That's all. Even Jenny diets. I'm fine, and I'm going to stop as soon as I reach my desired weight. I promise." She looked at me with wide eyes. "Ashley no!" She reprimanded. As if I were about to do heroin or something.
I sighed. "What time is it anyway?" I demanded. "I'm so exhausted, and I know I didn't get enough sleep, and It's Saturday! Now I won't be able to accomplish a single thing all day now!" I whined dramatically. I know I sounded babyish, but I couldn't help it.
I stormed my way to the bathroom, and got caught in the mirror. I looked at my arms. They were as skinny as an eleven year olds. My face was drawn, and my eyes hollow. I barely recognized myself anymore. I pulled the scale out from the cabinet, and stepped on. "Oh my gosh!" I mouthed to myself, I had to step on it again to be sure. 88 pounds!
I suddenly felt dizzy, and my heart was racing so fast, I was sure I must be dying. I have to pull myself together, I thought frantically. I couldn't couldn't. I was dying! I was scared, I couldn't breathe. I screamed as loud as I could, then fell to the floor in a bony heep.
(to be continued)
"Why are you so skinny." She sobbed. I looked at her, not knowing what to say, my head was pounding, I felt the beginnings of a serious headache creeping up on me. "Is that why your crying?" I asked her groggily. I yawned. "Nikki, I'm not that skinny, there's no need to get all sappy about it." She looked at me angrily. "Yeah I know why your skinny. You've been starving yourself for months now Ashley!" She glared at me knowingly. I was at a loss for words. "I eat" I told her not exactly with conviction. "Where does it go Ashley? The toilet?" She asked me accusingly.
I looked at my thirteen year old sister, worry spread across her face. I didn't want to lie to her. So I told her. "Nikki." I said calmly. "I've only been dieting. That's all. Even Jenny diets. I'm fine, and I'm going to stop as soon as I reach my desired weight. I promise." She looked at me with wide eyes. "Ashley no!" She reprimanded. As if I were about to do heroin or something.
I sighed. "What time is it anyway?" I demanded. "I'm so exhausted, and I know I didn't get enough sleep, and It's Saturday! Now I won't be able to accomplish a single thing all day now!" I whined dramatically. I know I sounded babyish, but I couldn't help it.
I stormed my way to the bathroom, and got caught in the mirror. I looked at my arms. They were as skinny as an eleven year olds. My face was drawn, and my eyes hollow. I barely recognized myself anymore. I pulled the scale out from the cabinet, and stepped on. "Oh my gosh!" I mouthed to myself, I had to step on it again to be sure. 88 pounds!
I suddenly felt dizzy, and my heart was racing so fast, I was sure I must be dying. I have to pull myself together, I thought frantically. I couldn't couldn't. I was dying! I was scared, I couldn't breathe. I screamed as loud as I could, then fell to the floor in a bony heep.
(to be continued)