Shadowed

Scrambled, jostled, and confused within a mass of curving, swaying, tan, and ghost white limbs I grasp at the closest piece of stationary object I can find. I succeed in twining my fingers around what at first I take for a bus seat shoulder, only to pull myself against the chest of a thoroughly confused boy pressed against the seat of the bus.

I gape openly, the full weight of my body pressing down on him as we swing another corner. He seems older, maybe 18 or 19, most likely a senior, possibly in my classes. He’s well matured, manicured and well groomed, black hair licking just above his eye brows. He has a beautiful face, tan and well structured, the perfect set up for his dazzling hazel eyes. He is most certainly someone I would have been able to place had I seen before.

The world is on pause, a moment spared for just my sake that I am held within it’s power. I can do little more then breathe and stare into the dark emanating eyes of the boy before me. He is most obviously handsome, his lips parted just slightly, breath caught between them mid struggle. How lucky was I to not only fall onto the new kid, but to be pressed full body throttle atop his torso and staring idiotically into his perfect hazel eyes without so much as a ’hello’… Which I now realized.

“Hey,” He says, being the first to break the silence. His voice is as painfully beautiful as his appearance, wrapping itself around me. I feel my throat close. “Nice day to be tackled don’t you think.” Have I ever been this close to a boy before? Have I ever been spoken to by a boy before? How should I respond? When should I respond? How do I make a good impression? Have I always taken this long to think? Have I considered I’m still lying on top of him gaping like an idiot? I’m losing my mind.

I move much too slowly for what I realize would be appropriate, pulling my hand off his shoulder reluctantly only to make up for it by moving too fast from his body. I feel as though I am floating in a dream, trying desperately hard to gain control of my senses and calm the blood that is pouring into my head. What is happening to me? This is simply ridiculous.

The boy sits up, positioning himself beside me. I notice with a groan I’ve left a large dirt hand print on the shoulder of his shirt. I turn away, not wanting to look at him. “I couldn’t see you.” I apologize feebly. I try to envision myself as a character in my book. Vampire; tall, dark, mysterious, compelling, alluring, dangerous. A creature of the night humans only wish to obtain. He swipes a hand through his hair, brushing streaks of black from his soft face. I try desperately not to notice how brilliant he looks holding his hair back. A half smile creeps up his face, disarming despite the jovial intention.

“I was lying down. I didn’t count on being jumped.” He says. I turn back towards him slightly, trying not to be painfully aware of my grubby worn out clothes. I pretend I’m beautiful, pretend I’m witty and adorable like most girls my age.

“I didn’t count on jumping.” I say slyly. I offer my hand. “My name’s Kaylin, Kaylin Lace. I specialize in skipping school and being a klutz.” I can’t help but be a little honest, I did just sprawl myself out in front of this guy. He laughs, flashing a perfect smile.

“A pleasure Kaylin. My name’s Dari, I’m new. Just transferred in from upstate a week ago. I hope everyone in this school is as friendly as you are.” Dari takes my offered hand and places it to his lips, brushing a formal kiss across it. I stare at him in disbelief, unable to react short of the blush creeping up my face.

“Um, thanks. I don’t think you’ll have any problems making friends. As far as my school goes women tend to flock to the new guy. If you don’t mention my name you’ll do fine.” I say, taking back my hand. Dari cocks his head to the side, but makes no motion to move away. I can feel his warmth against my arm he’s so close.

“Should I be worried sharing a bus seat?” Dari says joking. I laugh, feeling more at ease.

“No, it’s more like I’m a breeding ground for suspicion. Repercussions of being smart I guess.” I say shrugging. I raise my knee to my chest, clutching at it deftly despite my attempts at being calm and collected.

“Suspicion is only the mask for jealousy.” Dari says pointedly. I look at him confused. Jealousy? Why would anyone be jealous of me? Dari smiles at me, shaking his head. Oh God is his smile beautiful. “I wouldn’t worry about it, kids will always find someone to torment, I’d say your just unlucky.” Unlucky, me? That would be the understatement of the millennia. I rearrange myself uncomfortably, hoping to change the subject.

“Um, yeah I guess so. Thanks.“ I say fidgeting with my back pack. “Ok, well um, it was nice meeting you Dari. Sorry I fell on you and all but, ugh, I’ve gotta check over some papers before class so… if you don’t mind.” I say, rescuing my back pack from it’s disregarded head in the bus isle. Dari puts his hands up innocently, leaning back against the window.

“Be my guest.” He says, making no motion to move any farther away from me. I open my bag, conscious of his gaze playing over me. I try not to enjoy his attention, to remember that in the hierarchy of my school I have no chance of winning his eye. I find it hard to recall the motions of running through the tedious number schemes chemistry requires. Under Dari’s eye it is impossible to perform the simplest of tasks. I falter at putting the finishing touches on the formulas I’ve memorized by heart, or using proper grammar in my conclusion statements. I hunch over my work protectively, willing myself to focus.

“Holey crap, you actually finished that hand out?” I jump, plucked from my own fantasies to realize Dari’s head hangs over my left shoulder. I try my mouth several times before words finally form.

“Uh, yeah. Yesterday.” I say. Dari’s face is dangerously close to mine. Long dark lashes fleck his cheeks, hazel brown centers peeking out from under them. I stare blatantly, dumbstruck by his sheer perfection. I silently hope this bus ride never ends.

Dari pulls away to fish through his own bag. He sorts through a lap top, several palm pilots, and an Ipod before finally pulling out the chemistry sheet in question. He lays his lap top across his legs like a table, splaying the papers. “You haven’t done any of it.” I point out, blinking in amazement. Dari smiles at me sidelong, and I feel my stomach turn at his glance.

“Well Ms. Over Achiever, when a paper isn’t due for a month I tend to actually wait the month.” Dari replies.

“Yeah, but if you finish it earlier Stanford’ll give you an extra test grade for being ahead of the game.” I deftly rifle through the stack of papers in my bag and pull out a syllabus. I point at the top, where, written in big bold letters is said statement. “It’s actually easier in the long run to get his crap done sooner, he only gives out one paper and if you do it early you’re more likely to remember. Then you won’t be doing homework and studying for the test at the end of the month.” Dari leans across me and points at the first question strewn across my lap.

“See this? This is the reason no one does this on time. How the hell can I even begin this equation without knowing the exact properties of oxygen? Technically this whole molecule would explode before I even began combining them. Doesn’t that make the problem null and void?” Dari says. I lean in to look over the equation with him, pressing his head against mine.

“Look here,” I say excited, “If you substitute oxygen and make it just a hydrogen combination filling out the rest of the problem is only a matter of mathematics.”

“Like that’s so easy.” Dari chuckles. I nudge him gently, smiling despite myself.

“Hey, if you had the brains to figure out that Oxygen was the problem then I’m sure you can find the intelligence to do a little math.” I say. Dari looks at me curiously. I suddenly realize how close I have become to him, our foreheads only inches from brushing one another. I blush, moving away rapidly pretending to fix my back pack.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean…” Dari begins, reaching out a hand to fix on my shoulder. Before he finishes the bus rolls to a stop and he is drown out by the clamor of students grabbing and tugging at their bags. I jump to my feet, stuffing my papers away carelessly in my haste to escape from the escalating yet awkward situation I somehow stumbled into.