Before I Wake

It was a cool, crisp afternoon, the wind tossing my hair to-an-fro as I sat on the old and worn out couch placed in Zack's garage, watching him strum his guitar gently from across me. Spring break had just begun the day before and I was finally able to relax and not worry about failing my Advanced Biology class, at least, for the moment.

I got lost in a trance as I continued watching Zack strum the strings of his guitar, allowing the waves of relaxation fall over me. Zack had always had a passion for music, as long as I've known him. He had this idea that he was going to make it big one day, and the moment that he did, he promised he would buy me the biggest sundae imaginable. I couldn't help but let out a small chuckle as I recalled the memory, wishing things were only that simple.

Zack sent me a questioning look from underneath his dark lashes, sending my heart into a flutter. "So, now she laughs at her own thoughts, interesting." He sent me a smirk as he laid his guitar down beside him, giving me his full attention. I let out a scoff as I continued picking at the edges of my floral romper, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of seeing me blush.

"Still think you're gonna make it big, Merrick?" I asked him, trying to divert the attention away from my obvious blush. He gave me a goofy grin, as he always did whenever the topic of music was brought up. "Hell yeah, and then I am going to buy you the biggest damn sundae you have ever seen!" I gave him a smile, glad to know he remembered and at the fact that my ploy to divert his attention had worked.

"What about you," he continued, punching my leg softly. "still trying to become a nurse?" I quickly punched him back, grinning in satisfaction as he grimaced. "Of course, it only seems natural, especially after what happened to my mom, yeah?" My voice getting lower.

A look of sympathy flashed over Zack's face, thinking back to that horrid memory. I hated whenever anyone would send me those looks, not truly sorry, just offering me some pity, as if that would bring my mother back. But, Zack had been there, he knew all the struggles I faced after she passed, so, those sorts of looks from him didn't seem to bother me.

My mother passed suddenly in her sleep no more than two years ago and the mention of her still sends my insides into a twisting ball of pain, though I have become an expert at hiding it. After the doctors offered us little to no answers to any of our questions, it only seemed natural that I enter the field of Biology and find out myself, no matter how much work was ahead of me.

Her death had been hard on both my father and I, being an only child and having my father suddenly become a widow, as well as a single-parent, it was no easy task. My father threw himself into his work and I had no choice but to try and move forward, with or without him. I let out a small sigh, no longer wanting to have these thoughts or try and have this conversation.

"Let's not talk about this anymore, hmm?" I stated, covering my sadness and sending Zack the best smile I could muster as I arose from his couch, all too eager to leave the suddenly constricting air inside of the garage. I didn't want to have this discussion, especially with Zack. I hated having him see me in such a weak state.

"You know you can talk to me, Alaine." I heard him mumble as he grabbed my wrist lightly, trying to get me to listen to him. I stared at the contact for a moment, surprised. Zack and I were always close, but, I was not the type of girl to let others see me cry or seem vulnerable. Zack had only seen me cry a number of cries, most being when I was much younger and over a skinned knee, and the only other instance being of course when my mother passed, though, I barely let him in, even then.

"I know, Zack." I mumbled softly, pulling my wrist from his grasp as gently as possible. I gave him a quick smile, seeing his hurt expression and ushered him out, asking for his company as I walked back to the apartment Chelsea and I shared. I heard him let out a small sigh before following me out, dropping the subject.

"You and Chelsea have any plans for tonight?" He asked as we made our way back, walking at a quick pace, eager to get me home before the sun set. "Well," I began, finding a small pebble to kick as we walked. "her and Scott spent most of the day together, so, she promised me that we would have a movie night tonight."

I saw Zack nod at the mention of Chelsea's long term boyfriend. Zack was not very fond of Scott, feeling that he had a bit of an anger issue, if you know what I mean. "They've been doing pretty well, so, don't worry." I assured, giving him a small nudge. He gave me a small smile before pulling the top of his hoodie over his head, trying to block out the cold.

The rest of the walk home was a quite one, just the both of us shuffling our way back. It was a bit of a far walk, and the cold was a bit of a pester. I preferred walking over anything else, but, it should not be this cold in Maryland during the Spring and it was a bit of a damper to the rest of my plans for break. We arrived quicker than I had wanted and I couldn't help but feel disappointed.

"So," he smirked. "your birthday is coming up in a week, you excited to be turning nineteen, you old hag?" I narrowed my eyes as he began laughing. "You're best friends with this old hag, so, shut the hell up." I countered, not wanting to think about my birthday.

He let out a chuckle before wrapping his arms around me, catching me off guard. I crashed into his chest and let out a noise of protest, though, I secretly loved the feeling of his arms around me. "I'll throw you a party, don't worry about it love. I'll even invite the guys." He smiled down at me, referring to his band mates. I couldn't help but laugh and shake my head. "Can't wait" I smiled back up at him.

With a quick kiss to my cheek, Zack was on his way, not wanting to be stuck in the cold any longer. I waved a good bye to him, watching him shuffle his way back with a heavy heart. I decided against dwelling on any more negative thoughts and made my way into the warm apartment.

I found Chelsea waiting for me, a grin on her face as she held two cups of steaming liquid. "Hey, there," she smiled, offering me a cup. I took it without hesitation and greeted her with a thankful smile. "Everything is all set up for our movie date," she fanned her arm out in proof. I followed her gaze and let out a laugh as I saw the immense amounts of pillows and blankets that were piled in the living room, as well as the large stack of romantic comedies awaiting us.

"Looks great, let me just get cleaned up right quick." I set my hot chocolate down and made my way into my bedroom. "Sure thing!" She hollered, her short frame having already made herself comfortable on the sea of blankets, her auburn hair cascading down her back.

Chelsea and I had been friends for quite some time, having met our freshman year in high school. She had always been a feisty one, not letting anyone step on her, despite her small stature. It made me love her even more and I couldn't help but stick around. She knew everything about me and stuck by me even during my worst moments. She was incredibly stubborn, a hard worker, and quite witty. We became good friends without even trying, it only seemed natural that we eventually became best friends.

I smiled at the memories as I entered my bedroom, reaching my dresser and pulling out something much warmer to wear. As I made my way into the bathroom, I was overcome with a sharp pain, similar to the one I had felt a few days before. My legs buckled beneath me and I reached for the sink counter, missing and smashing my knees into the ground with a loud thud.

"Fuck," I hissed, the sharp pain entering my knees. My head was now pounding and I had both my hands sprawled out in front of me, trying to steady myself. They began to shake and I began to breathe heavily, unable to control myself. What the fuck is happening? I've never felt this before. I thought I heard Chelsea calling out for me, but, everything had begun to become hazy and my vision was blurring around the edges.

It was then that I felt a warmth surrounding my legs, seeming to spread. I looked down in confusion, my head spinning and becoming harder to hold up. What the hell, did I soil myself? Oh, how embarrassing. As my eyes focused for a brief moment, I became aware of the fact that I had not soiled myself, but, there was a pool of red liquid seeping from my body, growing ever larger.

I furrowed my eyebrows, creating a deep crease between them. I willed my brain to catch up to what was happening. Oh, my god. I screamed internally, my eyes widening at the realization. I was covered in blood. It was everywhere and it didn't seem to be stopping. "Chelsea!" I screamed, trying to scramble away from the pool of red liquid.

"Chelsea, get the fuck in here!" I screamed once more, my voice breaking. Tears were flowing down my face faster than I ever thought possible as I continued to try and stand, willing myself to get away from this disaster. I let out a sob as my body gave out on me, sending me crashing toward the floor once more.

"What do you-" a sharp gasp escaped Chelsea's mouth as she looked down in horror. "Oh, my fucking god, Alaine!" She scrambled toward me as my vision began to black, sending me tumbling down into the depths of my own mind. I felt her warm hands on my head, checking for some sort of fever. She quickly made her way out of the bathroom, screaming something about an ambulance. I wasn't sure. I wasn't sure of anything anymore as my vision went completely black and my body fell numb.