I'm Sorry

“Alright, see you later!” Avery shouted at Blake, waving, his backpack hanging off of his shoulder. Mitchell hadn’t been at school that day, which wasn’t unusual. He skipped out every year on Valentine’s Day. But last year he came to walk Avery home. Avery had even bought chocolate, just like last year.

Avery jumped slightly as his phone vibrated in his pocket. He pulled it out smiling and he typed in his passcode frowning. At the end of the message, tears were starting to form in his eyes.

From: Mitchell
Hey Avery. This relationship isn’t working for me anymore. I’ve found someone else and she’s everything that I really want. Don’t bother texting or calling me. Bye.

Avery choked a little bit, before the tears started dripping from his eyes. He put his phone in his pocket and stood still for a moment before he took off towards the forest. He’d been running for about two minutes when he reached the tree line.

Avery walked forwards into the trees and stumbled, falling to the ground on his knees, his feet on either side of him. He was shaking and sobbing as he pulled off his sweater. He looked at his arms that were covered in scars. ‘I haven’t cut since Mitchell and I got together,’ he thought and that made him cry harder. He pulled his wallet out of his back pocket and opened it, feeling around in the pockets, when something pricked his finger.

He pulled the sharp object out and stared at it. ‘I’m worthless anyway. Nobody wants me around, so why not just end it all now?’ And with that thought, he dug the blade in and dragged it across his skin, cutting it. He let out a sigh and did it again, digging the razor a little bit deeper every time he made a cut.

After about 5 minutes, blood was pooling around him, staining the grass and his clothes.

Someone dropped to the ground beside him and grabbed his wrist gently, stopping Avery from cutting again. Avery looked up and saw Blake’s dark brown eyes staring into his yellow-green ones.

“Why?” Blake asked as he took the razor from Avery’s hand, putting it into his jeans’ front pocket. He took off his sweater and put it on Avery’s bleeding arm.

“Because nobody cares about me anymore. Mitchell found someone new, my mom doesn’t care about me, because I’m gay and my dad left because he thought I was a disgrace to the family and he didn’t want to be associated with me. Nobody cares about me,” Avery let out a cry and curled up to Blake, who wrapped his arms around the smaller boy.

“Come on Avery, I care about you,” Blake whispered and Avery scoffed a little bit.

“You’re just saying that,” Avery murmured back, his voice breaking in places and Blake side, shaking his head.

“No, I’m not ‘just saying that’ Avery. I really do care about you,” Blake said again and Avery looked up, his eyes red and his eyeliner running down his face.

“Really?” Avery asked. Blake nodded, smiling and Avery smiled back. Blake let go of Avery and stood up suddenly. Avery gave him a funny look and Blake extended his hand.

“Come on, let’s go to my house and get you cleaned up and bandaged,” Blake said softly and Avery tensed, looking up at Blake, unsure.

“But what about Mitchell?” Avery asked and Blake shrugged.

“Just avoid him. He can’t hurt you if I’m around,” Blake reassured and Avery nodded, taking Blake’s hand and letting Blake pull him up. Avery staggered, feeling a little light-headed and Blake wrapped an arm around Avery to steady him.

It took them a couple of minutes of careful maneuvering but eventually they made it to Blake’s house.

“Well, we’re here,” Blake said and Avery nodded.

“I can see that,” he murmured and frowned, remembering the last time he was here, with Mitchell.

As they were walking up the pathway to the front door, Mitchell and his new girlfriend came out. Avery froze and he and Mitchell made eye contact before Avery looked at the ground. Mitchell and his girlfriend walked down the front steps awkwardly and went around the house, to the backyard. Avery looked at Blake and he just shook his head, grabbing Avery’s hand lightly and pulling him to the front door.

Once they were inside, Blake grabbed Avery’s hand again and he dragged him to the second floor bathroom. Blake helped Avery wash and bandage his arm, before he pushed him lightly onto the toilet seat.

“Stay here. I’ll be right back,” Blake told Avery and left the bathroom. Avery sat there, staring at the white bandages that covered his right arm. He was about it pick at it, and try to see under it when there was a knock at the bathroom door. He got up and walked to the door with caution. He opened the door and saw Mitchell standing there, his hand raised as if to knock again.

“Oh, uh…” Avery trailed off and walked around Mitchell who walked into the bathroom. Avery let out a sigh and looked at the closed door and slid down the wall next to the bathroom, a single tear sliding down his face. He saw Blake coming and quickly wiped his cheek, standing back up.

“Avery? What are you doing out here?” Blake asked, tilting his head to the side.

“Mitchell came and –” he cut himself off and just pointed to the bathroom door. Blake nodded in understanding, and grabbed Avery’s hand again, dragging him to his room.

“You can borrow a shirt, some shorts and one of my sweaters,” Blake said and left the room, leaving the clothes on the bed. Avery took his clothes off slowly and put the other clothes on. He walked up to the full length mirror and took himself in, frowning. ‘I’m fat, and these clothes make me look like I’m even fatter,’ he thought while poking his stomach, before turning and looking at the window. ‘Would it just be easier to jump?’ he thought, and took a couple of steps towards the window before stopping. ‘Blake said he cared, remember that Avery. Remember Blake,’ his mind reminded him, but Avery shook his head and opened the window, climbing onto the window sill, looking down into the backyard, at the concrete below him.

Mitchell, who had seen Avery get onto the window sill, ran inside and up the stairs, coming down the hallway to Blake’s room, intending on charging right past Blake.

“Mitchell, you can’t go –” Mitchell walked right past Blake and opened the door.

“Avery! Get from there!” Mitchell yelled and Avery flinched, before looking behind him at Mitchell. ‘He only wants you to get down from there because he wants to hurt you some more. Just jump, then all of your problems will be over. Jump Avery,’ his mind whispered at him, so Avery shrugged.

“Okay,” and then he saw Blake. His eyes started watering at the sight of Blake’s tears.

“Don’t do it Avery, please,” Blake whispered.

“I’m sorry,” Avery told him, before pushing himself out of the window and falling to the concrete, dying as soon as he hit the ground.