Silent Restraint

Dean sat down with a soft grunt and waved the bar tender for a beer. When the man dropped off his beer, he asked for a shot also. Dean nursed his beer for a few minutes before taking the shot. He set the small glass back down and reveled in the warmth at the back of his throat. 

On his second beer, others started arriving in the bar. For a while he had been one of only a couple, but now the tables were starting to fill. Music was being played, cigarettes were being lit, and the bartender had begun using his tiny umbrellas. 

He ignored it, though, lost in his own world. By his third beer and second shot, he barely even noticed the crowd. 

"Jimmy?"

Dean heard it, but didn't respond. He wasn't used to it. Not anymore. 

"Jimmy!"

He threw back another shot as a body brushed up close to his. 

"Dean!"

Now he looked. Dex was standing over him with a big sloppy grin on her face, no doubt already buzzed. She said his name again with a grin and wrapped him in a one-armed hug that he was forced to return. 

"What are you doing here?" he asked over the music. 

"I'm a groupie now! We're on our way to San Francisco and stopped here for the night. God what has it been, like five years? Are you working?"

"No- I mean I was." He was suddenly aware of the man hanging on her left arm. He wasn't paying attention to them. "Who's this?" he asked. 

"Oh, shit I'm so rude. This is Matt-- Matt come here. This is Matt Webb. He's in a band," She grinned winking. "Matty, this is Jimmy, the guy I told you about."

Matt reached out to shake Dean's hand, and Dean quietly told him his real name. Dex scoffed and made a face at him. "Ugh Jimmy you ruin everything." She turned back to Matt. "Hey I'll meet you over with Josh, I wanna talk to Dean."

He kissed her on the cheek and said goodbye to Dean, then walked away. 

"Your new boy toy?" Dean smirked. 

She grinned. "I told you, I'm a groupie now. He's a guitarist." She put a hand on his arm and pulled him off of his stool. "Let's go talk."

"What about your guitarist?"

"Aww, he'll be fine without me," she said, slipping her arm through his. 

They sat down in a booth and, after minimal insistence from Dean, Dex filled him in on her adventures. When they parted ways, after she left her parents and after he dropped her off in New York, she headed up North to Toronto, where she met Matt. She told him about some of the more exciting concerts, and explained her duties as a groupie, all of which only convinced him that he needed to join a band. 

She talked about her 'promotion' from groupie to merch manager when their last one quit, and how all she really had to do was wear barely anything and she could sell just about the whole stock for the night. The band manager said she was the best addition to the band since the lead singer. She also talked about the rise and fall of a coke habit and showed him her sobriety chip. She told him how she had looked for him, on the road with the band. At one point she even tried tracking possible cases in towns she knew she was going to be in, but nothing turned up. 

By the time she was done with her tale, her friends were looking like they wanted to clear out, so she went and told Matt to leave without her, that she would see them in the morning. Matt locked eyes with Dean and made a show of sticking his tongue down her throat. Dex returned to the table, hoping he didn't see that. She didn't know if it was because she didn't want him to think she was easy, or because she was ready to let him into her bed; she ultimately decided it was a little bit of both. 

"So I've told you, now you tell me: what are you doing in the sunny hellhole that is Arizona?"

"I'm actually on my way to see Reagan. She's getting married."

Dex raised her eyebrows. "Wow, to who? Oh god please don't say you."

He chuckled and shook his head. "Naw, I ain't the marrying type. She's marrying Foster's boyfriend's brother," he said putting slight emphasis on the 'boy' in boyfriend. 

"Wait, say that again?" she smiled. "Foster was gay?"

"Apparently," he shrugged. 

"How did you find out?"

"Uh, I guess he only told Hayden. And his boyfriend obviously, but Hayden told us after he died."

"No shit." Dean nodded and smiled at her. "Okay so what about you and Sam and the girls?"

"Sam's got a kid--"

"What the fuck all the good stuff happens after I leave," she pouted. "What's its name?"

"Her name is Mary."

"Oh god thats the cutest thing I've ever heard. I thought she couldn't have kids though? That shit she was on made her infertile or something."

Dean shrugged. "I guess it took."

Dex carried on about how cute it was that Sam had a daughter but she slowed to a stop when a shadow crossed over his face. "What's up with you, sourpuss?"

"She thinks she's dying."

"Amare?"

"Yeah. She says she can feel it, she can feel it in her and Perenna. Sam can feel it too. But no one's talking about it. I think it's the stuff. It used up all her life trying to heal her from what the vampires did to her."

"So what are you gonna do?"

Dean shook his head. "What I always do." He sipped his beer and said, "Take care of Sammy."

She watched him with a sad look on her face and he wanted to snap her out of it; so he did something without really thinking about it. He invited her back to his motel room. Dex, of course, accepted, and followed him out to the Impala. She sighed, running he hand along the shiny black exterior. 

"I didn't know how much I missed her," she said quietly. Then she rumbled to life and Dex thought her ovaries might explode, so she got in the car hoping somehow the new position of her torso would save her from a severe body malfunction. 

She asked if she could use his shower when they got there, and he briefly considered trying the Naked Man just for kicks. He decided against full Naked Man and settled for taking his shirt and boots off, wondering when was the last time he actually tried to flatter a girl into bed. Usually they threw themselves at him. Or he just asked politely. He didn't usually have to work for it. 

Dex came out sooner than he expected and she frowned at him. 

"What?" he asked. 

"Well if you're gonna go halfway, you might as well go for the full Naked Man."

Dean chuckled and ran a hand over his face. When he opened his eyes, she was right there. Warm, wet body in nothing but a towel, smiling mischievously up at him, before putting a hand on the back of his neck and kissing him. It wasn't a long kiss, but it was hot and it got the point across. When they broke apart, she kept her eyes closed for a second before smiling and licking her lips sensually. She kissed him again, this time dragging it out. He put his hands on her waist and she moved to put both hands on his neck. 

She pulled away with a little sigh and smiled. "I have literally been waiting years for that," she laughed. 

"Shit, Dex, you coulda told me," he responded with his own small smile. 

"Well now you know, so do something about it," she challenged, the corners of her mouth curling into a smirk. 

Dean leaned in, his teeth grazing his bottom lip. Her eyes fell shut. He put a hand on her cheek, sliding it back to tangle in her hair, and he kissed the corner of her mouth lightly. He nipped her bottom lip, and then pecked her lips. A soft release of air slipped through her mouth as he pulled away. He frowned. 

"You're drunk," he said, his voice gruff. 

"I'm buzzed," she replied, her eyes still closed. "Not even slurring yet."

"You have a boyfriend."

"So?" She looked at him through heavy lashes. "It isn't like he hasn't done it before."

"So I'm not gonna be payback. I'm not gonna fuck you to get back at your boy toy."

She took a step back and frowned at him, annoyed. "Is that what you think this is? I'm not some petty bitch, Dean. Just so you know, I've wanted to jump your fine ass since the moment I saw you. I'm not trying to get back at some guy who has 'unfaithful' written in his job description." She paused and then her lips broke apart in a small, mischievous smile; she couldn't hold on to her anger with his naked torso in front of her. 

Dean looked at her for a split second before acting on impulse. He closed the small gap between them in one step and pressed his mouth against hers. He tangled his fingers in her hair and her hands played with his belt and ran up over his chest and stomach. He pushed his hand through the fold in her towel to cup her hip and expose her soft flesh. 

Dex decided to stop wasting time, gripping his belt loops with her fingers and yanking his jeans and boxers off. The shuffle to the bed helped with getting them the rest of the way off, and then there was only the thin, cheap terrycloth of her towel separating them. His hands, both of which were now resting on her hips, moved down and grabbed her ass, pulling her up to wrap her legs around his waist. 

She leaned back and flashed a grin, and then he threw her on the bed. 

<><><><><>

The next morning, Dex had her new happy world tied up and drained of life. When she woke up, legs and fingers intertwined with the man next to her, she felt so ecstatic she thought she could die in that second and it would be alright. His breath warmed her face and she ran her fingers up his forearm and shoulder to the baby hairs on the back of his neck. He propped himself up on an elbow and leaned over her; she rolled on her back to accommodate the shift. 

"I have to leave," he said quietly. 

"So do I," she replied, a pout turning her lips. He kissed her and she smiled again. "When will I see you next?" she asked. He didn't reply and she narrowed her eyes. "What?"

"Nothing." He moved like he was going to get out of bed and she stopped him with a hand on his arm. 

"Tell me."

Dean sighed and ran hand over his face. "I'm not real."

Dex snorted and rolled her eyes. "Okay then Dream Dean, what was last night?"

"Exactly what you wanted it to be," he said sadly. 

"Haha yeah fuck you," she scoffed with no humor. She rolled out of bed and started getting dressed. 

"Dex you gotta listen to me." She paused but didn't look at him.  "Remember how you said you were looking for a case to find me? Well you found one, except I'm not coming. You're on your own and you're dying."

"I feel like I'd know if I was dying," she said pulling her shirt on.

"It's a djinn," Dean insisted. "This is your dream."

She crossed her arms. "I'm not supposed to know I'm in a dream, that's the whole point. I did my research, Asshole. And I took precautions. I told Matty to call you if I went missing for too long. Do you think I'm an idiot?" He didn't acknowledge her, just got out of bed. 

"Dex, please. In your dream, I'm your hero. I save you every time. So here I am, now wake up."

"This isn't a dream-"

"Wake up."

"Dean, no-"

"Wake Up."

"Please it can't be-"

"Wake Up!"

"I don't want this to be over-"

"WAKE UP!"

<><><><><>

Pain. And cold. That was all she felt. Her tongue weighed at least thirty pounds, and her eyelids twice that. 

"Dex," a voice said in her ear. "Wake up Sweetheart, come on, wake up Dex."

She didn't move, so it was said again. "Wake up! Cmon Dex, wake up. Please."

He kept saying it to her, his voice getting equally more desperate and hopeless, when she coughed and was able to talk. Her eyes didn't open and her voice sounded like she'd smoked as many cigarettes as she tried to convince people she did, but it happened and that was all that counted to either of them. She said, "You lied."

"What?" Disbelief echoed through his words. 

"You lied. You told... me that you-" she coughed "-you said you weren't coming this time."

"Sonuvabitch Dex what-"

"You told me. Why are you here?"

He stuttered a bit, trying to make sense of what she was saying, and then, "Let's get you out of here."