Stay Gold

It was quiet night without the boys tearing up the house. It was just Darry and I. He was a little confused why I’d rather stay home on a Friday night then go out with everyone and have a good time. I hated crowds, to be honest. I was never around big groups of people, other than at school. I didn’t have friends to buddy around with, or to bring to my house -- in fear that they’d witness Daddy do something to me, then have the fuzz show up at our house and take me away to a girls home. I hear plenty of bad things about girls and boys home, but I doubt they were worse than my own home. I was lucky, though. If I would have hung around that old house any longer, I might not be here today. Sometimes, you just had to think about the good things in life, not just the bad. And trust me -- there was a lot of bad in my life, however it dulled down a smidgen once I moved here.

“You sure you’re okay, Elaine?” Darry asked, cocking an eyebrow.

“I’m tired,” I shrugged, “I guess I’m fine.” I was telling the truth, I was tired. I had a long day. A long, hectic day. Wasn’t in the mood to get blitzed or fight anybody or watch the boys be idiots. I’d save that last part for a different day. I glanced over at the clock.

“Only 10:30?” I thought to myself. I was either completely bored, or I was getting old. An (almost) seventeen year old should not be this exhausted this early. Yet, I was. Darry was still reading his paper. This was his idea of fun. Sad to say, my idea of fun as well.

“I think I’m gonna drag myself to bed. I ain’t feelin’ so hot,” I said, struggling to get up. My feet literally felt like 200-pound weights. I was so happy when I finally reached my room. Well, our room. I now shared a room with Pony and Soda because when I was hurt real bad, I could hardly do anything on my own. So, Darry let me stay in their room with them. It wasn’t like we were gonna do anything, and he knew that. I didn’t mind sharing a room with the boys, except that the three of us shared a bed so it got a little cramped sometimes. I liked it though, made me feel secure.

Safe. At least for a little bit.

“You think you can get away from me, you ungrateful bitch?” I tried running away, but he grabbed me. “How dare you defy your father like that!” A hand was raised, I was shaking.

“Daddy, no!”

Backhanded.

Punched.

Repeat.

I begged and pleaded for him to stop. But he kept going, and going, and going.

“I’m gonna make sure you respect me, little girl.” He ripped my pants off, started inserting different things into me. I screamed bloody murder, but that seemed to excite him more.

Harder.

Faster.

Longer.

I tried everything to get him off of me, nothing seemed to help. He had that wicked look in his eye, holding a blade near my neck.

“You will respect me.”

I wake up -- screaming, crying, cussing at something that wasn’t there. I ran out of the bedroom like a bat out of hell, collapsing near the front door.

“Oh my god,” I cried out, “stop, stop!”

“Elaine!” Ponyboy’s drunken voice filled my head. “Elaine, stop screaming! You’re fine, baby girl.” Sodapop and Darry ran into the living room, like Ponyboy did. I’m curled up in a ball, head between my knees, refusing to look up.

“Don’t let him get me...” I whispered, “I don’t wanna die...”

“What the fuck is going on here?” Darry demanded. His voice shook the whole house, even more than my shrieking.

“She’s spooked,” Ponyboy mumbled.

“I think she had a nightmare,” Sodapop added. Both of the boys had their arms around me. The way I was shakin’, you might’ve thought I had Parkinson’s, or something.

“Shhhh,” Ponyboy slurred, “you’re fine, everything is fine. Your old m-man ain’t ever gonna get’cha.” I could barely understand what he was saying, but I knew he was trying to comfort me. I finally had the cuts to look up.

Darry looked angry, Ponyboy looked drunk, Sodapop was just...Sodapop. He looked awfully tired, though.

“So you’re not being killed?” Darry asked, trying to laugh. I looked at my arms, legs, everything; Making sure I was still in one piece.

“I think I’m fine,” I paused, “let’s go back to bed.”

Soda carried me back to the bedroom, making sure I didn’t fall if I tried to walk. I didn’t know where Pony went, but I could hear him vomiting somewhere close. Soon enough, he came into the room as well and we all lay in our bed. The boys put their arms around me, cooing me -- telling me everything was gonna be okay. I curled up next to them and soon drifted off to sleep again.

* * * *

Shockingly, I slept like a baby after my night terror. I slept wonderfully, in fact. I had been awake for a little while, but didn’t have the energy to open my eyes. When I did, however, I nearly had a stroke. Ponyboy was right in my face, only inches away.

“Happy birthday!” He shouted. I was surprised he was up this early, especially for him drinking so much last night.

“What the hell, man?” I groaned, throwing a pillow over my head, “Why are you up this early?”

He pulled the pillow off of me, I immediate reaction was to pull the blanket way over my head.

“It’s 12:30 in the afternoon, Elaine.”

I sprung up like a piece of toast coming out of the toaster, “Why’d you let me sleep so late?”

“You look like you needed it after what happened last night.”

“So what if I woke up screaming? You look like you needed sleep more than I did.”

“I’m fine.”

“So am I.”

“Why were you screaming last night? Did you have another dream about your old man again?”

I sighed, nodding slowly. “I dreamt that he found me with the gang, and that he was about to off me, like he did to my momma.”

Ponyboy pulled me into a hug, “It was only a dream, El, you don’t have to worry.”

“I know,” I began, “still spooked the shit outta me.”

Ponyboy was still hugging me. I looked up at him and smiled, “Thanks for everything. You have no idea how grateful I am to have you, Soda and Darry.”

“Enough of that talk,” Pony said, getting up from the bed, “we have a birthday to celebrate. What do you wanna do today?” He looked overly eager, like he knew my birthday bothered me. I guess I’d try to cheer up, just to make him and everybody else happy. “We can do anything you want,” he added.

“Surprise me,” I said with a smile. We walked out of the room together. Sodapop was out on the porch, Darry was in the kitchen cooking something.

“Happy birthday, kid,” Darry called out, “what do ya’ll have planned for the day?”

“I don’t know...” I paused, glancing over at Ponyboy who was on the front porch smoking a cigarette, “I told Pony to surprise me -- now that I think of it, I don’t think that was a smart decision.”

“The boy never uses his head in these situations, yet he has all A’s in school.”

“I don’t want him doin’ somethin’ stupid for me. I may just have to sock him in the face.” Ponyboy felt like the brother I never had. Actually, all the boys felt like brothers to me. I was just the shy middle sister. “I sure hope he don’t bring that Dallas Winston around the house today...on my day.”

Darry cocked an eyebrow, “Ol’ Dally messin’ with you?”

“Not anymore,” I began, “I’d just...I’m not sure, actually. He’s...interesting.”

“Kid’s tough is nails. He’s arrogant, an asshole, not motivated to do anything school-wise. Definitely Pony’s friend,” Darry joked. He was right though, he did fit in with the rest of the guys. Every greaser, really. I was the one that didn’t fit in.

I plopped myself on the couch, snagging one of Pony’s cigarettes and lighting it up. To my surprise, when Pony walked in the door, Two-Bit was following right behind him.

“Happy birthday, Shortstack!” Two-Bit grinned, running over to me and messing up my hair, as if it wasn’t already messed up enough. “Hope you don’t have plans tonight, because we’re all goin’ out! After your party, of course.” Two-Bit had that goofy look of his on his face. I glared at Ponyboy, and then at Sodapop.

“What happened to no party?” I snapped, “You know I hate m-”

“Just hear us out on this one. It’s not even a party, really. Please, Elaine, it’s not that bad, I promise,” Pony said, looking hopeful. Too hopeful.

“Speaking of party,” Darry cut in, “this is for you,” He said, handing me a ten dollar bill. “I know it ain’t much, but I figure you could use it. Happy birthday,” He said smiling. The rest of that day was filled with gifts. A pack of smokes from Johnny, a switchblade from Soda and Two-Bit, and the best gift of all from Ponyboy -- A Robert Frost poem book. The rest of the afternoon was filled with food, and watching the boys play football. The gang was all here. Ponyboy, Johnny, Soda, Steve and Two-Bit. Minus Dallas Winston, thankfully.

I took today as an opportunity to get dolled up for the first time in my life. I mean, I was goin’ out for the first time for my birthday, so why not? I wore a tight black skirt that came hugged my hips, but came to my knees, a dark green tank top, and Ponyboy’s sweatshirt. I did my makeup for the first time, wearing the dark eyeliner and red lipstick. I took a good look in the mirror, still not believing the reflection.

Nervously, I stepped out of the bathroom.

“Well, guys, what do you think?” They stared at me, jaws hitting the floor. From the looks on their faces, you’d think that they’ve never seen a woman before.

“Elaine Williams,” Two-Bit began, “you are one of the finest lookin’ women I’ve ever laid eye on.” There goes Two-Bit giving his two-bits on my appearance.

“You look tuff,” Pony said, laughing.

“Cute,” Soda said, smiling.

I felt myself starting to blush with all the sudden compliments. I was painted up like trash, but I couldn’t say I didn’t like it. I never got attention like that from boys. I felt...wanted.

“We better get goin’,” Ponyboy announced, “gotta get to the drive-in before the socs’ start fuckin’ with us. Especially Elaine.”

“Why we goin’ there? Weren’t ya’ll just there last night?”

“We’re goin’ to meet Dal there,” Johnny spoke out. And there went my whole mood for the night. I’d rather have that soc that tried running off with me be there, than have to see Dally. That was the honest to god truth.

“Dally won’t mess with you,” Two-Bit said, “we’ll put him into his place if he tries anything.”

I sighed, and followed everybody out the door. We walked the five-minute walk from our house, over to the drive-in, soon having to wait at the front for Dally. As if him showing up wasn’t bad enough, we had to wait for him, too. This boy sure did know how to push my buttons, but maybe I was letting him.

“Elaine,” Soda said walking over to me, “this is Sandy, my girlfriend.” I had seen her before. She was small, pretty, with blondish hair, somewhat like Soda’s. He had definitely got himself a good girl. She smiled, “Sodapop talks about you a lot. Socs’ give you any problems since you’ve been in town?”

“A car full of ‘em jumped Johnny and I, one of them nearly dragging me to their car,” I paused, “if it wasn’t for Dally scarin’ them douche bags off, I could’ve been a goner.”

“Dally scarin’ who off?” A familiar voice asked, “What’s up, Sandy? Who’s your friend?” Dally asked. He must have not realized that Sandy was talking to me. I think I was actually kind of happy that he didn’t notice me. She rolled her eyes, “Dally, do you have to flirt with every girl you see? Jeez. This is Elaine. Have you two not met?”

There we go, I was done. I sighed and turned around. Dally did a double take and rubbed his eyes, jaw dropping. I swore that it literally hit the ground.

“What the fuck?” He said, sounding surprised, “You’re actually pretty cute when you’re all painted up,” He laughed.

I smiled, “Oh, you’re still an asshole, I see. Nice to see you too, Dal.”

“Dally didn’t mean what he said. He meant that you look tuff, is all,” Sandy translated, with a smile. I may have looked like a greaser on the outside, but I still had so much to learn...I hated it.

We all started to walk further into town. From the sounds of everyone talking, we were about to party pretty hard. Dally stayed close to me on the walk. The two of us were in the very back together, and I was a little scared by it, wondering what he was going to try. At the same time, though, I didn’t mind. I was starting to enjoy his company, and his good looks. I couldn’t believe I found Dallas Winston of all people, attractive. I wasn’t even boozed up either. Not yet, of course.

“I was thinkin’,” He began, “you wanna ditch everyone for a bit and get a few drinks?”

I raised an eyebrow at him, “I don’t want any funny business, Dallas Winston. I don’t trust ya.”

“You don’t have to worry about me trying to rip off your pants. I just thought I’d try to be a nice guy and take you out for your birthday. I know a bar where we can get into and everyth-”

“The last time I had a drink with you, you told everybody that I was a sleep around. What makes you think I ever want to go anywhere with you?” I snapped, stopping mid-walk.

“Because I’m ready for a drink, and because I’m paying for you. Now let’s go,” He said firmly. “I swear on Johnny’s life I won’t try nothin’.”

I still didn’t trust Dallas, but at the same time, I didn’t stray away from him. “You try anything funny with me, and I’ll gut you like a fish. Ya hear me?”

“Relax, girl. You’re alright.”

Upon meeting Dallas Winston, I would have never even thought I’d be friends with him, let alone go drink with him. Until now, fleeing the state was the ballsiest thing I've ever done. This, however, might have brought it to a whole different level.