New Image, New Decisions, New Life

Gerard rolled over in his bed, black hair messy against the cream sheets. Although the slow rate of Frank's breathing kept him calm, Gerard was too distressed to sleep. All he could do was gaze at Frank with only the soft moonlight to help him see the outline of his sleeping form.

Frank woke up suddenly because of Gerard tossing and turning in bed. "Everything okay?" he asked Gerard, extending his arm to move the long black hair from his eyes.

"I'm fine," Gerard sighed. "Just thinkin," he added, as he rolled again onto his back to face the ceiling, looking over the bumps and swirls that were there.

"If you need anything, just let me know, okay?" Frank offered. He then leaned over to kiss Gerard's cheek and then laid on his back once more, mirroring Gerard's position.

"Okay sweetie," Gerard replied. He sighed once more before running his hands down his face and resting them on his chest. "I just can't stop thinking about what Mikey said. Y'know, about me being... destined to fall off the wagon again?"

"I don't believe that though. Mikey's wrong." Frank didn't know how to make Gerard feel better about this subject.

Gerard went on, "I mean, I'll slip up sooner or later. I know I will. It's just waiting to happen," Gerard mumbled as he turned on his side away from Frank.

Frank slid closer to Gerard and slipped an arm around his waist. Placing a kiss to his neck, Frank whispered in his ear, "I believe in you. We can make it through this... together."

"Thanks," Gerard mumbled as he pushed back into Frank's embrace. "It's one of the reasons I love you, you know," Gerard mentioned, looking over his shoulder at Frank. "I love you because you're like this, so supportive."

"I love you because you're a strong person and whenever you set your mind to something, you can achieve it. I love you because you're everything to me," Frank said.

"And you're everything to me, too." Gerard snuggled closer to Frank. "I can sleep now, I think," Gerard added sleepily.

"Good, get some rest. We can figure this out in the morning," Frank whispered. When he replayed this conversation in his head, his heart broke when he realized that Gerard didn't believe in himself.

When the soft morning light bled in through the window, Gerard released himself from the sleeping Frank's grip and made his way to the bathroom. Once in the en suite, Gerard leaned against the counter and stared at himself in the mirror, picking out the flaws.

Frank woke up again when he felt Gerard pull away from his body and he heard the bed creak. Frank opened his eyes and saw Gerard just as he was closing the door to the bathroom. He was just going to wait until Gerard got out of the bathroom to get out of bed.

Gerard sighed at the reflection before him. Growing frustrated, he pulled open one of the drawers in front of him and rooted around looking for a pair of scissors. After taking a moment to find them, Gerard took them out of the drawer, shut it, then took a deep breath before he started to hack off chunks of his long hair.

After about fifteen minutes, and Frank not hearing anything going on in the en suite, no shower, no water running, he began to wonder what was going on. He quietly got out of bed and made his way over to the bathroom door. Taking a deep breath, he knocked lightly and asked through the wood, "Everything okay in there? You've been in there for a while..."

"Fuck," Gerard muttered after he cut his fingers which held the hair he intended to chop off. "I'm fine, Frank," he called, eyes rolling at the over protective boyfriend he had. Gerard ran a hand through his now short black hair and smiled at himself in the mirror. He put the scissors back in the drawer and swept up all the hair he could see and put the black strands in the small wastebasket which was tucked in the corner of the room.

"Well, do you want any coffee? I can put on a pot if you want..." Frank asked, and looked down at his feet and the light spilling out from underneath the door.

"I said I'm fine, Frank," Gerard repeated. Once all the hair was cleaned up, Gerard opened the cupboard door of the counter and searched in the back for the hidden bleach to dye his hair with.

"Okay..." Frank said, slightly confused. He turned away from the door and went out into the main part of the apartment. He decided to put on a pot of coffee anyway, and then started straightening up the kitchen. Seeing nothing else that interested him in there, he wandered around the small apartment and just waited for Gerard to come out.

After Gerard rinsed his hair for the final time and dried it, he looked at his new reflection. The white hair shined under the bright light from the window and it made Gerard smile, just as every new hair style did.

Frank was starting to get restless. What in the world could Gerard be doing in there?

Being as quiet as he could, Gerard snuck out of the en suite and made his way to the bed and hid himself under the covers. He couldn't wait to see Frank's reaction to his new hair.

Frank finally wandered into the bedroom again and found Gerard there, under the covers. He was confused and walked around to his side of the bed. He pulled the covers back to get in with Gerard, and then he saw him.

Gerard grinned up at him, face beaming. "Whaddya think?" he asked as if he was a small child.

Frank's jaw fell and he stared at his boyfriend in shock.. "Oh my god," he whispered. He stumbled into bed and touched Gerard's new hair, as he tried to process the change in his mind. "It's... different...," he finally said.

"I dreamed about it, so it happened," Gerard smiled, and looked up at Frank.

Still in shock, Frank only whispered, "Wow." When his state of shock finally passed, he pulled Gerard closer and into a kiss. "You look amazing," Frank said with a smile.

"Thank you very much." Gerard nodded, looking proud. "You see, the hairstyle came with an idea I thought of."

"Yeah? And what's that?"

"Proposing." Gerard smiled as he responded quietly, and gazed up at Frank adoringly.

Frank's heart sped up drastically when he heard that word. He smiled back at Gerard and just stared at the face of the man he loved. "Really?" he managed to ask.

"Yeah," Gerard nodded. "And I'm wondering, like with my hair, if I should follow what my dream suggested."

Frank's heart was going to burst if Gerard kept this up. "I think so..."

"Hmmm, maybe." Gerard grinned, cheekily, as he rolled over onto Frank's side of the bed.

Frank laughed, "What are you doing?"

"Contemplating my decision, of course," Gerard sang back to Frank as he hid under the covers, his eyes just peeking out of the top.

"Oh, interesting. Let me know when you've made up your mind," Frank smirked. In the meantime, Frank swooped down for another kiss from Gerard.

After a few moments, Gerard looked up from the covers. "Frank? Can I ask you something?" Gerard half smiled up at his boyfriend.

"Of course. Anything." Frank grinned.

"Will you marry me?" Gerard mumbled quietly into his hands, while holding the covers up to his face.

Frank moved Gerard's hands and pulled the covers off his face.
He looked into Gerard's hazel eyes and said, "Absolutely."

"Even though I'm going to attack you right now with kisses?" Gerard giggled before he pulled Frank down on top of him, and made feverish attempts to kiss him, usually missing and kissing his nose instead.

"Yes," he said to Gerard, in between the little kisses he was receiving. Finally, Frank took Gerard's face in his hands and kissed him, deep and slow, sealing the deal. "I love you."

"I love you too." Gerard smiled softly as he wound his fingers in Frank's hair. "Forever," he added.