I'm Not The Same Boy You Knew Back Then

The sound of the small bell dinging above the door caused Matt to glance up from drying mugs with a towel. He smiled softly. "Morning, Alex."

"Morning Matt. How was your 'hot date' last night?" Alex replied, slight hint of jealousy in his voice. Obviously, that was a bad topic to bring up, as Matt's eyes lit up with joy from behind the counter, Alex mentally preparing himself for an hour of listening all about his friend being fucked.

"Oh, Alex, it was amazing. It was so romantic and Zack had laid out rose petals in a pathway up to our bedroom… And sorry for not coming home last night."

Alex sighed, tying his apron strings in a bow behind his back. "It's fine. The apartment was freezing anyway - I couldn't bring myself to put the heating on."

Matthew Flyzik was Alex's best friend. They'd met about a year ago after Mark had taken Alex to the coffee shop where he worked. Alex and Matt hit it off straight away, and Alex took Mark's place at the cafe after he'd left to pursue his music career with his friends Travis and Tom. He had to sell the shelter, meaning Alex had no where to go, which is when Matt took him in.

"Oh, Alex. You can put the heating on, you know. It's november. We're not that hard up for cash."

"But I feel bad, Matt. We need the money. We've both just got crappy jobs here that barely pay anything."

Matt flicked the switches at the back of the coffee machines. It was around 7am, so they would be opening for the day soon. "Yeah but I'm at college, and I'm helping you still with your studies. Alex, we can do this. We're not just limited to this small area of Baltimore, y'know. It's just a shame most the money I had saved went to pay for college."

As soon as Alex had become friends with Matt, Matt would spend hours with the younger boy teaching him anything he could - mainly the basics like maths and english, but Alex's passion was music, and music theory just so happened to be one of Matt's strong points.

"I don't understand how you can be so positive, Matt."

Matt walked up to the door of the cafe and turned the sign around to say 'open'. "I don't understand how you can be so negative, Alex."

~*~

The main coffee shop lunch rush hour had ended about 20 minutes ago, so the pair of boys were leant lazily against the counter, as business was usually slow around that time.

"Matt, are we still on for the bar tonight?"

Friday night was Matt and Alex's 'guys night', along with a few more of their friends - Rian, Josh, Alan, Justin and Matt's boyfriend Zack. They usually spent it at the local bar, drinking a few beers and watching any act brave enough to get on the stage and perform.

"Pretty sure we are, yeah. D'you wanna shut up early? I think it's pretty pointless staying open any longer."

Alex hummed in agreement into the mug of hot chocolate he was holding, and sighed, not showing any signs of movement.

"Alex, just go. I'll clear up here. Just, go home, yeah?" Matt smiled, but his brow was littered with worry lines. That was one thing Alex didn't like about Matt - he was always worried about people, even over the tinniest of things.

"Okay," he replied quietly, putting his mug down and heading for the door, pulling off his apron on the way. "See ya later."

Alex left the cafe dejectedly, head hanging low on his shoulders. He didn't know what was wrong with him lately. It was like his whole world was spiralling downwards, with no way to stop it. It was at that moment when he understood why. He stopped walking, right in front of an empty patch of land - where the shelter used to be. He spent years of his life there, and now it was gone. And so was someone else - Jack. Alex hadn't seen Jack since that moment he woke up with the note in his pocket. And he missed him a whole damn lot. When Jack had first left, Alex was a mess. He wasn't eating, sleeping - hell, he'd barely moved for weeks. The problem was, Alex had never got any better, never forgot. Jack had never faded from Alex's mind. His face, smell, personality; it was all still hardwired into his brain. He'd lost his best friend, how was he supposed to react?

Of course, he had Matt now, who he loved and appreciated dearly, but he just wasn't Jack.

Alex turned away, and carried on walking slowly down the sidewalk towards his shared apartment. A huge droplet suddenly hit his cheek. He looked up just as the heavens opened, and the rain fell around him. He thought the rain was symbolic of his mood. He looked out across the children's playground, water bouncing off the slide, and the swings, and the lanky awkward man sitting on the swings.