For The Love Of You

Ryan had seven years of playing Warped Tour under her belt and every year, every summer, she met new people, she played new songs, she made new memories. Warped was one of the reasons she started a band. Warped was home.

It was a week into Warped and Ryan was insanely excited that Molly was bringing Sienna on the tour for a few days. Sienna was Ryan's little buddy and she'd be on tour, watching them play. It was awesome.

"Baby mama and baby are coming!" Ryan told Jake smiling.

"I know! A couple hours!" Jake grinned.

"We can get you one, if you want." Chris told her.

"A baby mama and a baby?" Ryan asked slowly.

"Just a baby." He said.

"Oh, well. No. I like his." She said pointing to Jake.

"His likes you, too." Jake rolled his eyes.

Ryan grabbed a Monster and left the bus after she kissed Jake's cheek. She ran into her best buddy, her drum tech, Luke. She helped him out for a while before he told her he was fine and she started walking around before she ran into Jesse.

"Jesse!" She yelled happily.

"Hey, Girl. What's up?" He asked her.

"Waiting for Jake's baby mama and baby to come." She smiled.

"You know kids like you, right?" He asked.

"It's weird. Kids and pets. I'm a magnet." She said.

"For guys, too." He said.

"Oh, not you too, Redboy." She sighed.

"You know it's true." He told her.

"it pisses me off. What time do you guys play?" She asked.

"Four. How about you?" He asked.

"Three twenty. Cutting it close." She said.

"You realize you don't have to watch us everyday, right?" He asked.

"Of course I do. There are four bands that I have to watch everyday no matter what. Yellowcard, you guys, Pierce The Veil and New Found Glory." She told him.

"You are a Yellowcard fanatic." He pointed out.

"Twelve years going." She smiled.

"What's up with you?" He asked slowly.

"I'm so jumpy. I wanna dance or something. Wanna dance?" She asked.

"You gotta go to your loveboy and your baby for ridiculous dancing." He told her.

"Well, we'll do that. But you're gonna join in. Come on." She said.

Jesse followed her to Sleeping With Sirens' bus and in it was the two people they were looking for along with a few others. Ryan explained her plan to Gabe and Justin and they both got up. Someone turned on some rap music making Ryan grin.

"Not only do we dance, we dance to Young Jeezy!? I'm coming here everyday for a dance party." Ryan said smiling.

"I'm down." Gabe said.

"There we go!" Ryan said.

Ryan listened to anything she liked. It was never genre related, it was music. She went from rap to metal to country. Her iPod was all over the place, but she enjoyed just about any kind of music. She just happened to enjoy rapping.

"You can rap?" Jesse asked her after F.A.M.E was over.

"That's what she does with her time." Tyler said from the couch.

Ryan rolled her eyes. Ryan wasn't big on having attention on her. If she was, she would've been singing her own songs, she would've enjoyed the attention she got from guys, she would've been different. But, she didn't like attention on her.

"Well, I'm gonna go do that." Ryan said slowly before she left.

It wasn't that her friends were making it their mission to put attention on her, it just happened because in that situation, it was her who brought the attention. When she left Sleeping With Sirens bus, she wandered around for a couple hours, watching random bands she stumbled across.

Then it was time for Yellowcard. She had watched them from the crowd and backstage, but she chose to watch from the crowd. It was weird when she became friends with them a few years ago. They were some of her music idols and they were her buddies.

That's why she played her music. She met people she looked up to for years, she became friends with them. It blew her mind. When their set was over, and LP threw his sticks, she caught one. Mind blowing, she thought. Weird, too.

"Thought I'd find you here." A voice said falling into step with her as she started back to her bus.

"Tall boy, what's up?" She smiled.

"I just met Sienna." He told her.

"I'm going to go find her right now." She said.

"I'm told you're her favorite." He said.

"She likes to fall asleep on my chest." She said.

"Who wouldn't?" He said making her laugh.

"Funny." She said.

"Oh, come on. What's up with you?" He asked.

"Got LP's stick today. That makes too many." She said slowly.

"You collect sticks?" He asked.

"Yep. I have four of his." She said.

"Interesting." He said slowly.

"Hey, I gotta go find my little ball of cuteness. I'll catch up with you later. Actually, we play in like thirty minutes. If you get in the crowd, I will throw you my stick. Promise." She told him.

"Alright, good deal." He nodded.

"But if you're not rockin' out, you don't get it." She smiled.

"Oh, there are conditions now?" He asked shaking his head.

"Hey, you smile, you get it." She said slowly.

"It's already mine." He said.

"You be cocky. I could change my mind." She told him before she smiled and went back to her bus.

When she walked in, Jake was holding Sienna and Molly was sitting next to them. She grinned and grabbed a water bottle before she sat down next to Jake. A happy little family, she thought smiling. They were happy.

"I get no 'hello'?" Molly asked.

"Hola. How goes it, Mama Molly?" Ryan smiled.

"It's going." Molly shrugged.

"She wants you." Jake told Ryan watching Sienna reach over to her.

"Baby!" Ryan smiled taking her.

"She likes you more than me." Jake said.

"I'm the cool aunt, you're the cool dad. There's a difference." She said.

"Yeah." He said slowly.

"You guys want some alone time?" She asked smirking.

"We have to play in like twenty minutes." He told her.

"So, we'll meet you at the stage. I'm gonna let her bang on my drums." She said as she stood up.

"Be careful." Molly told her.

"Aren't I always, Molly?" Ryan smirked.

"Ryan." Jake warned.

"I got it, I got it. We're gonna go party." Ryan announced as she walked out of the bus with Sienna in her arms.

Ryan liked kids. She liked animals too, but she knew that if she ever had either, she'd fuck them up like her parents fucked her up. She wasn't willing to fuck someone up like she and her brothers got it. It wouldn't be fair.

"My girl's got a baby." Kellin smiled walking up to her.

"This is Sienna. You've met her." Ryan told him.

"Yes, I have. Hi, Sienna." He said.

"I'm not sure she's talking yet. Are you talking yet?" Ryan asked Sienna making Kellin laugh, which caused Sienna to giggle.

"You like when I laugh? Well, aren't you cute." He said.

"That was so cute. We gotta go. I gotta go play." She said.

"If I'm not there will you bite me?" He smirked.

"No. Justin gave me a hickey like four days ago, though." She said.

"You're a weird person, you know that?" He asked.

"So I've been told." She said.

Kellin told her that he'd be there and let she and Sienna go. Walking through crowds with a baby was surprisingly difficult, Ryan figured out. When she got backstage, Tyler and Chris were there with most of Sleeping With Sirens.

"Girl has a baby!" Jack smiled.

"This is Sienna." Ryan said.

"Give me my goddaughter." Tyler pouted.

"She's my goddaughter, too. And she loves me more." She told him.

"Not true! You love me more, right, Sienna?" He asked.

"Here." She handed Sienna to him.

"Thank you, Ryan." He smiled.

"The cutest thing just happened. We ran into Kellin and he laughed and then she giggled. It was so damn cute." Ryan shook her head smiling.

"What was cute?" Jamie asked as he and Vic joined in on the conversation.

"Kellin laughed and then Sienna, that's Sienna, she giggled." Ryan told him.

Everyone drooled over Sienna until Jake and Molly showed up looking rather sweaty, and Molly held her. When Madden took the stage, Ryan took her hair out of the pony tail she kept it in and put on the red bandana she wore every time they played.

Every set, every tour, every time. She had to wear that bandana because it was her father's. The only thing she ever learned from him that was positive was his good luck charm. The same good luck charm that she wore every performance.

While Jake took a sip of water, Ryan thought about her father for moment. Where he was, what he was doing. Did she have more siblings out there, was he alive? She had no idea. She almost wanted to know. Almost.

When the set was over, Ryan spotted Mike and tossed one of her sticks his way and the other as far as she could throw it. When they walked off stage, she watched Jake kiss Sienna's head and flicked his arm.

"What?" He asked slowly.

"That was the most adorable thing I've ever seen in my life." She told him.

Ryan pulled the bandana off her head and folded it back up and stuck it back in her pocket. She pulled her sweaty hair back up in a pony tail and decided to go back to the bus. She climbed on top of the bus and took her sweaty shirt off when her phone rang.

"Brother from the same mother." She smiled.

[Yeah, they named me Daniel. Remember that?]

"Yeah, they named me Ryan."

[Weird, right?]

"Ehh. What's up, man?"

[Mom.]

"What's up with her?"

[She uhh...this new boyfriend. Umm. Has Adam talked to you?]

"Not in a few hours."

[Mom's in the hospital.]

"This new boyfriend hit her?"

[Yeah.]

"She's seen worse. She alright?"

[Yeah. Broken arm.]

"I'll call her later."

[We have to do something, Ryan. How many years has this been going on?]

"Guys hitting her? Well, I'm twenty six...so twenty six years. Our sperm donor was the first."

[Did you hear about David?]

"Yeah. Adam's pretty torn up about it."

[Where are you?]

"On top of our bus."

[I meant what city, Ryan.]

"Oh. I'm not sure. We're in Ventura, I think. Chula Vista's in two days. You coming out?"

[Hell yeah.]

"Alright, cool. I'll call you tomorrow. I'll call Mom in a few hours. I gotta go."

[Alright. Ruhh you.]

"Ruhh you, too."

Ryan grabbed her shirt and climbed back down. She put her shirt back on and made her way through the crowds to catch Sleeping With Sirens just as they were going on stage. Ryan threw an empty water bottle at Justin making him smile.

"I'm here, Baby!" She told him.

"I see. No bite today." He smiled before he went out on stage.

She stood where she was, watching them. After their set, Gabe, who was shirtless, hugged her making her laugh and push him off of her. She told them she'd be around and went on the hunt for someone to entertain her.