You Keep Me Safe and I Will Keep You Wild

Kodi's POV
I had no idea how I dragged myself into this. I wasn't capable of having an ordinary relationship. I didn't do dates, I hated dates, they always ended badly. I was never what they thought I was.

My heart was racing a million miles a second as I heard a knock at the door. I didn't even know if it was him but it didn't matter, I was freaking out.

"You will be fine," my dad's nurse Marie put her hand on my back.
"I don't want to leave him here," I looked back at my dad sitting in his chair completely oblivious as to what was going on around him.
"He will be fine too, I am here to look after him don't worry, now go, have fun."

My hand was shaking as I grabbed the handle and turned it to reveal the one guy I was dying but dreading to see all at the same time.

"Hi," he smiled looking extremely smart in a pair of dress pants and a button down shirt.
"Hi," I was highly impressed with what was standing in front of me.

"Oh these for you," he pulled out a small bouquet of red roses.
"You think because I have rose tattoos on my arm that I like roses?"
"Well..." He looked rather shy.
"It's ok, I love them," I lent up and kissed his cheek.

"Um just give me a second, I will be right back," I ran as fast as I could in my heels to out them in a case on the bench and say a quick goodbye to my dad.
"I love you sweetie," his shaking hand held into mine.
"I love you too dad," I kissed his forehead and left before I began crying again.

Seeing my dad like this was killing me but I guess all lives to come to end and his was slowly doing so.

"You ok?" Evgeni asked as he helped me out of the car.
"Yeah I am ok," I took his hand as he was being a pure gentleman right now.

"You know I don't think I have ever had someone other than my dad do that for me," I smiled as he pushed the chair in behind me.
"Some men dumb," he shrugged, "women deserve it."
"Well I am glad there are some real men left in this world."

I don't know how he was doing this but with every word of jumbled English and all the frustrated noises he made when he couldn't quiet form a sentence was getting. It was getting to me big time.

I couldn't help myself from just staring at him as he talked. I didn't care what about I just wanted loved to listen to him and whatever was going on in his world. Because even his worst day was better then my best.

"You live in Pittsburgh always?" he sat back in his chair suddenly seeming completely interested in me.
"Yeah me and my dad."
"Brothers? Sisters?"
"Nope just me."
"What about mum?" He frowned.
"She left when I was a kid."
"Oh, I am sorry."
"It's ok," I began fiddling with my napkin, "what about you? Do you have any brothers or sisters?" I really just wanted to stop talking about me.
"Brother, Denis."
"Does he play hockey too?"
"He kids coach."
"Oh so your the star in the family huh?"
"Not star, just me."
"Your really sticking with this humble thing aren't you?"
"I just play hockey, not fight war, not real hero," he shrugged.
"Well some kids would beg to differ."

"What about your dad? He nice guy?"
"Yeah," I sighed. Which then of course I started thinking about my dad and how he was the greatest man in the whole world. He was everything. Sure we fought a lot but in his sickness it brought us together and now I don't know what I am going to do when he is gone.

"Everything ok?" I was dragged out of my thoughts when he grabbed my hand.
"I have to go home."
"I say something?" He looked really worried.
"No, no I just... My dad is really sick and he is at home, I just feel bad for leaving him."
"Ok um, we go."

"I am really sorry," I apologised for like the tenth time as we stood on the front porch.
"Is ok, we try again later," he shrugged.

"Kodi," I heard my dad's dull, weak voice call from inside.
"Yeah dad?"
"You have friend not tell me."
"You really should go," I whispered to Evgeni.
"But," he pointed inside to where my dad was calling.
"Kodi come on sweetie," Marie stood at the door with a smile, "he's ok for now. Don't worry."

I had been so scared for people to be around because my dad would say things and do things he didn't mean but with his illness it wasn't him. Half the time it wasn't my dad.

Evgeni followed me inside to where my dad was sitting in his chair, blanket over him rugged up nice and warm.
"Hey dad," I knelt down by his side, "how you feeling?"
"Ok," his eyes tried to focus on Evgeni. Which was weird in itself because my dad never looked right at anyone anymore.
"Oh this is my friend Evgeni."
"Hi," he looked a little unsure as to what to do.
"Come here son," my dad seemed really interested in him as he grabbed onto his hand and it brought a smile to my face to see my dad engaging in conversation with him. It was the most I had heard talk in a long time but at the same I was annoyed. I didn't want someone else coming in and feeling all sorry for us, it was our life and there was nothing else we could do about it.

"He nice man," Evgeni stood at the door.
"And I would really appreciate it if you didn't come back around, we can hang out but I don't want my dad thinking he is letting anyone down."
"No, I want to. I want be there for you," he stuttered.
"Just go please."
"Kodi don't."
"Evgeni just go... Go!" I pushed him away, "Please just go," I begged continuing to push him towards his car, "go."
"Kodi stop," he turned around and grabbed me, "just stop."
"I can't," I cried, "I can't keep letting people down, I just can't."
"Shhh it's ok. I am here, I not leave."

I don't know why I was trying to push him away. Thinking of excuse to justify freaking out wasn't going to happen. Because seeing my dad smile made me happy for the first time since this started, I was happy even just for a moment.