A Far Cry From Innocence.

The obvious struggle Zacky was having made me feel sorry for him. But I wasn't going to tell him he could wait, he'd already said he needed to talk about this. My heart raced and I fidgeted, excitement pumping through my veins like a drug. He seemed to be taking forever to say anything and I wanted to reach over and demand that he tell me what he was trying to say. It was maddening.

Zacky opened his eyes and looked at me desperately like he wished I could read his mind so he didn't have to say this. It only made me want to hear it that much more, his inability to spit out the same words he'd told my brother just two days ago... The same words that he wrecked their friendship. Whatever it was had also damaged the relationship I had with my brother, something that obviously hurt Brian more than anything.

He looked as if he were about to say something but he quickly snapped his mouth shut, his teeth clicking together sharply, and he looked over my shoulder with wide eyes. "Dude, it's not what you think!" He looked like he wanted to run away, like he could see the grim reaper over my shoulder and knew it was his time.

I slowly turned my head to see what had him acting like that, even though I already knew what I'd see. Sure enough, my brother stood a couple yards away; his arms were stiffly by his sides with his hands balled into fists, his eyes were wide with fury and his face was dark red. "You fucking... THERE ISN'T EVEN A WORD HORRIBLE ENOUGH FOR YOU, BAKER!" He winced, closing his eyes and putting a hand on his head. Well, I'd been right about that hangover. He walked over and looked at me angrily, "After everything I've told you about him, you still want to hang around with this disgusting pervert?"

I sat back and crossed my arms, looking at my brother. I couldn't believe he was acting to absurd and over the top. "Yeah. I wanted to hear what he had to say and -"

The emotion in his eyes changed quickly to panic and he looked between Zacky and I. He leaned over to be closer to my level but was stall partially looking down at me. "He didn't tell you... did he?" His voice was urgent and he tried to hide the concern that I still caught.

I shook my head and looked at Zacky, who had shrunk down in his seat quite a ways. I could tell he was trying to be as invisible as possible and trying not to draw Brian's attention. I looked back at my brother and shook my head again, "No, he was about to tell me before you came barging in here." I looked back toward Zacky, who shook his head urgently.

Brian glared over at Zacky, obviously no longer concerned since I still didn't know what this big secret. He looked ready to reach across the table and finish what had been started twice yesterday, both times cut short by someone ripping the two apart. "I really thought I made it clear that I want you to stay away from my sister and my house," he growled, even baring his teeth like a rabid dog.

Zacky slowly looked at me then back at Brian. "I think she deserves to know, man. I mean... she'll know soon enough anyway. You can't hide it forever," he muttered quietly, cautiously. He was walking on eggshells in a bullpen, and he was only wearing red. One bad thing could set Brian off, and he already needed defusing.

I quickly jumped into before Brian had a chance to get angrier, or even react to be honest. Zacky had just gotten the last syllable of his sentence out before I jumped in. "He's right. And, I mean, if you guys aren't at each other's throats and everything goes back to the way it was... Then I'll stay at Casa del Syn."

I must've said the right words, because Brian looked at me quickly with a hopeful smile. "Really, you'll stay?" He sounded like a kid that had just been told they could open a Christmas present early. His eyes were bright and he looked ready to tackle me in the biggest hug anyone had ever received.

With a nod, I smiled at my brother. When his smile only grew, I laughed and smirked. "Hey, Hazzard doesn't exist without Syn or Hellrazor." I looked at Zacky for a second then back at my brother, my smile fading a little. "I also like being Gizmo just as much as I like being Hazzard, though. And Gizmo is nothing without Twitch." I was hoping this would help smooth things out, and maybe my brother would stupid acting so stupid.

Brian looked at Zacky, the first time without a glare since that night this whole thing started, and he sighed. He shook his head and looked between me and Zacky before resting his look at Zacky. His expression hardened and he said, "Alright, fine. You can hang around again. But I don't want you to tell her. Not yet..." He sat back and crossed his arms, obviously not the most fond of this idea.

Zacky smiled and stood up, looking down at my brother. He held his arm out to shake hands. "We cool, brother?"

Brian looked up at Zacky with a raised brow. He chuckled and shook his head, standing up and hugging Zacky. "Yeah, we're cool." He smacked Zacky on the back and smirked, "Just don't do anything else stupid, okay?"

Zacky laughed and nodded, sitting back down. "Yeah, I'll leave being stupid to you." He sighed, as if the whole world had been lifted from his shoulders. He looked like a new man, his eyes brighter and and smile on his face. It was a good thing to see.

However, that meant that I still didn't know what had changed everything a couple days ago... And, apparently, I wasn't going to find out for a while yet. It was beyond frustrating and it made me want to scream, but I was a step closer and my brother and his best friend were okay again. I knew I'd find out what had happened, even if it wasn't right now.

Lunch had gone incredibly well. Zacky and Brian joked around and picked on me like nothing had ever happened, though I could still sense a little tension from my brother. He obviously wasn't going to just forget and forgive whatever it was Zacky has said a couple days ago that changed their friendship, but he was willing to push it back and try.

x-x-x-x-x

I grabbed the bottle of beer Brian had given me as I lounged on the couch. He was lounged in the recliner, eyes closed though I knew he was awake. I muted the television as it went to commercial and played with the paper label for a minute before taking a drink. "Hey Bri?"

He slowly opened one eye and looked at me. He shimmied a little in the chair and closed his eyes, pulling the level that raised the footrest. "Mm, yeah?"

I tapped the neck of the bottle against my knee for a minute while I tried to find how to phrase what had been on my mind all day. I wanted to know, it was stubbornly in the front of my mind. "What does Zacky what to tell me that you don't want me to know?"

Brian stiffened and slowly opened his eyes to look at me. He just sat there, staring for a long time before he sighed and shook his head. "Avigaiel, just leave it alone, alright? He and I made up and we're cool, so just drop it." He looked at me sternly then closed his eyes again.

That definitely wasn't what I wanted to hear but it was something that I definitely expected. I sighed and sat back, taking another drink. I didn't want to drop it, I wanted to know. And I didn't think it was fair to keep it from me, especially after Zacky insisted that it was something I deserved to know.

Obviously sensing what I had been thinking, Brian groaned and opened his eyes once more. "Christ, Avigaiel. Just be patient and you'll find out before long." He sighed and shook his head, adding in a mumble, "Whether I like it or not."

What Zacky felt I needed to know was something Brian didn't like, and it was something I'd know soon before long. I picked my brain to try to figure out what this thing could be, only to come to a very disappointing defeat. I downed the rest of what was in the bottle and groaned, laying on the couch. Maybe I could talk with my bandmates tomorrow at our rehearsal. Maybe another perspective was all I needed.