Heart Shaped Wreckage

Elaine

“Daddy!” cried the little girl with long, brown curly hair. Her eyes were wide with happiness as her small hands reached out in front of her, opening and shutting them to get her father attention. Even though his heart was aching and all he wanted to do was crawl into a black whole and never come out, the sight of his daughter made him smile. He would openly admit that she gave a beat to his lifeless heart, without a doubt. Grinning, he bent down and caught his flying daughter into his arms and picked her up while placing kisses all over her face. She was giggling and trying to push him away because his beard tickled her face. When he pulled away Elaine was grinning ear-to-ear. “Daddy, Miss Tee said I can show you my dwawing!” She exclaimed, her eyes getting brighter.

In the back of his mind, Will was unsure how or when he was going to tell his little girl that her mother left them. Hell, he wasn’t even sure she could understand it. So he sighed and decided it was best to ask Theresa, the owner of the day care.

As he let go of his daughter, he felt the warmth leave him and his heart going cold. His eyes looked up into Theresa’s brown ones. She smiled politely at him. “Hi, Will,” She said. He cleared his throat and got down to business.

When they got home, he set Elaine down on the counter and looked into her big rounds eyes. They filled him with that warmth and he realized that maybe, if she continued to love him as much as she does, things could get easy.

But he didn’t know how hard it was going to be then.

“Elli,” Her father said, his eyes full of sadness. Her feet were banging against the counter softly and she was smiling with happiness. He didn’t want to take that smile off her face, but Theresa was right—she needed to know.

“Daddy,” She said with a smile. “Can we go to the park after we eat dinner?”

He sighed and grabbed her from the counter. Instead he sat down on a chair in the kitchen and sat her in his lap, one of his arms going around her to keep her protected.

“No, baby girl, not today.” She frowned but said okay anyways. She was always such a great little girl, even as a baby she was delightful—how could he tell her something that would most likely break her heart?

But he had to.

So he breathed in and tucked some loose curls behind her ears and smiled down at his daughter sadly. “Elaine, daddy has to tell you something important.” She looked up at him, clueless as to what he meant by important. His heart was breaking even at the thought of mentioning to her—even thinking about it.

His mind went back to the letter he had found on the table, he read it over quickly and ran into the bedroom. Things were in disorder—his clothes were strewn about and coat hangers were all over the floor. There was a picture on the floor of the three of them and it was gone, but the frame was broken. He thought he had made her happy—he gave her a big house, a baby—everything she had ever asked for, he gave it to her. Maybe that’s what caused her to leave, who knew. She didn’t say much but that she loved us.

She just felt like she was being swallowed.

“Elaine, mommy had to go away.” Her eyes showed how confused she was still.

“When will mommy be bwack?” She questioned. He ran his free hand through his own curly and unruly hair, and breathed in so that he could keep his tears at bay. But one slipped and she gasped. “Daddy sad,” She said with a frown.

He breathed in and took her small hand into his. “Baby, mommy’s not coming back.”

It took him a while to get her to settle down and eat something. He had to explain to her that he wasn’t sure where mommy was going. It still confused her but she understood that Lori wasn’t coming back for her or for him.

And he wasn’t sure what he was upset about most: that she left him, or that she left her? Or was it because she left both of them, without even a goodbye?