Abused

I hold the newspaper tighter in my hand. "A large computer company closed down in Las Vegas. 250 people without a job."
As if I didn't know already. I feel like ripping the newspaper into a thousand pieces, but then I decide that it wasn't its fault. It was no one's fault. I sigh and let go of the paper.

I let it fall on the table, right next to my cold apple tea. In the morning I felt like comforting myself with a perfect hot cup of my favourite tea, but then I decided to read the stupid newspaper. I had yesterday even enjoyed the fact that I could sleep long after a long day, without having to wake up. But of course, I couldn't sleep at all.

I probably have HUGE dark shadows under my eyes, and I didn't bother to spend any time on fixing my face with make up in the morning. Instead, I just sit on a chair, with a cup of cold tea and a stupid newspaper.

Fuck this screams something in my mind. I stand up and grab the cup, deciding against drinking it. It would taste horrible, and that would make me feel even worse. I throw the cup in the sink, not bothering to see if it got broken. I walk calmly in the small living room and sit down on my couch. I grab a pillow and a blanket and immediately feel a bit better just sitting there. Millions of thoughts run trough my head. And most of them are not very nice. I distract myself, and force myself to think about something else.

I notice a pile of unopened letters on the couch. In the morning I didn't feel like opening them. I know for sure that the big brown letter contains details of my last salary. And, the other ones are probably ads hidden inside envelopes or hate letters from my dad. Yeah, he does that sometimes.

I grab the first letter and slowly rip it open. I find a boring white paper with tiny font in it. I start reading it. "... blah blah blah.."
"..due to that we are sorry to say that all employees will only receive 50% of their normal salary.."
Okay. WHAT?! I read the last sentence again and again. 50%? What do you mean 50%?? I feel like killing the paper. But then I decide that I might need it, so it wouldn't be very wise to destroy it just yet.

My first reaction is horror, absolute horror. My full pay was 3000 dollars, minus taxes. This month I would only receive a bit less than 1500. When I would pay all the bills, such as water and electricity amongst the others I would maybe have a bit less than 1000. And the rent for my house is 1250.
I can't afford to pay my rent! And, then I realise something even worse. The only way to get money is either find a job and fast, because the month is only half way trough.. Otherwise I would have to go at my father's and beg him for money. And the last option would be the same as jumping in front of a train, hoping that your death will be fast and painless. Really. He wouldn't give me half a dollar.

I take another letter in my hands. It looks like my father's handwriting, so I destroy it by ripping it in two large pieces. Then I throw them on the floor.

I run in my kitchen and grab the newspaper again. Earlier I hadn't bothered to see if there were any available jobs, because my original plan was to stay home for at least until end of the month. But now I can't. I need a job. I really really NEED money. I feel my body shiver with the idea of seeing my dad 24/7, for a long time. I would be a dead woman by the time I could afford to move out again.

I scroll trough the pages in a hurry. Nothing interesting. Only doctors and dentists and one police officer. There are 249 other people from the company now looking for a job as well. And I surely wouldn't get anything. I sigh and sadly give up. But then my eyes notice something.
A job. A job for my training.

I pick the newspaper in my hands, and read it all over and over again. I don't even bother to look at any other jobs. This is it. Either this or homeless. "Travel Channel". I have never ever heard of such a channel, but I don't care. This may be my only opportunity to get a job before it is far too late. "Interviews 19th of March at 3:30 pm. Please contact us in the number ..."
I already have my phone in my hands. They are shaking wildly. My heart feels like it is coming straight trough my chest, but I don't care.. This is it. I keep repeating myself, that this may be it. My chance.

In the other end of the line, there is an old woman. She introduces herself as a secretary of the Travel Channel. I tell her all the details she wants to know, such as my graduation year and work experience. I graduated from a good school. I had to work my ass off, though, because my dad didn't pay for anything. He always kept complaining about the fact that I had to live with him until I was 21. And when I graduated, I was more than happy to move out and have a place of my own. Unfortunately, my dad moved near Las Vegas last year, when I turned 26.

"We would be glad to see you at 3:30pm today.." I could throw the phone on the floor and start doing a victory dance, but I decide that it would be better to end the phone call politely to make a good impression. I say my goodbyes and thank her. Then I hear a silent click. And then I am already running in the bathroom to get my face done.

The main problem with my face is the giant yellow bruise in my eye. It is healing, but it still looks very bad. It won't give a good first impression. I try very hard to hide it with make up, but you can still see it if you look closely. I apply the rest of my make up and run in my bedroom to find some clothes to wear. I choose a pair of dark jeans and a white, clean shirt. I collect my hair in a bun and add some hair spray. Then I take a look at the clock and notice it is 2:45 pm. Oh, shit.. I still have to find my papers and stuff for the interview!

I rush in the kitchen and pick my phone from the table where I dropped it after the phone call. Then I hurry in the bedroom and start searching for my important folders. After about 15 minutes of searching and messing up the whole room I manage to find them. I tuck them in my bag and run outside. I still have to catch a bus and beg that I can make it on time.

I sit on the couch very nervously. My legs are shaking wildly, but I somehow manage to hide it. The secretary who spoke with me earlier told me to wait right here. So I sit here, all by myself, wondering where are the other 249 jobless people from my company. Because this place is absolutely empty.

The hallway has many blue and grey doors. There are some large glass windows, and I keep distracting myself by staring outside. People come and go, run and disappear in the bus on the bus stop. Cars keep coming and going and they soon start to look like a river. There are so many of them. I sigh again very nervously.

I take a look at my phone, staring at the clock. 3:27 pm. The last minutes are always the worst, to me at least. I hate the way I keep making up horror stories in my head. I have figured out at least a hundred ways how I could ruin the whole thing. But I really can't afford losing this opportunity. I have to get this job, I just have to.

Once I notice the clock is 3:28 pm, I start fixing my hair worriedly. I also can't help staring at the yellow bruise. You can see it even better in the daylight, especially when there are so many windows here. I hope there are none in the room where I will be interviewed. I really don't want to seem like the kind of woman who drinks heavily and gets in trouble. I really don't do that. I don't have many friends, and I actually don't like alcohol. It only makes me feel very sick and then it makes me throw up. And the headache. I only have to think about it to make my head hurt.

I feel my own heartbeat against my chest. I can also hear it with my own ears. I hope that no one will notice how nervous I really am. I have never been in a job interview before. I got my job right after graduation from school, which meant that I got paid less for being a non experienced person. And they found my name in the website of our school, so I didn't have to worry about anything. They were so sure that a person from that good school would be good enough for them. So they didn't even arrange an interview. And here I am, soon having my first job interview in the age of 26.

I take another look at the clock. 3:31 pm. Oh god. Run. My legs want to run. But I refuse. Calm the fuck down, Nadine, you really need this job, or your are in a hell of a trouble.

"Miss Greene?" I hear a voice, calling me by my last name. I almost fall from the chair. I count slowly into ten and then I stand up, and walk towards the source of the voice.

I notice an opened door nearby, and walk towards it. Then I notice a scary looking man. He has a black suit and red tie. No doubt, a business man. Perhaps owner of this whole thing. It makes me eep inside my head and consider about escaping. I step a bit closer and try to smile, even though it probably looks like a weird grin. I shake hands with him. He smiles a little. "This way please." He opens the door and I step inside. Be brave, Nadine. Remember, don't ruin this now.

"Please, have a seat." I smile a bit wider. "Thank you, sir." He is a lot older than me, maybe in his late 40's or early 50's. I sit in a chair, and try not to look tired.

The man, who introduces himself as Mr. Clark, takes out some papers in front of him. "So, miss Greene, I was told that you are currently applying on Travel Channel's available job.." I nod firmly and try to look a bit more confident. "Yes, sir." He takes another look at the papers, and then looks back at me. "You graduated in 2008, and you have five years of experience. Is that correct?" I nod again. "Yes, sir." He nods in return. "How long have you been jobless?" I smile widely. "Only soon two days." He seems a bit amused by the fact that I already was looking for a job. He writes down some details after a few questions. "What would you consider as your greatest weakness?" He doesn't seem to notice the bruise in my eye at all, and I am very happy that he doesn't. Might be that he is too polite to pay any attention, though. And I really appreciate it.

I explain him everything about my greatest weakness. Which, in this case, is not brown-eyed men, but perfectionism. I am a perfectionist. And also a workaholic. But you usually choose only one for a job interview. It's not good to tell them that you have many weaknesses.

"I assume you read all the detail about this job." It was not a question. I nod, and then curse in my mind, that I hadn't actually read them. "I would like you to meet a few people. They are from the show you would be working with." I nod again. "I would be glad to meet them, sir." He smiles at me and then shouts something out loud. I try to think, but nothing comes up. Great, Nadine, now you have no idea what you have to do when you meet these people- But I assume that because I hadn't even heard of The Travel Channel before this, I can't know the people I am going to meet. Just don't let it have anything to do with spiders. Or even worse, darkness. I am absolutely horrified by darkness. I have always been. To me it represents everything I hate. Death. Coldness. Sorrow. Hate. War. It makes me shiver.

I am awakened from my thoughts when I see two guys walk in the room. A pretty tall guy, with somewhat brown hair. He is wearing casual jeans and a long sleeved shirt. He looks friendly. He is followed by a guy, who is a bit shorter and he has a beard. He looks like a giant teddy bear. I smile brightly. He looks a bit older than the one in front of him, but I am not quite sure. They both enter the room and Mr. Clark introduces them. "These are Nick Groff and Aaron Goodwin." I smile at them and mumble a 'nice to meet you'.

"And, this, gentlemen, is Miss Greene." They say their greetings. Both seem very nice. And not at all like mr. Clark. They are very much like normal people. Not like TV-starts or celebrities. Or businessmen like mr. Clark.

Nick shakes hands with me, and so does Aaron. Now I am able to read the text in Aaron's shirt. "GAC CREW." GAC?

"These three gentlemen will explain everything better than I do. And please, feel free to ask them if you come up with any questions." I nod. "Thank you, sir." Mr. Clark shakes hands with me for the last time, before rising and grabbing his folders. Then he exits the room quietly. Aaron and Nick seem to be very nice guys, so I say: "Three gentlemen? Either one of you is invisible, or I am blind." Nick grins and Aaron chuckles. "Zak's late, as always." Zak? "Okay." I nod and sit patiently.

"So, what made you apply for this job?" Nick asks suddenly, as if to make the atmosphere a bit more friendly. "Umm.. It seemed.. interesting." Aaron laughs. "Yeah, interesting it is!" I smile brightly.

Suddenly I hear loud footsteps. So loud in fact that either the person is a gentleman wearing high heels, or..

I notice a tall guy with dark, spiky hair. He is pretty big, and I don't mean from his stomach. He has a nice, well built chest and arms.. But his eyes are.. I try not to drool or make it too obvious that I am staring. But, his eyes are perfect. They are.. not dark, like I usually love men's eyes. These are different. Almost like.. beautiful. And his smile makes me want to scream and run out of the room. He is simply perfect. Shut up, mind.

"This is Zak", says Aaron and he grins widely. "A gaze magnet." Zak rolls his eyes and whispers a quiet 'shut up Aaron', and Aaron snorts. "I'm Zak Bagans." He comes closer to shake hands with me. "Nadine Greene." Oh, fuck, I almost forgot my own name. But I soon get over the shock, because I realise that I have to think about Zak as my maybe-future-workmate. It almost causes me to sigh out loud.

"Zak is the lead investigator of the show", Nick tells me. "Investigator?" I mentally kick myself, when I realise that I just said that OUT LOUD. They all look at each other and Aaron bursts our laughing. "Yeah, investigator." I nod and try to understand what I have missed. Something important, obviously. "What do you investigate?" I just had to ask that. "Pony farms", Aaron says and grins widely. It causes me to roll my eyes. "If the name is GAC, what would you think?" Aaron asks and chuckles again. I laugh a bit, even though I don't know why.

Zak takes a seat in front of me, but he seems awfully quiet for the whole time. I mainly only talk with Nick and Aaron. Zak just sits there, but he doesn't say a word. I find out that they are ghost investigators and it causes me to shiver, and nearly freak out. I haven't even decided if I believe in such things. And also, I hate darkness. I do. So this way I might have to face it.

But luckily I hear that they are only looking for someone who will make trailers for their shows and help editing the show, and setting up some computers during the lockdowns. And sometimes help them with fixing audio or cameras, but I would never have to be in the darkness, or face it. It all sounds so interesting that I want the job really bad. At least one thing is for sure. This would be one of a kind experience!

Zak's attitude bothers me a bit, but I decide not to care about it. It's not that he hates me. Or how can I know.. But we have never met before and he looks like a nice person. He wouldn't judge anyone by only looks, or would he?