Abused

"People like you should just die. You're worthless. A piece of shit. A stain on white silk. A stain that's hard to wash away. Really. You are the poisoned apple he shouldn't have tasted. You should never have been born. Just do me a favour. Just die. He doesn't love you. He doesn't need you."

The deep, demonic voice keeps whispering. I furrow my brows in confusion. This is a bad dream. It has to be.

"There is someone better for him out there. Someone he deserves, someone who deserves him more than you do. He doesn't want you. He just likes you as a friend, but is too shy to admit it. Just let him go. He'll be happy. Free. Free from the nightmares you cause him."

I try to open my eyes to make the bad dream stop, but nothing happens. My eyelids weigh a ton. I just can't open my eyes. What is this? What is happening to me? I refuse to listen, but that doesn't work, either. I just lay somewhere, absolutely frozen. As if there was someone, holding me down. It's also cold. Very cold. But I can't do anything. I can just lay there. And freeze. Fuck. Did I fall asleep outside or something?

"You are ugly. Both from the inside and from the outside. Uglier from the inside, though. You'll be his death. That's the fate. He'll die. Because of you. This is your last chance. Since I am so generous, I wanted to warn you. Do you want him to die?"

I feel my body shiver with utmost fear. Who is this voice? Is this just a normal nightmare? Am I even asleep? Actually, where am I? If here's someone else than me, it's a very demonic someone. Who has a very convincing voice. As if it was honestly true. Those things he is saying. They aren't, are they?

"If you love him, you'll let him go. Otherwise, you are his death sentence. You will kill him. You will do it. Yourself. With your hands. The same hands that have touched his innocent skin will draw innocent blood. I don't care how you do it. You'll just grab a knife, run him over with your car. No matter how, you'll do it. You can't escape the fate. The destiny brought you two together. You and a human."

I am able to feel my hands shake, and I unconsciously bite my lower lip. I can taste disgusting blood in my mouth. That can't be true! I'd never hurt Zak. I love him. If he died, I would too. I can't! I couldn't! The dream makes me angry and frustrated but I am absolutely paralysed and unable to move. So I just lay there. Afraid. What did it mean? Me and a human? I am a fucking human! My mind is insane. Has to be. Only insane people can see such dreams. No, not dreams. Nightmares.

"You are a demon. Now you'll need to kill him, or die. Kill him! Do it. KILL HIM!"

A sob leaves my lips. "No! I can't. I wont! Please! NO!" I scream in horror as suddenly pictures of me grabbing a knife and murdering the only person I've ever truly loved. The pain makes my chest hurt, and my head feels like it's about to explode. Am I having a heart attack or something? I can't breathe. The pain goes down my chest, down my stomach.

"Kill him. Kill him. Kill him. Kill him. Kill him. Kill him. Kill him. Kill him."

I feel a sudden wave of utter anger wash over me. "No! LEAVE ME ALONE. Leave me fucking alone!" I scream trough the dream. And then I burst out crying hysterically at the picture of me holding his bloody, lifeless body on my arms. It can't happen. It mustn't. I need him. This is just a nightmare. A weird and sick nightmare.

I feel hands around myself. I scream. It's getting me. It's touching me. The devil. It's touching me trough the dream. It wants me to die. This isn't just a dream, is it? It's paranormal. It's here, to get me. To drag me in the depths of hell because of all the bad things I've done in life. But then I stop and think for a while. Seriously. Three words. What the fuck? This doesn't happen in real life, right? In bad horror movies. So it is a dream. It has to be. It doesn't make me feel any better.

"Let me go! Let. Me. Go!" I scream and try to squirm away from the strong grip, holding my arm. "Nad!" I hear a familiar voice. "Nadine!" It calls me. It feels weird. I feel warmth, radiating from very human skin. That touch feels human. I finally feel the dark entity, the cold and strong entity leave. And I am able to open my eyes. Finally.

I find a very sleepy but concerned Zak, whose hair is a total mess and his eyes are beautiful, sleepy blue. His eyebrows furrow, and then he huffs in relief. His lips look.. Ah.. His lips look so tempt-.. Nadine. WAIT a second there. You just had the worst dream of your life, and then, the first thing that crosses your mind after waking up is this. Well. At least it's a sign I'm perfectly alright. And I hope I'm not drooling or anything.

"Nad. Are you.. Are you okay?" He asks softly, eyeing me carefully. I take a deep breath, try to stop crying as it seems I'm still doing it, and nod. "Yeah.. It was.. Just a bad dream." I mumble and he nods. He brings my head to his strong, well-built chest and slides his fingers trough my messy hair comfortingly. His scent and his presence help me calm down and strop crying. I close my eyes for a moment. He is here. I am not going to hurt him. I am not a bad person. At least, I am not a demon. I am a human. Nadine Greene. A human. A human. It was just a dream. A nightmare. It's over. I'll never need to hear that fucking creepy low-budget horror movie effect voice again. Phew.

"Wanna talk about it?" He brakes the silence. I open my eyes. "Nah." I couldn't. It would scare him. Wouldn't it? "You sure? I'm here to listen", he says and slides his hand down my back. I am distracted by his touch, so I just repeat my 'nah'. I'll tell him another time. Maybe. Perhaps. Some day.

"Do you wanna go back to sleep?" I ask but he just huffs. His warm breath washes over me and makes me shiver. "Not really. Since I'm awake now", he says. I smile gently. This is perfect. Just me and him, the two of us, in the middle of a night all alone. No one else exists. Just the two of us. In our own little world.

I crawl closer to him and touch his lip with my thumb. It seems to amuse him, as he grins. His lip feels so soft, so full.. He's perfect. He is. Down to the very last detail. How could anyone destroy something so perfect like him? No one could. Not even the devil. The voice echoes in my mind and makes me shiver. Zak notices that as he states: "You're cold." He doesn't give me enough time to argue. He just moves his hand, gets a blanket and wraps it around me. "Better?" I nod.

I guess at some point we fell asleep because in the morning I woke up on his chest.

**
"Don't take anything you really don't need with you in Italy."

His words keep repeating inside my head. That's what Nick said earlier today. That I shouldn't take stuff I wont need with me to Italy. It's so weird. Only four more days and we're there. Hopefully. If the plane doesn't crash. Which is the biggest problem of all. Flying. I mean, in my mind it's a very likely option that we all die in a plane crash. But as I've made it trough two flights before, I have decided to make it trough two more. With Zak. He'll be there. Fortunately.

I've never been to Italy. I don't know what it'll be like. I don't know how people dress up in Italy. I don't know how they behave in Italy, nor what they ear, where they live.. I can't speak a word Italian. No, wait. I know one word. Ciao. But no idea how one should say that. I chuckle and throw another clean shirt into my bag. I suppose I have three others already. But you always need clean shirts, right? And socks. Those will come with me. And loads of other stuff. But I am really trying not to take all of my clothes with me.

Zak said he'd be back in two hours. I have been impatiently waiting, staring at the clock twice every ten seconds. How does the time go so slow? He's with Aaron and Nick at the office, taking care of some Poveglia stuff. However, he said that he didn't need me there this time. So I stayed at home, and at first I tried to watch the TV. Two hours. That should be two episodes of any soap opera. But no. I couldn't do it. I got so bored that I couldn't watch the TV. I tried everything. And right now I am packing my clothes excitedly for the days in Italy. Honestly. Just, wow. I'm a bit scared of the island itself, though, because so many people died there and it's said to be one of the most haunted places on Earth. There I'm not going to walk without Zak, at least. Wow. Now I sound really small and pathetic, don't I?

As I am neatly folding my grey sweatpants, I hear someone unlock the door. I feel my heart jump lightly. He's here. Zak's here! It was a great idea to give him the keys into my apartment. "Hey, Nad! I'm back", he shouts from the hallway. I stand quickly up, stop everything I am doing, drop all the socks from my lap and rush to greet him by the door. I almost run. Then, before entering the hallway, I try to calm myself down a bit. I don't want to look too excited.

"Welcome back", I say and wrap my arms around his strong body. He sighs and wraps his arms around me, allowing his hands rest on my hips. I just nuzzle my forehead against his neck. He hums, smirks and kisses me quickly. His lips taste like mint. I've learned that he likes mint. And so do I. The mint his lips taste like. I smirk. Too soon he brakes the kiss. "What have you been up to? Anything useful?" he asks and raises and eyebrow. "Yeah.. well.. Um.. I've been doing some packing for Italy." He nods. "I'm proud of you." He grins. I roll my eyes. He tries to get his shoes off, but I refuse to let go of him, so it's slightly difficult. I drag my lips along his neck, and I feel his body shiver. "What's this, Nad?" he asks in amusement. "Just missed you, that's all."

He allows his eyes to flicker closed as I move my hand across his chest, unzip his black jacket and my hand caresses down his stomach. His hair is gelled up in the Zak-fin, but I allow my free hand to explore in his hair, and mess up the Zak-fin. As he opens his mouth to complain, I pull him by the jacket for a kiss.

And it's not just like any kiss. I feel the wall hit my head pretty aggressively, and his hands trap me between Zak and the wall. But I don't mind. I just.. Wow. I don't know what's gone into me. I just need him, right now. He kisses the corner of my mouth as I try hard to get rid of his jacket. He chuckles when I don't succeed. "You could survive an ice age with these clothes", I whisper to him. His laughter sounds amused, but somehow a bit smug. "I am only wearing clothes to make you crazy." I give him my best glare, and attack his lips with my full force again. This time the result is a silent whine that escapes between his lips. I am satisfied with that, and I lick a small trail down his strong, masculine jaw. I chuckle against his neck. "As much as I like you with all these clothes, I really like you so much more without them."

"Then make me take them off." Fuck you, Zak! Sometimes I almost get a chance to forget what a tease he usually is. And right now, he is annoying as hell. I'd really just like to get him out of those fucking thick layers of clothing, but I can't. Make me, he says instead. I roll my eyes and sigh. "I totally will, Zak. I totally will."

I start with the jacket. First I just try to take it off right away, but Zak moves his hands so that it's impossible. I give him another glare, but he just smirks innocently. "That's not what I mean", he whispers and I watch like a hawk when he licks his pink lips slightly nervously. I swallow excitedly. I continue what I was doing in the first place. I kiss his neck gently, looking for that one, really sensitive spot. I know it's there. And I'm really happy it is. Because when it comes to these things, it's pretty fucking hard to know what to do to make him melt. He tilts his head to the side, a silent moan escaping from his lips. "Oh, there is is..", I whisper. But he doesn't pay any attention to it. Then I just bite him. That draws another moan out of his chest. "May I now take off the jacket?" He blinks in confusion a few times, remembers his promise, and helps me rid him of the thick jacket.

He then suddenly entwines our fingers and leads me to my couch. He lays there, and pulls me on top of him. I chuckle as I land softly. "I thought we were supposed to watch a movie tonight", he says, trying to catch his breath. I try to touch as much of skin as possible. I look at him in disbelief. "Would you rather watch a movie?" I freeze. Confusion makes his face adorable. "No. No! Of course not", he replies quickly and pulls me closer for another rough kiss. "There's nothing better than spending the night like this, right here, with you." I smile and stare at those beautiful eyes. I am able to see my own reflection. His skin tastes like what I call "Zak". He has his own taste, his own scent. I just can't explain it.

Just as he is about to (finally) get rid of his shirt, we hear the doorbell ring. Really? Really? This just can't be true!