We Are the Damned

*Violets POV*
Angelo saved me from my own torture. He brought me back to his room and took care of me.
I just felt so enveloped with shame. I know what the guys did to me was wrong but i deserved it.
I look at all my scars, self afflicted and not. I can see the words carved into my skin. 'WHORE, SLUT, BITCH,USELESS, CUNT' I began to cry. I'd be lying is I said I hadn't mutilated myself at all the past two days. I have. Right now i was laying on grass in the backyard looking at the sky. Sort of wishing I was back to living my old life full of self-pitty, misery and self mutilation. I cringed at the thought of the blood spilling everywhere.

It started to rain,the warm dew falling on me. The pitter patter of the raindrops. The smell of rain falling down. I closed my eyes and in a way felt a sort of drunk. I felt drunk off of the nostalgia. Soon I heard the back door open. It was Angelo. I could smell his scent. "Violet" He sighed. I didn't reply. His voice sounded so soft and it made me sort of want to cry. Even his voice just made me feel sad in a way. Yet astonishingly happy."Violet it's raining. C'mon lets get you inside-" He grabbed my wrist to help me up and I screamed in pain. I screamed so loud that Ricky and Devin came outside to see what was wrong.

"Violet, you-you spoke. yo-you. wow. are you okay? whats going on?" Ricky asked genuinely concerned. Angelo looked at me knowingly. He pulled up my sleeve and even he was disgusted at the deep gashes. You could see the layers of skin. I saw such worry on his face. I pulled my arm away quickly and looked at the ground, ashamed. "Violet, why?" It was here that I took my turn to speak in front of all the guys. Because By now, all of them were outside. "Please" I whispered gently. They all looked a bit tooken back but there faces went from shocked to sad when I started to cry softly.

"Violet why would you do this? Why won't you eat? Why are you punishing yourself?" Angelo asked.
"I-um. I" I broke down. I started to shake, cry, bite myself furiously. I began to break down. I started to explain between soft cries, sloppy screams and barely audible words to him that I felt worthless because of my past. I felt like I was unworthy to be here and live this life with them. I told them how I deserved all this punishment. I apologized for being so weak and gross and hard to handle. Angelo shushed me but i went on. "Thats w-why I locked myself up. S-so-so you wouldn't h-hav-have to deal with m-me any-anymore" I sobbed.

Angelo just gently picked me up and carried me to the room. "That was enough tears for one night, lets get you all settled, okay?" I just nodded. He smiled at me softly. "Angelo?" "Yes love?"
"Why are you so nice to me? I don't get it..." "Because you're special. You're not like the rest."
I just stayed quiet after that. I was so sad and pained but I think here, with Angelo and the rest of the guys. Maybe I can get better. Angelo rubbed my arm gently. He pulled up the sleeve and kissed my arm gently. Just once. Then pulled down the sleeve again. "Listen Violet, I know this is soon. But considering we're both freaks of nature, we can feel things others can't. We can develop things better and faster. I know I'm inlove with you, and I think that you could be inlove with me." I just swallowed thickly and did something I had never done before. I put my hand on his cheek and moved in slowly. "Be still ok?" I whispered, very softly. He closed his eyes and I closed the space between us. I pulled away gently and smiled slightly. "Angelo....." I waiting for a second then finished. "I do love you."