Serendipity

No matter what you do in life, you're always going to be judged. People are going to exchange weary side glances with each other when you step on the train, or enter the store, or simply walk by them. Another thing that will happen is that you are going to judge other things and other people, whether it be intentional or subconsciously, but just know that it's okay. It's normal, it's healthy, and it's reality. But the only thing I ask of you is to never judge somebody by their past. People are generally not who they were four month ago, or a year ago, or three years ago. Judging somebody by their past would mean judging somebody who no longer exists, and really, what's the point in that?



"Are you going to jump in or what?"

Jack and I had walked and talked for a little while, not really about anything in particular. He told me more about Henry and how boring it was to live in Hyannis year-round because there was nobody to hang out with in the winter. He mentioned he wasn't in school because he thought the entire concept of college was a bullshit excuse to get money from people who don't have it and that he'd rather be happy without a degree than be miserable doing a job he doesn't actually want. I occasionally nodded in agreement and mentioned something about my life, but I was much more quiet than he was. I didn't want to bore him, my life hadn't been that exciting.

We eventually came to a cliff that stood above the calm ocean waters and ascended up to the top of it. I sat on the edge and tried to take in my surroundings, though it was difficult in the dark. My eyes made their way to Jack, only to see that he was standing and peering over the edge, rather than sitting with me. I had asked what he was doing, when all of a sudden, he leapt. I felt my heart stop as I scrambled to my feet and looked over the edge at a distance, waiting for him to resurface. He did.

"No!" I yelled so he could hear me over the waves crashing against some nearby rocks. Was he crazy?

"Do you trust me?" He shouted back as he treaded water.

"I barely know you!"

"Just trust me!" He demanded, swimming a little closer towards the cliff.

My body instinctively took a small step closer to the edge so that I could determine how high up I was. If my calculations were correct, I'd say that it was nearly a forty-five-foot jump to the water. I gulped, feeling my heart beat a little faster than normal, and shuffled back slightly.

Jack must have noticed my hesitance, even from forty-five feet under me. "Don't worry about getting hurt, I'll save you!"

I don't know what it was that made me trust him in that moment. Maybe it was the smoothness of his voice, or the way my mind was convinced that he could be my hero. Maybe I didn't even trust him; maybe I just wanted to do something bold for once in my overly-safe life. Whatever the reasoning was, I stripped off my sweatshirt and jeans and shoes and inhaled deeply before I leapt off the cliff, screaming the whole way. If I were to have died in that moment, I would have honestly been able to say that I have felt truly alive for once in my life.

Thankfully, I didn't die, and I felt Jack's fingers brush against my shoulder once I resurfaced. "How do you feel?" He asked, his dark, half-worried and half-overjoyed eyes locking with mine.

"Free as a bird," I responded, still breathless from the exhilaration and adrenaline pulsing through my veins. It was in that moment that I decided I did trust Jack, even though there weren't many things I knew about him. Despite the information we've exchanged, I still didn't know his last name, and he didn't know mine. I didn't know his favorite color or where his parents were or when his birthday was. And even though he was reckless and seemed to act without thinking, I decided that I needed somebody like that in my life. As much as I didn't want to think about it, I couldn't think about how safe George was. He never in a million years would have climbed this cliff, and never in a billion would he have jumped from it. George was safe. I loved George, so I love safety and security. But Jack was something else, and whatever it was, that was the something that I've been missing in life.

"I guess you don't need saving after all," He joked. Jack winked at me before swimming back to shore. He was a good swimmer, there was no way I could ever keep up with him.

You, dear boy, couldn't be more wrong.



I got back to the beach house around three in the morning, and I knew Kate was fast asleep because I could hear her snoring. Snoring was the only flaw Kate had, really. I tossed my wet clothes into the small laundry room and made my way to the bathroom to shower off the salt on my body and in my hair.

The majority of my time spent in the shower was dedicated to deep thinking, and it was no different with this shower. My thoughts usually revolved around people and why we say things we don't mean. Why we don't say things we want to say. Why we hurt the ones we love to protect them from the monsters and the demons that live and grow inside of us. Tonight, however, my mind was just wrapped around Jack, and I wondered about him more than I thought about him. I stood there, letting the hot droplets of water run over my skin, wondering if Jack had secrets. I wondered if he had monsters and demons inside of him that he would never show me. I wondered if I'd wake up one day and never see him again. Mostly, I wondered if he was even half the man I thought he was.

I stayed in the shower for thirty-seven minutes before I forced myself to shut the water off, wrap the towel around my damp body, and exit the bathroom. As soon as I opened the door, however, I saw a figure standing directly in front of me and screamed. Once I regained composure, I realized it was just Kate.

"What are you doing!?" I whisper-shouted, not wanting to wake up the neighbors or attract the attention of anyone wandering about outside on the beach.

Kate removed one hand from her hip and pointed it at me, poking me in the chest. "I think the better question is what are you doing taking a shower at three-thirty in the morning?"

I sighed with a shrug before turning my body and walking by her, making my way to my bedroom. "I just went for a walk, and decided to take a swim," I responded, which was technically true, "and then I didn't want to go to bed covered in salt, so I showered."

Of course, Kate was skeptical. "You totally fucked Jack."

I choked on my own spit and pulled the towel tighter around my body. "I did not!"

"I know you were with him!" She retaliated, quickly trailing into my room, "I heard you talking to someone when I was on the phone with Danny."

"It was Colton," I lied, though I wasn't really sure why I was lying, or keeping things from Kate, or getting so defensive.

Kate snorted. "Bullshit, I know that idiot's voice. It was definitely Jack!"

"Okay!" I yelled, avoiding eye contact with her by pulling a t-shirt and a pair of short shorts out of the dresser to wear to bed. Even when there was a fan on, and even in the middle of winter, I barely wore any clothes to bed. I was always really hot. "So Jack came over and asked me if I wanted to go for a walk. We went swimming and that was it. We did not bone."

I couldn't help but to feel myself blushing as Kate simply bit her lip and nodded before exiting the room, allowing me to change in privacy. She was so persistant in her efforts to get me laid so that I would stop thinking about George, but honestly, I don't think that would get my mind off of him. I think it would just make me miss him more.



It had been five days, and I hadn't heard from Jack since the night we jumped off the cliff. That wasn't my major concern, though. Kate was.

"India!" She screeched, covering her face with her hands as she collapsed onto the couch. Kate had been acting like a hot mess ever since we woke up four hours ago, but I couldn't say I was surprised. Danny Ginsberg had flown back to Scotland last night, and I thought she had handled it well. She didn't cry last night, or break down into hysterics, and stayed up with me and watched eighties musicals and ate coffee ice cream. But knowing that she would not receive a morning phone call from Danny this morning tore her apart, and she has been on an emotional rampage ever since the realization.

I picked up the couch pillow that had been angrily thrown across the living room and into the kitchen. "What do you want me to do, Kate?!" I started, desperate for an answer, "I've painted your nails! I took you out to the waffle house for breakfast! I cooked you three boxes of Velveeta!"

Kate groaned in response and rolled onto the floor. "I don't know!" She cried, stretching out the "o". Neither of us said anything for a couple of minutes. I was enjoying the silence, for one, but I could see that Kate was very concentrated on her thoughts as she linked her hands together and stared out of the window of the beach house. Smiling softly at how peaceful she looked for a change, I disappeared into my room and hopped onto my bed, resulting in a much needed nap after today's strenuous activities.

After about twenty minutes or so, I could feel myself being shaken awake. Opening one eye at a time, I slowly turned my head so that I was facing Kate's face, expecting her to look disheveled with messy hair and tear stained cheeks. Instead, I noted that she looked oddly enthusiastic. "What are you so happy about?" I questioned, sitting up and stretched my arms over my head.

"I'm going to Scotland."